


The Sound of Heartstrings

by mischiefgoddesscomplex



Category: Tasertricks - Fandom, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Eventual Smut, F/M, Jane Eyre(ish) AU, Jane and Darcy are BFFs, Language, Loki and Thor are musicians, Mention of Character Death, Non-superhero AU, Recreational drug usage, Slow Burn, Uncle Tony Stark, pop culture references, slight mention of alcohol abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-28
Updated: 2015-02-21
Packaged: 2018-02-19 01:42:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 71,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2369780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mischiefgoddesscomplex/pseuds/mischiefgoddesscomplex
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Darcy Lewis is just a college grad trying to make some money over the summer before finding a real job. But when she's hired as a nanny, she never imagined it would be for the daughter of musical prodigy and rock god, Loki Laufeyson. Taking care of a spoiled six year-old girl is one thing. Falling for her famous, silvertongue father? That's another thing entirely. AU real world setting. The Avengers/Superheroes don't exist, but the characters still do (and they're all <i>bamfs</i>).</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Home Sweet Home

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I tried, like, _really_ tried to wait to write this story. But it's been nagging on my mind constantly, and I absolutely had to start writing it. EVEN THOUGH I'm smack-dab in the middle of writing another story on here. I'm a bad person. Oops. So if my updates start to become a little irregular on my other story (I'm still a full-time student!!), please forgive me! 
> 
> I'm more excited about this story than I have been for any other Tasertricks I've written. Like the summary says, it's a real-world AU (both Loki and Thor are humans). It's kind of got a bit of a modern Jane Eyre vibe to it, if anyone is familiar with that story. I'm really excited to see what you guys think, please leave kudos and comments! Thank you oodles.

Darcy readjusts the sunglasses on the crook of her nose as she steps outside, squinting through the crappy quality nonetheless. Her hair is a mess of curls atop her head, her headphones dangle loosely around her neck, and she feels like a pack-mule with her over-stuffed duffel bags draped across her shoulders. Above her, the roar of a jet engine deafens out any other sounds as it takes off from the LAX tarmac behind her. 

Home sweet home. 

She can hear the frantic beeping of Jane’s car long before it comes into view. Darcy smiles as she teeters on the edge of the curb, watching as Jane weaves in and out of the airport traffic. When she pulls up beside Darcy, the car behind her is flipping her off. 

“Oh, suck it!” Darcy yells out to the driver, giving him her own one-finger salute as he pulls out and away. 

Jane rushes around the car, slamming her door closed, and almost tackles Darcy to the ground in a fierce hug, “Darce!” 

Darcy stumbles back a bit, the luggage she’s carrying threatening to topple her over to either side. She laughs at Jane’s embrace, hugging her best friend back with equal excitement, “Guess who’s back, baby!” 

“You have no idea how good it is to see you,” Jane says, pulling apart and offering to take some of Darcy’s bags. She pops the trunk and starts stuffing the luggage away. “How was graduation?”

“Eh, it was good,” Darcy says nonchalantly, finishing loading the car with Jane and then sliding into the passenger seat, “I mean, I’m almost twenty-four. So finally finishing college just felt like more of a massive relief than anything. No doubt mom and pops feel the same.”

Jane revs up her old and trusty green Honda again, pulling back out into traffic and away from the airport, “Hey, it’s different for everyone.”

Darcy shoots Jane a look that she misses, as she’s too focused on the road, “Easy for you to say, Miss ‘I got my degree in under four years and an instant job offer from NASA upon graduation’.”

Jane blushes modestly, “Oh come on, I haven’t seen you in over a year and you’re already pulling this card again? I just…it’s something I’d always known I wanted. I worked hard for it. And got lucky. Not to say that you…I mean…”

Jane starts to backtrack in a panic, but Darcy only laughs, putting her hand on Jane’s shoulder, “Dude, chill. I’m just giving you a hard time. Yeah, yeah, I know, I bounced around a lot with my major and wasted time: poli-sci, education, journalism." She counts them out on her fingers. "Even though I finally got a degree in marketing, I still have no frickin’ clue what I want to do with my life.” 

Jane looks over to Darcy with a sympathetic smile, “You’ll figure it out. At least your mom and dad are letting you stay with them until you find a job, right?”

Darcy groans, stretching back into her seat and kicking her black converse up on the dashboard, “That’s just the cherry on top - get out of the house for college and then head right back in. I talked to my mom on the phone the other week, and the room and board comes with a catch. She’s making me get a summer job until I find my ‘ _career_ ’.” Darcy puts as much disgusted, mocking emphasis into the last word as she can. 

“Oh, come on, that’s not so bad,” Jane says, trying to soften the situation, “Actually, it’s a pretty good idea. You can save up some money while you job hunt, at least. Know where you want to work yet?”

Darcy groans again, this time a little softer, “Nah. Somewhere exciting. I don’t want to be stuck in some stuffy office all day, you know?” 

Jane taps her fingers on the steering wheel, “What about your uncle?” 

Darcy laughs, a barking sound that fills the car, “Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love my uncle. But working for him would be the epitome of office-type work, especially at an entry-level job, trust me. And even he wouldn’t be stupid enough to trust a recent college grad with anything higher than that in his company.” 

“But I bet the pay is amazing,” Jane counters, weighing one hand in the air, “And it’s a guaranteed job with him being family and all. He’s going to be at your grad party tomorrow night, right? You should ask him.”

Darcy just shrugs, wanting to change the subject. The prospect of the future scares her, for sure. But the longer she dwells on it, the more anxious she becomes. She leans over, pressing the stereo on. She flips casually through a few of Jane’s preset stations, not really paying attention to the music.

“Wait, keep it here!” Jane says, throwing out her hand to keep Darcy from changing the song. The first notes of a bass guitar waft out of the speakers, and Jane hums along in unison, “I love this song!” 

The song in question was one that Darcy loved and recognized, too. Hell, the entire world would recognize it. That iconic bass guitar, followed by the steady rhythm of a drum march. Like Coldplay circa-early 2000s and the Black Keys married and had a musical baby. This song in particular had been popular back when both Jane and Darcy were in high school (Jane had been a senior, Darcy a sophomore). 

Darcy speaks up above the music, “I still can’t believe _The Odinsons_ broke up, sometimes. Their music is like, a religious experience.”

“All the best bands do,” Jane sighs sadly, turning off the interstate and onto a neighborhood street, “What ever happened to them?”

Darcy makes an indifferent sound, trying to recall what she’d read about it in online blogs and in magazines over six years ago, “I’m not really sure. They had a fallout. Thor’s still making music, you know. I’m not really sure whatever happened to Loki…” 

Darcy lets her sentence hang unfinished as the girls drive in silence, listening to the song. Jane rolls down the windows, and both girls stick their hands out, catching the air on their fingertips and moving their wrists to the melody of the song. And they both look over and giggle when they catch the other one doing it. 

Soon enough, Jane pulls up to the front of Darcy’s relatively modest, two-story home in Santa Monica. Darcy’s house was definitely modest in comparison to others nearby - with a white stucco finish, a brown brick trim, plenty of palm trees surrounding the garden, and even a small backyard pool. It wasn’t much, but with only her mom, her father, and herself living at home, they hadn’t needed extravagance. 

“So I’ll see you tomorrow night for your graduation party?” Jane asks once she’s helped Darcy take all of her luggage out of the trunk. 

“You better,” Darcy says in a mock-threatening voice, “I can’t deal with all my parents’ crazy friends and relatives alone.” She heaves all of her bags onto her shoulders and grabs the handles of her suitcases, blowing out an exaggerated breath under all the weight. “Will I get to see you a lot this summer?” Darcy asks hopefully. 

Jane smiles back, a warm and hopeful look on her face, “I’m counting on it. I’m taking time away from the office to work on a new nuclear-related cosmos theory from home.”

“Not really sure what that means, but somewhere in there I heard that I’ll be seeing your face more often, and that’s all that matters to me,” Darcy says, and Jane laughs, leaning in to hug her friend goodbye. Darcy can’t help but think how good it feels to finally be with her best friend again, especially after so much time apart. Skype and Facebook can only do so much.

“See you tomorrow night!” Jane says, climbing back into the driver’s seat of her car.

__________________________________

Darcy feels like she needs a drink about half-way through the party, which might just be a new record for her. Her mom hovers nearby, pushing her into old friends and relatives, forcing her to talk about herself.

By this point, Darcy has the whole spiel memorized: _I graduated with a degree in marketing, actually. No, I’m not really sure where I want to work yet. I’m sure something will open up, too. No, no boyfriend either. Yes, I’m sure I’ll meet someone soon, too._

She wants to bang her head against the wall. 

Darcy checks her phone, noticing a text from Jane telling her she’s going to be later than she thought. Some kind of breakthrough in her research. Darcy sighs, but she can’t help herself from smiling a little. Same old Jane. 

“Darcy, put your phone away!” Her mom nags from over her shoulder, tugging on her sleeve gently, “You’re being rude to your guests.” 

Darcy rolls her eyes, feeling like a teenager, “You mean _your_ guests?” 

“They’re still here for _you_ ,” Darcy’s mom tries to make a point, but Darcy is distracted by the man with the stylish facial hair, expensive suit, and sunglasses walking through the front door. 

“The party…. _has arrived_ ,” The man announces with flair, just loud enough so that the people around all stop and smile at him. Some whispers float through the crowd ( _“Is that Tony Stark?” “No way, it can’t be.” “Did you know they were related to Tony Stark?”_ ), but Darcy is too excited to pay any attention. 

“Uncle Tony!” She screeches, running over to where he stands in the foyer. She runs up to him, throwing her arms around his neck, and he responds in kind by wrapping her up in a large hug that almost lifts her feet off the ground. 

“What’s shakin’, kiddo?” Tony asks, ever-exuding coolness. Darcy hasn’t seen him since she graduated high school, but he’s exactly the same as she remembers. As the CEO of a top Fortune-500 company run out of Malibu, he was reasonably busy, and she can’t hold it against him. 

“I’m so glad you made it,” Darcy says, and she means it. Tony Stark, her mother’s brother in-law, is by far her favorite relative. It’s safe to say he’s nothing at all like her parent’s other stiff friends, and his presence at the party has instantly lifted her spirits. 

Walking up behind him is a tall, strawberry-blonde woman with light freckles. She’s wearing a smart, stylish white pantsuit and holding a matching clutch. She smiles warmly when she sees Darcy as she says, “Congrats on graduating!” 

“Hey, Aunt Pepper! Thanks,” Darcy says with a smile, turning to embrace Tony’s wife (and her mother’s sister) in a hug. She’s thrilled that the both of them are there. Now she can finally escape the dull hum-drum of boring party chatter. She grabs Tony by the wrist and leads him out back to where the cooler full of alcohol is, “Come on, I’ll get you guys a drink.”

“I knew you were my favorite niece for a reason.”

“I’m your only niece, Tony.”

“Touché.”

__________________________________

Later in the night, the party is slowly dying down as people trickle out every fifteen minutes or so. Even Jane has already stopped by and visited for a while before heading back to her lab. The back porch lights are on, and a warm breeze that hints of the summer weather to come blows through the trees in the backyard.

Darcy sits with her legs tucked underneath her in a chair, nursing a wine glass as she listens to Tony’s stories. She’s in stitches laughing at some of his escapades, while Pepper only smiles knowingly and rolls her eyes beside him. Not only are Tony and Pepper the heads of Stark Industries, they’re also socialites. Tony more so than Pepper, but all the same, his stories involving his celebrity friends are wild.

“I’ve missed you guys, seriously,” Darcy says at one point, honesty in her voice. 

“We’ve missed you too, kiddo,” Tony says, patting her knee with one hand. With any other relative, the gesture might come across as insincere, but Darcy knows her uncle really is genuine. 

“You know you’re more than welcome to come up to Malibu and visit us this summer,” Pepper throws out into the conversation, and Tony nods his head in agreement. 

“Thanks guys, I wish I could,” Darcy says, biting on her bottom lip, “But I’ve got to stay here and find a way to make some cash for the summer while I look for my ‘career’.” There’s that word again. Darcy pulls a face as she says it. 

“Come work for Stark Industries,” Tony says like it’s obvious, “We can get you a desk job like that.” He snaps his fingers for emphasis. 

Darcy winces, knowing this would come up at some point, and hating that she’s letting him down, “I appreciate the offer, but…I just don’t know if it’s right for me, you know?”

Tony shakes his head, letting her know it’s no big deal, “I understand, kiddo. Forge your own path and all. But if you need to make money, you know who to talk to.” 

Darcy laughs, “I know, I know. You make earning money look easier than taking candy from a baby.” 

Tony waves her off in mock humbleness, but he’s grinning despite the fact. He takes a sip of wine from his glass and sets it down, looking like an idea has struck him, “Darcy, you used to babysit, right?”

“I did,” Darcy says, remembering how she made her gas money all throughout high school by babysitting the Roberts twins next door, “I can’t guarantee I didn’t steal their candy though.”

Tony chuckles, “Yeah, right. The only reason I ask is because I just remembered something. You said you need to make some money this summer until you find a real job, right?”

“I do…” Darcy says curiously, wondering where he might be going with this. 

“I have this…friend. Acquaintance, really,” Tony says, swirling the rim of his wine glass with his index finger, “He mentioned to me recently that he’s looking for a nanny for his six-year old girl this summer. They live in the Hills, just the two of them.”

Darcy raises an eyebrow, her curiosity peaked, “Who?”

Tony looks over to Pepper with a wicked grin, placing one finger to his lips before turning back to Darcy, “It’s a secret. For security and privacy reasons, I'm not at liberty to tell you just yet. I think you’re smart enough to figure out by this point that the person I’m talking about is considerably famous. I’ll give him a call tomorrow, tell him you’ll stop by for an interview next Friday.”

“You can’t be serious,” Darcy says, her mouth hanging open. 

“Serious as a heart attack,” Tony smirks, grabbing his cell from out of his pocket, “I’m texting you the address now. Just dress to kill, and you’ve got the job.” 

Pepper rolls her eyes and jabs Tony’s side, “ _And_ be prepared to answer any childcare questions and concerns he has. Bring your certifications with you, too.” 

“You guys…this is…oh my god,” Darcy stares at them with shock. She hadn't expected to find a summer job this fast. And working for someone famous? She was hitting a jackpot. “This is probably one of the raddest things ever. Thank you so much.”

“Hey, don’t thank me until you’ve landed the job,” Tony says with a smile, “Which you obviously will. Because you’re my niece. And you rock harder than any of my other nieces combined.” 

“I’m your only niece, Tony.”

“And don’t you forget it.”


	2. Just a Touch of Peanut Butter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm looking forward to introducing more familiar characters into this AU! It's going to be fun to incorporate them all into real world settings, while still alluding to what makes them special as superheroes. Comments and kudos are always loved!

“I think you looked fine in what you were wearing two outfits ago, really. Or what you wore three outfits ago. Or what you’re wearing now. Honestly, Darcy, you look fine in anything.” 

Jane sighs as she lays across Darcy’s bed on her stomach, her pencil scratching away every now in then in the formula notebook she has lying under her chin. She looks back over to Darcy, who is standing in front of her bedroom mirror, tugging on the blazer she’s wearing. 

“The point is not to _look fine_ , Jane,” Darcy says with a bit of an irritated huff (more at herself than Jane), “The point is to look perfect.” 

“Fine then, you look perfect,” Jane offers patiently, sitting up on Darcy’s bed and crossing her legs. “You haven’t got much time left to decide anyway. Beverly Hills is at least a half hour drive, and you never know about the traffic.”

Darcy puffs out her cheeks and blows out a long breath, looking at herself in the mirror. She peels off the blazer and chucks it aside, reaching for her favorite deep purple cardigan and slipping it on over her black camisole. She does a small twirl in the mirror, approving how it matches with her black skirt, tights, and booties. With the cardigan, the look comes across as softer and more maternal, not as business casual and stiff. 

“Alright, what do you think?” Darcy asks Jane, spinning around and striking a pose. 

Jane eyes her up and down with a nod of her head, “It’s _perfect_. But like I said Darce, you really should be mindful of the time. Do you know how to get there?”

“Thanks, _mom_ ,” Darcy teases, rolling her eyes. She walks over to the dresser and spritzes her wrists with her favorite floral perfume, “And yeah, Tony texted me the address.” 

“But you still don’t know who the mystery employer is?” Jane asks, chewing on the top of her pencil’s eraser. 

“No,” Darcy replies, taking off her glasses to apply a light shade of eye makeup, “And I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t freaking out about the possibilities.” 

“He didn’t even give you a clue?” Jane pushes, curiosity in her voice. 

“Well, he said the guy lives alone with his six year-old daughter,” Darcy offers with a thoughtful shrug, placing her glasses back atop her nose. “Can you think of any famous bachelor with a kid that age?” 

Jane throws her hands up in the air, “You know more about celebrity gossip than me. Guess you’ll just have to wait and find out.” 

Darcy grabs her resume and certifications from off her dresser, neatly slipping them inside a folder. She takes one last look at herself in the mirror, making sure to look away before she can second guess her outfit one last time. 

“Guess I will.”

__________________________________

As soon as Darcy turns into Beverly Hills, she becomes hyper-aware of just how old and clunky her dented blue 2008 Toyota Corolla is. At a stop light, a gaggle of teenaged boys piled into a sleek Audi convertible pull up next to her. Darcy doesn’t make eye contact until they rev the engine.

Looking over, the boy in the drivers seat is wagging his tongue out at her. Ew. 

“Hey baby, what’s your number?” One of the boys calls out, and the rest of them giggle like a bunch of school girls. 

Without missing a beat, Darcy leans out the window and answers, “Why, you looking for a babysitter?” 

The boy who had used the pickup line turns red in the cheeks, while the rest of the boys howl with laughter. Darcy smirks as she turns left, leaving the car behind. The Hills always were full of a bunch of self-entitled little pricks. 

Darcy checks her iPhone as it navigates her into a more secluded neighborhood, off-shooting the main streets. The houses are becoming larger and larger, and Darcy can’t help stare in awe at some of the modern and hip architecture. Large, gated houses take up almost half of the block, some shrouded in retaining walls, hedges, and palm trees. She wouldn’t be surprised if more than a few celebrities lived in this neighborhood. 

When her phone pings and alerts her to her destination approaching on the left, Darcy’s jaw drops wide open. She can see the house as she rolls closer: a massive stone mansion, much different than the white new-age looking houses nearby. It looks more like it belongs alongside royal estates in Europe than in Beverly Hills. 

Darcy pulls up to the ornate iron gate and rolls down her window, noticing a button keypad and a speaker. She presses the call button as she waits nervously for an answer. She’s starting to sweat a little, and she regrets driving with the windows down instead of blasting the AC. Too late now. 

“Hello, may I ask who’s calling?” A voice responds over the speaker, sharp and professional sounding. It’s a woman’s. 

“Um, yeah, hi,” Darcy responds with uncertainty, “I’m Darcy Lewis. My uncle Tony Stark told me - ”

She doesn’t even have to finish her sentence, because she’s cut off by the sound of a loud buzzing noise and the gate retracting. Cautiously, she pulls forward, driving up a long, gravelly, winding path that leads up to the front of the house. All around her is a lush green lawn, a sprinkler system chirping as it waters the grass. It’s all very Downton Abbey looking, and a stone fountain bubbles as the centerpiece of the drive as it loops in a circle in the front of the house. Whoever owns this house definitely has money. And lots of it. 

Darcy’s not sure where to park, so she just loops around the fountain and turns her car off there. She steps out into the blinding sunlight, the day already way too hot for mid-May. Nervously, she gathers her purse and folder into her hands, shuts her car door, and walks up to the front of the house. A giant set of double doors in a dark wood finish greet her, complete with a set of ornate knockers. Darcy is in the middle of debating whether or not she should actually use them (because they are just so outlandish), when fortunately the door opens from the other side. 

A woman about Darcy’s height is holding open the door. Although, with her short, red curly hair and matching red lips, the woman seems much more imposing than Darcy. She’s wearing a tight black pant-suit with a red belt cinching at her tiny waist. The woman has a tablet in her hand, and she clicks at a few things with her index finger before looking at Darcy, “Hello, Miss Lewis. I’m Natasha Romanov. Come inside.” 

It’s not often that Darcy is left speechless, but she merely nods her head as she follows Natasha inside the mansion. Already, the inside of the foyer is composed of a beautiful white marble with matching columns. A giant crystal chandelier hangs above them, and Darcy has never seen so many diamonds in her life. Natasha motions with one finger for Darcy to follow her as her heels click down the hallway. 

“Um, Miss Romanov?” Darcy asks hesitantly as she follows the woman.

“Call me Natasha,” She replies, looking over her shoulder with a small smile. 

“Okay, Natasha,” Darcy says, looking at the artwork that lined the walls as they walked. No doubt one painting alone was more expensive than her entire college career. “I’m not trying to be rude, just trying to figure this out. Tony said I was going to be working for a man? Are you his…um…?”

Natasha barks out a laugh, throwing her head back and causing her curls to bounce around her shoulders, “Oh god no. No, I’m not his wife. Or his girlfriend. I’m the head of his security detail.” 

Security detail? Holy shit. Darcy’s brain whirrs at a hundred miles a minute trying to figure out just who exactly she was about to be applying to work for. Natasha leads Darcy into what looks like a lounge room area. Couches are set up around a fireplace, and a set of bay windows overlooking a garden illuminate the whole room. A grand piano sits in front of them with the lid propped open. 

“So…who is this mysterious _he_?” Darcy asks, deciding that she rather likes Natasha with her sarcastic laugh and dry voice. 

Natasha raises an eyebrow knowingly as she sits down on a couch and gestures for Darcy to sit across from her, “I can’t tell you just yet. Don’t take it personally. It’s for security reasons. My employer values his privacy. If you find out, and we end up not hiring you, then you’ll already know who he is and where he lives. You might go out and post his address to Twitter. Et cetera, et cetera. Then I’m living in a head of security’s worst nightmare. You can see the risk in that, right?” 

Darcy nods her head, swallowing the nervous lump in her throat. 

“Good,” Natasha says, glancing down at her tablet, “So, Darcy, tell me about - ”

They’re interrupted by the sound of pattering footsteps, followed by the lounge door creaking open. A small girl runs in, her raven black hair swishing around her face. In her hands she holds a little doll, and there are tears in her eyes. 

“Natasha, Natasha!” She cries, holding the doll up in front of Natasha’s face, “She’s broken. I broke Lillian!”

The girl waves the doll in front of Natasha’s face, and Natasha looks visibly uncomfortable as she holds up the doll for inspection. Darcy can see a wad of gum stuck in the doll’s blonde hair from where she sits. Instantly, Darcy is reminded of the time she faced a smilier problem in her childhood. Natasha sighs, “Fenix, you know you’re not allowed to have gum.”

For some reason, this only makes the little girl cry harder. Darcy stands up and walks over to the pair of them, taking the doll out of Natasha’s hands. Natasha looks at her curiously, but Darcy just inspects the doll and says, “Do you have any peanut butter?” 

Natasha stands and cocks her head, “Yeah, yeah we do. Be right back with that.” 

Natasha’s heels click hurriedly out of the room, and Darcy kneels down in front of the little girl. “I think I can fix Lillian for you.” 

“Really?” Fenix asks hopefully, her eyes still wet from the tears, “How?”

“Well, let’s just say the same thing happened to me when I was your age,” Darcy coos understandingly, “Except the gum wasn’t stuck in my doll’s hair. It was stuck in mine.”

The girl throws her hands up to her mouth and giggles, “Nuh-uh.”

“Yeah-huh,” Darcy says in response, twirling her hair with one finger, “And I think my hair looks pretty good now, don’t you?”

Fenix nods her head in agreement as Natasha comes back in carrying a spoonful of peanut butter, “It’s chunky,” She shrugs, handing over the spoon to Darcy, “Hope that doesn’t make a difference.” 

“Nah,” Darcy says, scooping the peanut butter onto her index finger and then smothering it on top of the doll’s head, coating the gum with the substance. After a minute of rubbing it in, Darcy plucks at the gum, and it slides right off of the doll’s head. Fenix’s eyes are wide with disbelief and delight.

“There ya go,” Darcy says, handing over the doll to the little girl as Natasha offers her a paper towel to clean her fingers, “All she needs is a bath, and she’s brand new.”

“Woo hoo!” The little girl cheers, clutching at her doll and racing away. 

Natasha looks at Darcy after Fenix has left the room, “Wow. I’m impressed. I thought we were about three seconds away from a nuclear meltdown there.” Darcy shrugs like it’s no big deal, but on the inside she feels the swell of pride at impressing Natasha. 

“And that was obviously my employer’s daughter, Fenix, whom you would be nannying.” Natasha says, gesturing for the two of them to sit back down again. “Now, back to the list of questions I have - ”

“Forget them, Natasha,” a deep, male British voice calls out suddenly from the doorway, “She’s hired.”

Darcy looks over at the man who had spoken and then back to Natasha. And then she does a double-take. Because she’d recognize that voice anywhere. 

Standing there in the doorway is a tall, lanky man clad in tight black leather pants and an iconic, dark green cotton v-neck. His lean and wiry arms fold across his chest, and when he flips his dark black hair out of his face, Darcy can see those legendary piercing emerald eyes staring straight at her.

Standing there in the doorway is none other than rock god and silver-tongued legend, Loki Odinson.


	3. Darcy 'Hotcakes' Lewis, At Your Service

Darcy can hardly believe her eyes. Never in a million years would she have guessed her potential employer to be the second half of the famous Odinson brothers duo. The same Odinson duo that she listened to on repeat in high school. That played sold out shows across the world. That had legions of fans screaming their names wherever they went. That had their faces plastered over every magazine cover to ever go to print no less than six years ago. She has _got_ to talk to Tony about meeting more of his friends.

“You’re…you’re Loki Odinson!” Darcy cries out loud with a mix of disbelief and surprise. She stands up from the couch she had just sat down on and smooths out her skirt self-consciously. 

“I go by Loki Laufeyson now,” Loki corrects her with just a hint of chill in his voice, and Darcy’s cheeks heat up a little. Right, hadn’t she read that somewhere after he had the fallout with his brother? Then again, Loki had done a pretty good job of staying out of the spotlight for the last few years, how was she to remember? 

“Sorry, Mister Laufeyson,” Darcy responds, fidgeting slightly, “It’s just that…I mean, I didn’t know…”

“It’s fine,” He cuts her babbling off a little too quickly, waving one hand. Darcy bites down on her lip and stares at him. He must be at most thirty or thirty-one by now…the last time she’d ever seen his face on any kind of media outlet, he had been her age. But he hardly looks like he’s aged at all. Still the same sharp cheekbones, gorgeously wild black hair, and wide, green eyes as she remembers. 

Natasha takes this moment to interject, “Sorry, did I hear you right? She’s _hired_? Just like that?” 

Loki nods his head, sauntering into the room, “Just like that. I saw what you did for Fen,” He says, tilting his chin at Darcy, “You were brilliant. Completely defused the situation. The last nanny we had quit in a fucking rage, didn’t she?”

Natasha lifts her eyebrows in agreement, “I remember. But Loki, I haven’t even run her background check yet. Haven’t even asked her anything. Literally all we know about Darcy Lewis is that she’s Stark’s niece and she’s good with peanut butter.” Natasha pauses to look at Darcy with sympathy, “No offense.” 

Darcy holds up her hands, “None taken.” 

“She’s Stark’s niece, and I trust him,” Loki muses, one long finger on his lips, “Plus, you saw her with Fen just now. This is the one, I’m telling you. You’ll have plenty of time to run background checks while I give her a tour of the house and a description of the job.”

Natasha rolls her eyes as subtly as possible, like she’s been dealing with Loki’s shit for a while and expertly knows how to put up with it. Darcy can’t help the small grin tugging up at the corners of her mouth - she can’t believe he’s so adamant about hiring her. Loki walks over to the couch Darcy had been sitting on and snatches up her folder. He leafs through it before pulling out her certifications. 

“Your CPR and first aid have expired,” He says, leveling her a glare with narrowed eyes. There is no patience in his voice as he hands the documents to Natasha, his eyes on Darcy the entire time, “I expect you to have remedied that by the next time I see you.” 

The tone of his voice makes Darcy feel like she’s under the careful watch of a drill sergeant. “Sir, yes, sir,” She says, throwing him a mock salute. 

Both Loki and Natasha regard her with curious expressions. Only Natasha has a hint of a smile on her face as she bites back a small laugh. Loki just stares at her blankly, unamused, before turning around, gesturing with one hand for Darcy to follow him. 

“Run her background, Natasha,” Loki says authoritatively, walking out of the room with Darcy in tow, “Miss Lewis, if you’ll follow me.” 

“Have fun,” Natasha whispers sarcastically as Darcy passes by, only loud enough for her to hear. Natasha then throws her a private mock salute with two fingers, winking as she walks out a door on the other side of the room. Yeah, Darcy definitely likes that woman. 

Darcy follows Loki out of the room, taking a quick few steps to keep up with his long gait. They walk down the hall and into a wide, beautiful kitchen. Sterling silver everything, and the kitchen island is made out of the same white marble as the foyer in the front of the house. Loki pauses and looks at Darcy, “You know how to cook, I presume?”

Darcy nods her head, “I was the one who organized the Sunday morning brunches for my dorm floor back in college. Darcy ‘Hotcakes’ Lewis they used to call me.” Darcy laughs a little at her own joke, but Loki just regards her cooly, fully unamused. She coughs awkwardly as she regains a serious speaking tone, “Yeah. I can cook.” 

“Good,” Loki says sharply, looking from her to the kitchen. “We have a personal chef on hand during the evenings and weekends, but I expect you to prepare breakfast and lunch for Fenix. Follow me, I’ll show you the rest of the house.” 

Loki drags her along, and the house is even bigger than Darcy imagined from the outside. He shows her the living room, the library, the _five_ guest bathrooms, the recreation center (which was a classy speakeasy-type room, complete with a pool table, a bar, a card table, and even included a movie screen and comfortable reclining chairs). Darcy’s sure she’s seen heaven. 

After he’s shown her around the grounds outside - including a massive swimming pool, a hot tub, a botanical garden center, and a small petting zoo for Fenix (seriously, a _petting zoo_. With two sheep, three little teacup pigs, and a little family of ducks) - Loki takes Darcy up to the area of the house where all of the bedrooms are located.

They pause outside of Fenix’s room and Loki knocks gently before pushing open the door, “Fen, there’s someone I’d like you to meet.” 

Darcy and Loki step into the room, and Darcy’s first thought is that she would have loved a room like this as a child. The walls are painted a light green and yellow, illustrated with little pictures of jungle animals. Fenix sits in the middle of the room, surrounded by mountains of dolls, stuffed animals, and other neat trinkets and toys. She looks up at them as they enter, her dolls still in her hands.

“I’ve already met her,” Fenix says in a mildly uninterested tone that only children know how to pull off, “She fixed Lillian. Is she going to be my mom?” 

The two of them stiffen awkwardly, and Darcy’s eyes practically bug out of her head. She has no idea what to say, making a series of stammering noises. Leave it to children to be that blunt. Thankfully, Loki is quick to regain composure, “No, sweetheart. This is Darcy Lewis. She’s going to be your new nanny.” 

“Oh,” Fenix says, looking back down at her dolls, “Okay. Good. I like her. She can stay.”

Darcy laughs a little, and she catches Loki’s grin out of the corner of her eye. Fenix is almost instantly consumed with playing with her dolls again, so Loki turns to her, tugging on her sleeve and gesturing for the two of them to leave.

Once they’re out in the hallway, Loki points to a door down the hall, “This will be your room.”

Darcy stops in her tracks, “Wait. What?”

Loki looks at her like it’s obvious, “Your room. You’ll be staying with us. The job is full-time, Monday through Friday morning. You have the weekends off to go home and do as you please. But I can’t have you driving from Santa Monica every morning and evening.”

Darcy chews on her lower lip. He does have a point. And it’ll be nice to have an excuse not to be living with her parents during the summer. She can feel her phone burning in her pocket, and she’s just itching to text Jane to tell her she’s about to be moving into a rock legend’s house. 

Darcy follows Loki into the bedroom, and he opens the door to show her the space. It wasn’t as exquisite as the rest of the house, but still nicely furnished: a queen-sized bed in green and golds, her own dresser, closet, television, and private bathroom. Definitely not bad at all. 

“I hope it’s up to your standards,” Loki says, not knowing that it’s even nicer than her room at home, and definitely nicer than the shitty apartments and dorm rooms she’d lived in during college. 

As they walk out of the room, Darcy notices a set of double doors at the far end of the hall, opposite of her bedroom. It’s the only place he hasn’t shown her. “What’s in there?” She asks, jerking her thumb towards the doors before Loki can walk in the opposite direction.

“That,” Loki begins pointedly, “Is my room. And within that, my recording studio. It’s soundproof, so if you’re worried about the noise, don’t be. Both of those places are strictly off-limits. No exceptions. That’s why I need a nanny for Fenix. I spend most of my days…and nights…in that studio.” 

Darcy blinks with surprise. Recording studio? Does that mean…?

“Wait,” Darcy calls out, stopping Loki from walking away again, “Are you getting back together with your brother?”

The question causes Loki to freeze for a second, before his face hardens into a much more sinister look, “No.” 

“Oh. I just thought…” Darcy glances from the room back to Loki, “I mean…I’m such a big fan of your music - ”

“ - Thank you -”

“ - that I thought that maybe…I dunno,” Darcy fumbles with her words, only realizing how stupid she sounds before it’s too late. “I guess I was just hoping you might be getting back together. Why did you ever break up, anyway?” 

Loki takes a step closer, forcing Darcy to take a tiny one backwards, which bumps her into the wall. He lets out a calculated breath and narrows his eyes as he looks at her. That alone sends shivers down her spine, and she knows she’s made a mistake. “Miss Lewis. I’ve hired you to be a nanny for my daughter. That job description does not include prying into my personal life. If you don’t think you can handle that, I’ll gladly find another young woman to pay fifteen hundred dollars a week to. Am I clear?” 

Fifteen hundred?! Holy shit, she was about to make a serious bankroll. “Clear as crystal,” Darcy responds, her voice unwavering and serious. 

Loki stares at her a little longer than he should, his eyes boring into hers, before finally making a sound of approval and turning to walk back down the stairs. Okay, _jerk_. Darcy lets out a nervous, shaky breath, making a mental note to be more careful about that damn filter between her mouth and brain next time. 

At the foot of the stairs in the foyer, Natasha is waiting with Darcy’s folder in hand. “Everything checks out,” She says, talking to Loki but handing the folder back to Darcy. 

“Perfect,” Loki says, looking from Natasha to Darcy, “You’ll start on Monday. School is already out for the year, but Fenix has a ballet class and an art class every other day from Monday to Thursday. You’ll need to drive her to those and pick her up. If you have any other questions, Natasha will be here on Monday morning to answer them for you. Her work schedule is fluid, so you might see her in and out of the house at any time.”

Natasha nods her head, “I think we still have the old nanny’s itinerary on file. If you want, I can print it out and give it to you on Monday. It’s got all of the information about Fenix you need on it. I’ve also written my cell number in your file if you have any questions over the weekend.” 

“That’s great, thank you,” Darcy says, smiling warmly at Natasha. She turns to leave but freezes for a second, a question burning on the tip of her tongue, “Can I just ask…what happened to the last nanny?” 

Natasha pulls a tense face, but Loki just looks at Darcy cooly and responds calmly, “She decided that she’d had enough when Fenix accidentally set fire to the kitchen. We’ll see you on Monday, Miss Lewis.”

Oh.

Perfect.

__________________________________

That night, Darcy presses her phone between her shoulder and her ear, frantically typing away on Google as she chats with Jane on her cell.

“Set fire to the kitchen?!” Jane repeats in shock, “Wow.” 

“I know, right?” Darcy says, scrolling through the results after her query about Loki, “She seemed pretty normal to me, but we’ll see.” 

“I still can’t believe you’re nannying for _thee_ Loki Odinson,” Jane says, and Darcy can hear the amazement in her voice. “I didn’t even know he had a kid!” 

“Loki _Laufeyson_ ,” Darcy corrects her mockingly, “You know, he seems like he can be a massive prick. I asked him about his brother and he got all tensed up and freaked out on me. Like, chill, dude. I guess that’s a pretty touchy subject for him.”

“I _guess_ ,” Jane says, and Darcy can almost see Jane rolling her eyes on the other end of the phone, “But hey, I’ve got to go. This radiation flux formula won’t solve itself. Let me know what you find out about him on Google.”

“Only if you promise to tear yourself away from all that science-y garble at some point tonight and take a break,” Darcy teases, and she’s only half-kidding. 

“What are you talking about?” Jane replies defensively, “I’m on the phone with you, this was the break!”

“Oh, my sweet, nerdy Jane,” Darcy sighs into the phone, “We are going to get you out of the house and show you a good time this summer. Mark my words.” 

“Bye, Darcy.”

“Bye, Einstein.” 

Darcy clicks her iPhone off, setting it down on her bed, and pulls her laptop closer to her so she can focus on the results she’s getting. She’d hoped to maybe do a little more research about Loki before going back on Monday, but the man had done a better job at staying out of the limelight than she’d imagined. She wonders idly if Natasha helped play any part in that.

Darcy clicks through the articles, but the most popular ones focus on when Thor and Loki were still making music together. They had been huge - two, young, twenty year-olds (Thor was older than Loki by a few years) who had started playing in house parties and local clubs in England, and had risen to rock god stardom almost overnight, making the move from London to Los Angeles. Thor played the drums, Loki the guitar and vocals. Everybody knew their names. Everybody knew their faces. 

Then suddenly, about six years ago, they split. Darcy finds one Rolling Stone article about it and clicks the link. Both Thor and Loki had refused to do any interviews about the split, but both parties cited “creative differences” as the reason for the breakup. Darcy wonders if that was all - after all, as far as she could tell, the two brothers haven’t seen or talked to each other in years. Seemed like a lot of dramatics over something as common as creative differences. 

She clicks through a few more articles. Thor still makes music, and while it’s pretty poplar, it’s nowhere on the same scale as _The Odinsons_. Darcy can hardly find anything on Loki that isn’t dated within the last five years. Nothing on Fenix either. Darcy wonders who the mother is, and why she wasn’t in the picture. But there’s no way in hell she’s about to ask him that, especially after his reaction today. Maybe she'll ask Natasha, eventually. 

Darcy sighs, and after registering for a CPR and first aid renewal class on Sunday, shuts her laptop off and lays back in her bed, staring up at the ceiling. She tries to close her eyes, but she’s still jittery from the excitement of the day, and sleep doesn’t come easy. She’s not sure what she’s gotten into exactly, but one thing she does know for sure:

Her world is about to get rocked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to leave a little note here: while this story echoes Jane Eyre in a lot of ways, I promise there's not going to be some bat-shit crazy ex-wife jumping out of the attic at the end! A few people have asked me about that, haha. Hope you're all enjoying it so far anyway, though!


	4. Mommy Issues

Darcy has just finished unpacking all of the clothing and belongings she needs in her guest room Monday morning when there is a brisk knock on the door. She looks over her shoulder, folding her last shirt into the dresser, “Come in!” 

The door opens and Natasha steps inside, looking just as fiercely gorgeous as the first time Darcy had seen her. Darcy wonders if the woman dresses in black because it’s something a stealthy security agent would wear, or because she just likes the color...but either way, she looks stunning in her business casual black dress and red heels. 

“I have an itinerary for you,” She says, handing over a manilla folder to Darcy, “It has everything pertinent in it: dietary restrictions for Fenix, bedtimes, nap times, addresses for her classes, the cell numbers for everyone important. It should cover all the bases.” 

Darcy grabs the folder and sighs, grateful for all the help, “You are amazing. How long have you been working for Loki?”

Natasha purses her lips, making a thinking sound, “At least seven or eight years. I’ve known him for a long time. When he recruited me to be his head of security, I was still working for the secret service. But he offered to pay me almost triple what I was making there, so the choice was easy. Bye bye, Washington.” 

Darcy blinks in surprise, “Wait, you used to be in the secret service?” 

Natasha just smirks, “I was. I used to be a part of the CIA, too. I’d tell you more, but you know what they say: I’d have to kill you.” She says it in such a dry tone that Darcy’s not sure wether or not she’s serious. Natasha laughs at the concerned look on her face. 

“Not to be rude, but you don’t look that old…” Darcy says, “And it sounds like you’ve done so much in your life already. That’s honestly amazing.” 

Natasha shrugs her shoulders, “I was born in Russia. They start you early over there. Anyway, Fenix is in her room. The little rugrat is probably still sleeping,” Natsha rolls her eyes, but Darcy can still sense the affection, “You’ll need to wake her up soon. I’ll be in my office for a few more minutes, but then I’m out for the day. If you don’t see Loki, it means he’s either out or in his recording studio. You might see the rest of house staff around - maids and gardeners - but otherwise, you have the house to yourself.”

Darcy smiles at Natasha, appreciative of the woman and everything she’s done for her so far, “Thank you so much.”

“Good luck, Darcy,” Natasha smiles back, pausing before she leaves, “Oh, and between you and me, you’re already miles ahead of the last nanny.”

Darcy beams at the compliment as Natasha leaves the room with a wink. Feeling reassured, Darcy flips open the manilla folder and reads through a few of the lines of information on the itinerary about Fenix. 

_Fenix Laufeyson - age 6._  
 _Black hair, green eyes._  
 _Bedtime: No later than 8 pm. Nap time: 1 to 2 pm._  
 _Allergies: None known._  
 _Bathing regimen: Must take a bath/shower every night. Be stingy with the bubble bath._  
 _Dietary restrictions: No soda, no gum. Must take a vitamin with every breakfast. A list of acceptable meals to prepare are in the kitchen next to the fridge. Absolutely NO sugar past 6 pm - impossible to get to bed otherwise._

Well, that’s good to know. Darcy makes a mental note to stash all the candy the first chance she gets - she doesn’t want a hyper-active kid bouncing off the walls like she’s on speed every night. Closing the folder, she tosses it on her bed and heads down the hall to Fenix’s room.

Like Natasha said, she’s still sacked out on top of her canopy bed. Her little limbs are strewn haphazardly across the mattress, and Darcy can’t help but think just how angelic she looks. She gently nudges Fenix’s shoulder, “Hey sweetie, time to wake up.” 

Fenix’s eyes shoot open, and from her mouth escapes the most aggravated and elongated groan Darcy has ever heard any six year old ever emit. Okay, so, maybe _not_ so angelic now. 

“Wake up, Fenix,” Darcy repeats herself after the little girl continues to lie there with her eyes forcibly shut, “You’ve got ballet class this morning!” 

“I don’t wannaaaa,” Fenix whines, flipping over onto her stomach and burying her face in the pillow. She is definitely not dealing with a morning person here. Noted. 

“What if I make breakfast for you?” Darcy tempts the little girl, kneeling by her bedside, “What’s your most favorite breakfast food in the entire world?” 

This causes Fenix to poke her head out of the pillow a little, her hair sticking out wildly around her face, “Chocolate chip pancakes.”

“You got it, dude,” Darcy says.

It still takes them about twenty minutes to get out of the bedroom, despite the breakfast deal. Darcy has trouble finding Fenix’s tutu and leotard, and meanwhile Fenix insists on wearing her swimsuit instead. Darcy has half a mind to give up and let her do it (it’s all just spandex, right?) before finally locating the leotard and shimmying the girl into it. 

Once in the kitchen, Fenix props herself up on the island barstool and yanks out a coloring book from a stack of magazines on the counter. Darcy is pulling the milk and eggs out of the fridge as she watches her, “Do you like to color?”

“Mhm,” Fenix says, her little tongue sticking out of her mouth as she reaches for a box of crayons. She leafs through her coloring book while Darcy turns on the stove and begins mixing the pancake batter. 

“What’s the best picture you’ve ever colored, hm?” Darcy asks after she’s done pouring the pancakes onto the griddle. 

Fenix thinks for a moment, and then flips through a few more pages. She stops on a page and holds it up in front of her face for Darcy to see. In the picture are two little stick figures: In typical little kid fashion, they’re standing outside, next to some flowers, a giant smiley sun hanging overhead. One is obviously Fenix, with her long black hair, bangs, and a wide smiley face. Her little stick figure is holding the hand of a taller man with the same color black hair and green eyes. Fenix points to the picture, “This is my favorite one I've ever done. It’s me and daddy.”

“That’s such a great picture, Fenix, I love it,” Darcy compliments the little girl, and she smiles in response. Darcy flips the pancakes, her back to Fenix as she says, “I bet your dad loves it, too.”

The response is a little delayed, causing Darcy to look over her shoulder. Fenix is pursing her lips, eyes cast down, “I…I haven’t shown him it yet.”

“Why’s that?”

“Daddy’s always so busy. He…he doesn’t like it when people bother him,” Fenix replies, and there’s a hint of sadness in her voice. Something about that doesn’t seem right to Darcy - no kid should be afraid of approaching their parents - especially if it’s to share something creative. It tugs on Darcy’s heartstrings.

“Well, I bet you anything he would _love_ to see your picture,” Darcy says, piling the pancakes onto a plate and turning off the stove. “We’ll show it to him the next time we see him, alright?”

A small smile creeps across Fenix’s face, and it melts Darcy’s heart. She really can be unbelievably precious. Darcy can’t imagine this child becoming too much for the last nanny to handle. 

“Alright Fenix, dig in,” Darcy says, placing the pancakes in front of the girl. Fenix glances from her coloring book over to the pancakes and makes a face. A face Darcy knows all too well from children. A face that means trouble.

“I don’t want these,” Fenix complains, shoving the plate aside, “I want waffles instead.”

Darcy glances anxiously to the clock on the stove, “Fenix, I don’t have time to make waffles. Your ballet class starts in a half hour. Maybe tomorrow, okay?”

“I don’t want waffles _tomorrow_ ,” Fenix says, her voice rising, “I want waffles now!”

Darcy opens her mouth to argue, but Fenix starts kicking her legs against the counter in a tantrum, throwing her arms across her chest and pouting. Okay, _now_ she might understand why the last nanny had her hands full. 

“Listen Fenix, I just made these pancakes for you, and if you don’t eat them, they’re going to go to waste,” Darcy yells over the obnoxious sound of Fenix’s kicks, but none of the logic resonates with the six year old. God, she was going to need an aspirin stat if she kept this up. 

“If you don’t make me waffles, I’m gunna scream!” Fenix says, her voice rising higher and higher, every syllable threatening to turn into the promised scream. By this point, it’s clear that it’s waffles or bust. Darcy groans loudly, bringing her hands down on the counter a little more forcefully than necessary. 

“Fine!” Darcy says in a huff, “Just - for the love of God - please don’t scream.” 

They’re late for Fenix’s ballet class. It doesn’t help that Darcy is practically in a sugar coma after consuming all of the chocolate chip pancakes that Fenix didn’t want after she made her waffles (but there was zero chance of her just throwing away perfectly good chocolate chip pancakes). 

When they pull up to the studio, Fenix bounces out of the car with boundless energy, leaving Darcy to sluggishly try and keep up with her. She wasn’t even halfway into day one, and already this child was finding countless ways to tire her out. Darcy grabs a suduko puzzle out of her glove compartment before shutting the door behind her and walking into the dance studio. 

Fenix joins her classmates inside the actual studio, which leaves Darcy the option of sitting in a side room to watch. There’s a gaggle of moms all sitting around in a circle chatting, each one of them cradling a Starbucks latte in their hands. A few of them eye Darcy as she stands awkwardly at the front of the room. She quickly pulls up a chair on the other side of the room, crosses her legs, whips out her suduko, and lets the hour of waiting begin.

It’s not long before she notices a weird vibe in the room. The women’s chatter had originally been quite loud, and Darcy had initially dismissed it as anything other than harmless mom gossip after catching a few key phrases such as “The line at Starbucks was a half hour long today, and then they didn’t even get my order right” and “I swear to God, Jeff was checking out the cashier at the store yesterday, but he won’t admit it.” 

But then they start talking in hushed tones. Darcy looks over and catches one of the women giving her a side-eye before looking away awkwardly. She looks back down at her sudoku puzzle, but her ears are wide open as she hones in on their conversation. When she hears the words “Loki Laufeyson,” she knows for sure they’re talking about her. 

Darcy puts down her sudoku and gives the moms her full attention, calling them out for gossiping about her. “Hey,” she says nicely, causing them all to all stop talking and look at her, “I’m Darcy Lewis. I’m Fenix’s nanny.”

One of the ladies with awfully highlighted blonde hair looks over at her with a sour expression, “Nanny? Is that what Laufeyson is calling it these days?”

A bunch of the moms snicker, and Darcy scrunches up her face in confusion, “I’m sorry, what?” 

“Oh, nothing,” the mom responds, looking Darcy up and down in a judgmental way, “You just seem a little young to be Loki’s girlfriend. Or whatever it is he calls you.” 

“I’m - I’m not - ” Darcy stutters, but it’s lost to the snickering women. Okay, _bitches_. She’d tried playing nice, but it obviously wasn’t working. She sets her mouth into a hard line and glares at the blonde woman, “I’m sorry you’re so insecure in your marriage that you have to tear other women down. I’m Fenix’s nanny, not Loki Laufeyson’s girlfriend. But even if I was, that’s still none of your business.” She pauses to steady herself, calming her voice down a little, “Oh, and Jeff is definitely cheating on you with the cashier from Whole Foods. Just from what I heard.” 

The blonde woman gasps a little, and Darcy can’t help the smug expression on her own face as she picks back up her puzzle without another word. It’s not long before the women go back to their gossip, but this time, at least, Darcy knows it’s not about her. 

When Fenix gets out of her class a few minutes later, its obvious that she’s been worn out, and for that, Darcy is grateful. As she straps her into the car, she crosses her fingers that nap time won’t be a hassle when they get home. 

Fenix is awfully quiet in the backseat, and Darcy can’t help but notice her change in demeanor. “Is everything alright?” She asks, glancing at her through the rear-view mirror. 

Fenix huffs out a tiny breath, looking out the window, “One of the girls was making fun of me today.”

 _Same here_ , Darcy thinks grimly, but pushes the thought aside, “That’s awful. Do you want to talk about it?”

Fenix just shrugs, her eyes downcast, “She made fun of me for not having a mom.” 

Ouch. What kind of a little kid could be so ruthless as to target the absence of someone's mom? Darcy wonders idly if the bully belonged to the bad-highlights gossip mom. Regardless, Darcy’s heart aches for the girl, noticing the way her tiny voice barely filled the car. She catches Fenix’s eyes in the mirror and gives her a sympathetic look, “But you have a dad who loves you very much.”

“I know,” Fenix says in a sad tone, “But sometimes I wish I had a mommy, too.”

Darcy doesn’t know what to say to that, so they ride the rest of the way home in silence, letting Fenix’s words hang in the air between them.

__________________________________

It’s sufficient to say that the rest of the week wears Darcy out. Come to find out, Fenix is an extraordinarily bright and creative little kid, but she is also incredibly spoiled. Between the art class and the dance class, trying to keep Fenix happy while still obeying all of rules in the itinerary, and dealing with frequent subsequent outbursts, Darcy is exhausted. By the time Thursday night rolls around, Darcy is ready to collapse in a heap in her bed before she drives back home in the morning.

She’s just finished bathing and tucking in Fenix for the night when she hears the soft melody of piano keys wafting up the stairs from the lounge. Curious, she heads towards the source of the music.

She pushes open the lounge door just a creak and sees Loki sitting at the piano with his back to her. She hasn’t seen him all week, so this is a surprise. The windows are cracked open, and a warm summer breeze blows through them and fills the room. There’s a wine bottle and an empty wine glass sitting on top of the piano as he lazily taps on a few keys, the noise still sounding incredibly soft and cohesive. 

Darcy decides to leave and give him some privacy, but without even turning around he calls out to her, “Miss Lewis. Come join me.”

Darcy freezes where she stands, but she doesn’t want to be rude - plus, a little part of her thrums with excitement at the fact that he was inviting her to come talk to him. She walks over to the piano, not sure whether to sit or stand, but he makes his intentions clear when he scoots over on the piano bench and pats the seat next to him. 

“Miss Darcy Lewis,” He repeats her name, almost as if he’s testing it out on his tongue, as she sits down next to him, “I’d offer you a glass of wine, but it appears I’ve already drunk it all.” 

That’s for damn sure. Darcy can smell the alcohol on him at her close proximity, but she keeps her mouth shut. She doesn’t want to offend him like she had the last time they talked. 

“Tell me, do you play the piano?” Loki asks, his fingers still tapping idly on the keys. Darcy is mesmerized by his long, slender fingers and the way they seem to effortlessly float across the keys to create a melody. 

She looks down at the piano and shrugs modestly, “I used to, back in grade school. I haven’t in a while.” She lets herself test out a few keys, mildly pleased with the resulting sound. Loki grins next to her, and she can’t help but notice the boyish quality to his face when he does. 

“Not bad,” He says, his voice low and impressed. Darcy blushes a little, instantly feeling the heat creep into her cheeks. Loki Laufeyson just told her that her music wasn’t bad. She’s _got_ to text Jane as soon as possible. 

“So tell me,” He says, looking over at her, “How was your first week with Fenix? Did she give you any trouble?” 

It takes everything in Darcy’s power not to bark out a sarcastic remark, so she lets herself laugh a little, “Uh, well, you could say that. There have been more than a few breakfast battles. We’re both still getting used to each other’s personalities, but so far, I’ve got to say, she’s growing on me.” Loki nods his head, pleased, as Darcy continues, “The dance moms at her ballet class have given me the most trouble, if anything.”

“Oh?” Loki asks, popping an inquisitive eyebrow. 

“Yeah, they were throwing shade about me being your young girlfriend or some shit,” Darcy admits, laughing nervously as she realizes what she’s saying, “They’re just a bunch of bitter, angry moms who don’t get enough sex and try to fill the void with gossip. They’re probably just jealous I work for you.” 

“My girlfriend, huh?” Loki asks, the timbre in his voice low and inquisitive, and to Darcy it almost sounds like he’s picturing the idea of it. It makes the blush on her cheeks grow even redder. So much for keeping that filter between her mind and mouth shut. 

“I know, pretty ridiculous, right?” Darcy forces out more awkward laughter, trying to ease the embarrassment of the situation. She can tell he’s looking at her, but she keeps her eyes strictly on the piano keys. 

“Is it?” Loki asks, and Darcy’s head whips up. His eyes are bright and thoughtful looking, and his cheeks are flushed with the warmth from the alcohol. She knows he’s drunk, but it still doesn’t stop her heart rate from increasing exponentially in her chest at his question. He meets her gaze as he asks slowly, “Don’t you think I’m handsome, Miss Lewis?” 

“No!” Darcy says too quickly, before trying to backtrack, “I mean, yes! But, no, I’m not - we’re not - that would be, uh - ”

A grin spreads across Loki’s face as he watches her fumble over her words, trying to save herself. He lets out a throaty, amused laugh as he stands up from the piano bench, grabbing his empty glass and wine bottle, “Goodnight, Miss Lewis.” 

He saunters out of the room, still smiling to himself as he goes. And Darcy sits on that piano bench much, much longer than she should have, letting out a long and winded breath. She can’t believe that just happened. A mix of embarrassment and disbelief flood her system. She knows he had been pretty drunk, but that still doesn’t stop her from considering the absurd possibility of what just happened.

Did Loki Laufeyson - _thee_ Loki Laufeyson - just flirt…with _her_?


	5. Deflated Balloons

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I need to take a time out here and say one massive, collective THANK YOU to all of you lovely readers, both here and on my tumblr. All of your messages about my story seriously make my whole day and inspire me to write more. Thanks so much for all your love and support so far! 
> 
> Now, onto the story. This chapter introduces a bunch of new characters! (Woo!) Enjoy.

“Would you like to order another drink, ma’am?”

The waitress hovers over Darcy’s table, taking note of the margarita she’d already sucked dry. Darcy looks from the empty seat across from her and then back up to the waitress. 

“I’m fine for now. Maybe just some water? My friend will be here any minute, I promise.”

The waitress nods politely, but Darcy can see she’s a little tense about the fact that Darcy’s taking up a whole table to herself on this busy Friday night. Darcy shoots a quick text to Jane, warning her if she doesn’t get here soon there is a chance of eviction. Then she scrolls through the rest of her contacts, finally landing on the one she wants and clicking a new message box open. 

Darcy, 9:46 pm: _So, guess who just finished their first week of work for the one and only Loki Laufeyson?_

Her phone buzzes back with a response before she even has a chance to put it back on the table. That was Tony Stark alright. Never caught dead away from his electronics. 

Tony, 9:46 pm: _I’m going to take a stab in the dark and guess you. Congrats, kiddo! I would say you owe me big for hooking you up with the sweetest nannying gig of the century, but you can consider it a graduation present._

Darcy, 9:48 pm: _Har har. Seriously, I can’t believe you never told me you knew Loki Laufeyson - of Odinson brothers fame. Is there anyone you don’t know?_

Tony, 9:49 pm: _Doubtful, but you can try me._

Darcy initially dismisses his response as a joke, and it probably is, but then a thought strikes her. Quickly, she texts back her question.

Darcy, 9:51 pm: _What about Thor Odinson?_

Tony, 9:52 pm: _I know him through a friend of a friend of a friend. Not nearly as well as Loki. Should I be concerned you’re asking this?_

Darcy, 9:53 pm: _Just wondering what happened between them that caused the band to break up._

Tony, 9:54 pm: _Sweetheart, that is one mystery even I don’t know the half of._

Darcy is considering what she wants to type back when there is a sudden rush of movement and a person slides into the seat across from her. Darcy puts her phone down and looks up to see a panting, out of breath Jane.

“Did you have to pick _this_ bar, really?” Jane asks, still trying to catch her breath as she shrugs her purse off her shoulders, “I mean, the parking was awful!” 

Darcy narrows her eyes playfully, “Don’t you lie to me Jane Foster. I know the reason you’re late is because you couldn’t tear yourself away from your one true love.” She taps her fingers on the table as she begins to sing, “Jane and Science sittin’ in a tree - ”

Jane groans, “Alright, alright, alright, fine, you caught me.” The waitress is quick to pop by their table and Jane orders two more margaritas, one for her and one for Darcy. When she finishes ordering, she looks back over at Darcy and the ‘got ya’ look on her face. 

“Jane, serious question time,” Darcy says, leaning across the table and crossing her arms, “When was the last time you got laid?” 

“I am - that is not - ” Jane stammers before regaining her composure, “We’re here to talk about how your job went this week, not my sex life!” 

“Just answer the question, and then we can move on to my nanny escapades,” Darcy replies smugly.

Jane purses her lips, her eyebrows raised, “When was the last time _you_ got laid?”

Darcy laughs, “Jane Foster…playing hardball. Touché.” The waitress comes with their drinks, and Darcy takes a long sip of hers before looking back up, “You know I haven’t had a boyfriend in a while. But I haven’t had a hookup in a while either. So you got me there. But the point is not me, it’s you. I’m making it my mission to find you a guy this summer.”

Jane just sighs, trying to hide the smile on her face, “You do that, Darcy.”

__________________________________

Darcy decides that she likes taking Fenix to her art class a thousand times more than she does her dance lessons. For one thing, there’s no herd of obnoxious, gossipy moms all huddled together (although, ever since Darcy had told them off, they’d been pretty good about keeping their mouths shut about her). The other reason she prefers the art class is because they leave out a tray of cookies for the parents to snack on while they wait for their kids.

Darcy is piling up on peanut butter cookies (she figures she might as well take some home in her purse if they’re free for the taking) when she turns around and accidentally knocks into another person. Another person holding coffee. Another person holding coffee which manages to splash onto the sleeve of his shirt. Which just so happens to be military attire. Great.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry!” Darcy gasps, wheeling around to grab some napkins, “Did I burn you?”

“No, you’re fine!” The man says, grabbing some napkins for himself, “It’s not a big deal at all, really.” 

Darcy takes a step back and looks up at the stranger - he’s easily a whole foot taller than she is. With soft blonde hair, blue eyes and an easy smile, he looks like he could he could be the poster child for the all-American male. “Steve Rogers,” He says politely, extending a hand to introduce himself. 

“Darcy Lewis,” She says and shakes his hand, grateful that he wasn’t angry about the coffee spill. She looks at the patches on his uniform, “You active duty?”

“That I am,” Steve replies, the grin on his face seemingly irreplaceable. He was like a puppy in human form. “Captain Steve Rogers, at your service, ma’am.”

Darcy grins back, “Captain, huh? What brings you to the war zone that is the Little Picasso Art Institute? I don’t think I've seen you here before.” 

“My daughter’s in the class,” He says, nodding his head towards the art studio door, “My ex-wife usually picks her up, but every few weeks I come home from base to visit my little girl. Do you have a child in the class?”

Darcy opens her purse and shows him the stolen cookies, “Nah, I just come here for the free food.” Steve gives her an unsure look, so Darcy laughs a little before explaining. “I’m totally kidding. Yeah, I have a kid in the class. Well, she’s not _my_ kid. I’m her nanny.” 

The doors to the art studio open, and a flood of little kids holding their creations come rushing out to find their parents. No sign of Fenix yet, but a little blonde girl comes bouncing out and wraps her arms around Steve’s legs.

“I should get in there and find her,” Darcy explains, jerking her thumb in the direction of the art studio, “Sorry again about the coffee.” 

“Don’t worry about it,” Steve says, a small grin on his face as he grabs his daughter’s hand and starts to walk out, “Maybe you can buy me another one to make up for it sometime.” 

Darcy blinks in surprise, but smiles at the handsome soldier nonetheless as he turns to leave. _Well_ , then. That’s always a great way to start out the day. 

As soon as Darcy walks into the art studio, Fenix comes rushing up to her, “Darcy! Darcy! Guess what! I’m going to be in an art show!” 

“Whaaat?!” Darcy says, giving the little girl a high-five, “That’s awesome sauce, girlfriend! I'm so proud of you!” 

The art teacher overhears them talking from where she’s wiping down the desks and walks over to introduce herself, “Hi there, I’m Fenix’s teacher, Mrs. Smith. Are you her mother?”

“Oh, uh, no. Just the nanny,” Darcy explains as Fenix runs over to her desk and starts packing up her stuff, “My name’s Darcy.”

“Well, it’s nice to meet you, Darcy,” Mrs. Smith says warmly, “I was going to talk to you about the art show but it looks like Fenix beat me to it. She’s an incredibly talented student - her concept of shapes is more advanced than a lot of kids her age. We host an art show at the end of the summer - of course, all of our students participate, but I was considering Fenix as a contributor to our main showcase.”

“Wow, that’s incredible,” Darcy says, impressed. In the background, Fenix pumps her little fist into the air as she listens to their conversation, and it causes Darcy to laugh. 

“I’ve asked her to work on a piece at home throughout the summer,” The teacher explains, “It can be anything she wants. I just wanted to let you know. Just make sure she doesn’t forget about it!”

“Oh, I don’t think that will be a problem,” Darcy says as Fenix straps on her bag and comes to stand by her. Darcy ruffles her hair with her hand, “This little peanut is always busy drawing something.”

“Hey,” Fenix says pointedly, crossing her arms over her chest, “I am not a peanut.”

“It’s a compliment; it means I think you’re cute,” Darcy explains, and Fenix’s expression softens a little as a small smile spreads across her face. The rest of the day, Fenix won't stop talking about her upcoming art project. It’s the happiest Darcy has seen her yet.

__________________________________

Early Thursday morning, Darcy wakes up to the unmistakable sound of a lawnmower roaring to life right outside of her window. Groggily, she rubs her eyes, wondering why in the name of all things holy and unholy, someone has chosen to mow the lawn at such an ungodly hour. Usually the lawn crew works on the weekends when she’s not around. She rolls out of bed, not even bothering to change out of her spaghetti-strap camisole and boxer shorts, and she heads downstairs to find out what was going on.

As soon as she passes through down the back stairwell into the kitchen, she immediately regrets her wardrobe choice. The glass doors to the back lawn are wide open, and workmen carrying tables and chairs are passing in and out. Now that she’s paying attention, she can hear the voices of numerous people floating throughout the house. Meanwhile, a team of chefs in the kitchen are all chopping up produce and preparing various other foods. 

Darcy folds her arms over her chest, feeling a little more exposed than she’d like, and steps out onto the patio in the backyard. She spots her lawnmower culprit almost immediately, but before she can go over and say anything, a set of familiar voices approach behind her. 

“…and the guest list is all approved.” Natasha is saying as Darcy turns around. Both she and Loki are walking up behind her, Natasha with her trusty tablet in hand. And both are fully dressed, making Darcy wish for the umpteenth time she had changed into something else. Her hair is falling down to her shoulders in wild curls, and she tries to smooth them out as the pair approaches. 

“Hey, yeah, hi,” Darcy says, cursing the way her voice still sounds full of sleep, “Can anyone tell me what’s going on here? I was upstairs trying to sleep when the sound of a lawnmower cut into my dreams. No pun intended.” 

Loki looks her up and down, regarding her choice of clothes with an amused grin before addressing her in a curious tone, “Did no one tell you? I’m hosting a party tonight.” 

Darcy’s eyes widen, “Um, no, this is news to me. Is it your birthday? Is it Fenix’s birthday? Oh god, I have no idea when her birthday is. If today’s her birthday - ”

Loki holds up a hand to cut off her rambling, “No, it’s not Fenix’s birthday. Or my own.”

“Oh,” Darcy says, clamping her mouth shut before she asks her next question, “Then why the party?”

Natasha looks up at Loki with a smug expression as she explains to Darcy what’s going on. “Because he’s rich, and throwing extravagant parties for no reason is just what rockstars _do_ ,” She says, clearly making fun of him in her dry, sarcastic tone. Loki makes a gesture like he can’t argue. 

“I apologize that no one gave you forewarning of this event,” Loki says, directing his gaze at Darcy, “But if you wouldn’t mind taking Fenix out today, that would be lovely. Probably best to skip the nap, too. Trust me, you’ll want her nice and tired tonight so she can sleep through this madness.” 

“You got it, boss,” Darcy says, rolling with the punches as she gives him a little salute. Living with a rockstar was going to come with some unexpected curveballs, and if wild mansion parties just happened to be one of them, then she could definitely learn to deal with it.

__________________________________

Nope. Darcy was definitely, _definitely_ not handling the wild mansion party curveball well. Of course, after a whole day spent at the park and the zoo with Fenix, the little girl was sacked out cold before they even got home. Darcy only wished she could do the same.

After what feels like days of tossing and turning in her bed (but what really only equated to an hour), she groans loudly as she looks up at the ceiling. The backyard was right outside her window, so the voices of all the party goers created a loud and annoying ambience that was proving impossible to sleep to. 

Darcy glances over and checks the time on her iPhone. Only 11:30 pm. But that’s when the sound of guitars and a piano kick up from somewhere downstairs, and Darcy groans all over again, sticking the pillow over her face in her irritation. There’s definitely not going to be any sleeping tonight.

With this pretty firmly decided in her mind, Darcy resolves that she’s going to at least finish _House of Cards_ season 2 on Netflix. Might as well not let all that non-sleeping time go to waste. 

As she lets the video load on her laptop, she decides she needs some alcohol to complete the viewing experience. And she knows exactly where in the kitchen the secret stash is. Darcy pushes herself out of bed, throwing on an oversized sweatshirt from college on top of a pair of shorts. She hopes she can just slip in and out of the party scene undetected, but just in case, this outfit is at least more modest than the one she was caught wearing in the morning. 

Cautiously, she makes her way down the back stairwell. Just as she had hoped, the crowd of people milling around were far too drunk and absorbed in conversation to pay any attention to her. She’s literally two footsteps away from the wine cabinet when a voice from behind startles her. 

“Miss Lewis!” 

Damn.

It’s Loki, swaggering up to her with a wine glass in his hand, and he gestures towards her sweatshirt, “I might be a little inebriated at the moment, but _that_ does not look like the right outfit for a party, wouldn’t you agree?”

Darcy looks down at her clothes and then back up at Loki, who is dressed in a tight black leather jacket, pants, and a dark green undershirt. She can’t help herself from letting her gaze linger longer on him than normal - all the dark clothing causes his green eyes to pop, making him even more attractive than usual. He’s definitely rocking that rock god look he had come to personally coin, and Darcy winces at herself in comparison, “I…didn’t know I was invited?”

“Of course you’re invited,” Loki says like it’s obvious, handing her his wine glass, which she takes with speculation. His eyes seem bright and attentive as he holds her gaze. “In fact,” Loki says, looping his arm through hers, “You’re my guest of honor.” 

He looks down and smiles warmly at her, and it actually makes her heart skip a beat. His mouth crinkles around the edges as he grins, and he seems so open and sincere that Darcy can’t help but smile back. 

Loki walks with her through the crowds of people, out into the backyard garden. Out here, people are mingling and dancing and talking and drinking under the stars, and somehow the night seems so young whereas only moments ago, it had not. Darcy breathes in heavily, noticing just how amazing Loki smells - like a mix of leather and mint and cold air, if that was even possible. All around them, people look up and pat him on the shoulder as he passes by, truly the focal point of the party. And for a split second, Darcy forgets she’s not wearing anything half as nice as the people around her. Because _Loki Laufeyson_ has his arm around hers. 

“Over here,” Loki says, leaning down to whisper in her ear. A rush of goosebumps trail down her neck at the sensation of his breath on her skin. “There are some people I’d like you to meet.” 

There's a giddy smile on Darcy's face, and she feels like she's already drunk even though she hasn't had a sip. It must be Loki's attitude rubbing off on her; it's infectious. He's almost a completely different person right now - hadn't it only been a few weeks ago when he was demanding she stay out of his private life? And now, here he his, dragging her through his party to meet people. Darcy's definitely not complaining. 

Darcy notices Natasha with her back to them as they approach a group of people - recognizable by her fiery red hair and hourglass silhouette in her party dress. Next to her stand another woman and man. Loki strolls up to the group, making room for the two of them in the circle of conversation. 

He clears his throat as he releases Darcy from his grasp, “Everyone: meet Darcy Lewis. Darcy Lewis: meet everyone. Everyone but you that is, Natasha.”

Natasha rolls her eyes at him, a hand on her hip. She looks at Darcy with a kind smile, “Hey. I didn’t know you were showing up tonight.”

Darcy looks down at her baggy sweatshirt again and then back up at Natasha, “Obviously, neither did I.” 

This earns an honest laugh from the man at Natasha’s side. He’s got shaggy, dirty blonde hair, and bit of rugged stubble. She can see veins of his arms muscles flex as he crosses his arms, a beer in hand. He looks a little older than Natasha, like he might be in his late thirties, but ruggedly handsome nonetheless. Darcy gets a familiar vibe from him, but she can’t quite place it. Natasha looks between the two of them and says, “Darcy, this is my boyfriend, Clint Barton. Clint, this is Darcy, the girl I was telling you about.”

Darcy’s mouth pops open in recognition, “Of course! You’re Clint Barton! Like…the Clint Barton who swept all of the gold medals in archery in the Olympics last year. Dude, you are amazing. You made me actually care about the sport. You like, single-handedly made bows and arrows cool again.” 

Clint laughs politely, scratching the back of his head in a humble gesture, “Thanks. It’s nice to meet you too. Nat’s said only great things. And believe me, for her, that can be difficult.” 

Natasha playfully jabs him in the side while the woman on the other side of Loki makes a not so subtle coughing noise. She’s beyond supermodel gorgeous, like staring-into-the-sun stunning. She has wavy golden hair and tanned skin, and the matching golden dress she’s wearing is low-cut and form-fitting. Darcy looks over just in time to see her loop her arm through Loki’s, intertwining their fingers where their hands meet. Oh.

“Funny…” The woman says in a voice that doesn’t indicate anything humorous at all, “Loki, you haven’t told me _anything_ about Darcy Lewis.” She tilts her head in curiosity, shooting Darcy a cool gaze, “Who are you, exactly?” 

Suddenly, Darcy feels extremely self-conscious under her stare. She opens her mouth to respond, but Loki beats her to it, “Darling, this is Fenix’s new nanny. I’m sure I’ve mentioned it.” 

“Hmm, no,” The woman says, extending her free hand for Darcy to shake. To Darcy, it looks like she’s a queen being forced to reach out and touch a peasant. It’s instantly off-putting, but Darcy doesn’t want to be rude, so she takes her hand anyway as the woman introduces herself, “I’m Sigyn. Loki’s girlfriend.” 

Of course. Darcy feels like she should have seen this coming by the way they were touching...so why does she suddenly feel like she’s a balloon that’s slowly losing air? Maybe it’s because Sigyn looks like she has the personality of a sour grape, and Darcy knows Loki could probably do better if he tried. But it’s not like Darcy has any type of romantic feelings for Loki anyway…and he definitely doesn’t have any feelings for her. So why should she care? Everything that has happened between them up until this point has obviously been nothing more than a friendly, professional relationship. The way it should be. 

“Nice to meet you,” Darcy says, forcing a smile back up onto her face. Sigyn rests her head on Loki’s shoulder, and he kisses the top of her head. It makes Darcy’s stomach lurch slightly, and she hates that it does. “Anyway, I should get back to bed, I’ve had a long day.” 

“But you’ve only just arrived!” Loki complains, and Darcy can hear him slur his words slightly. Yep. Definitely drunk. Darcy tips her wine glass up in a toast - the same wine glass that he had given her earlier in the kitchen - and downs the whole thing in one gulp. Next to her, Clint claps and cheers her on. 

“Sorry,” Darcy says after swallowing, her voice falling just a little flat as she sets down the wine glass on a nearby table, “Thanks for that, though.”

She turns away before she can see the disappointed look on Loki’s face.


	6. Triple the Dosage

Last night had been…weird.

At least, that’s Darcy’s first thought when she wakes up in the morning. Instantly, her mind flashes back to the way Loki had been so inclusive and gentle, grabbing her arm and leading her through the party. He was much more different under the influence of alcohol, that was for sure.

And then there was Sigyn. The way she’d introduced herself - the way she’d called herself his _girlfriend_ like Darcy was some kind of threat - had definitely been weird. There’s a tiny voice in the back of Darcy’s head that cringes at the thought of the two of them together. Is it jealousy? She really has no reason to be jealous of anything, at all. It’s not like Loki’s shown any outright interest in her romantically, or vise versa. Yeah, maybe he had been a little suggestive that night at the piano. And then again with the way he looked at her, smiling as he took her arm last night. The way his breath tickled her ear, giving her shivers. Oh god, and the way he smelled, like leather and -

Darcy stops herself, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. No. He has a girlfriend. And Darcy definitely does not have feelings for Loki.

She gets showered and dressed for the day before going to wake Fenix up. To her surprise, the little girl is already wide awake, sprawled out on the floor in her pajamas still. She’s got a big poster board in front of her, and there are piles of markers, crayons, and paints piled up next to her.

“Well, well, well, you’re up early,” Darcy greets the little girl with surprise in her voice. Fenix turns to look at Darcy, and she’s got a streak of blue marker across her chin.

“No, no!” Fenix warns, waving her hand, “You can’t see this! I’m working on my art project, it’s going to be a surprise.”

Darcy grins, holding up her hands in surrender, “I won’t look, promise. You must be pretty excited about it if you’re working on it already.” 

“Mmhmm,” Fenix mumbles, and Darcy can hear the squeak of marker on the poster board. The little girl is so involved in what she’s doing, Darcy would hate to tear her away. She decides to let her keep doing her thing and bring her breakfast up to her room for a treat.

“I’ll be right back, Fenix,” Darcy says, “We can have breakfast in bed this morning.”

The little girl cheers as Darcy leaves her doorway, heading down towards the kitchen. There’s still party debris everywhere, looking like a tornado had ripped through everything in its wake. She’s not surprised - somehow she’d managed to fall asleep as the party thumped on around her into the wee hours of the night.

Darcy steps over crumpled cups, feeling like she’s back in a frat house for a second, before making her way to the fridge. She’s just started pouring orange juice into a cup for Fenix when she hears a groan coming from the kitchen table, and she jumps. Loki is sitting there, his elbow on top of the newspaper and chin resting in the palm of his hand, with a cup of coffee steaming in his other hand. 

“Jesus, you scared me,” Darcy breathes, placing one hand on her chest. “I didn’t see you there.” 

“My apologies,” Loki says slowly, each syllable sounding like a struggle. He picks up his face to look at her, his eyes heavy from his hangover, and yawns. He runs a hand through his long black hair, pushing it out of his face. 

“You don’t look so hot,” Darcy comments, unable to help herself from being forward. If she really wanted to throw him a dig, she’d say he looked like shit. 

“Thanks,” He grumbles into the palm of his hand. 

Darcy is popping some bread in the toaster for Fenix, her back to Loki. She has a feeling he’d rather sit alone, in the dark, in silence, but she doesn’t care. She’s not sure if it’s because she harbors some kind of irrational bitterness over last night - the way he’d made her feel so special before dropping a bomb and introducing her to his girlfriend - but she keeps talking anyway, “I’ve been meaning to talk to you about Fenix, actually. Her art teacher selected her to create a piece for the art showcase at the end of the summer.” 

“Did she?” Loki says, his voice lacking the right amount of luster and the passion to continue the conversation. He rubs his temple with two fingers, his eyes shut in concentration. Darcy side-eyes him really heavily, but she can’t help it. 

“She did,” Darcy continues lively, plucking out the toast and grabbing some jelly from the fridge, “Have you ever actually seen any of Fenix’s artwork? She’s super talented.” 

“Are you insinuating I don’t support my daughter’s creative endeavors?” Loki replies, setting his jaw into a hard line. He sits up a little straighter in his chair, more attentive now, and Darcy continues to innocently spread the jelly onto the toast without looking at him. 

“Me? No. That would be out of line,” Darcy replies, and she worries her voice is a little too sarcastic, but in Loki’s state, he doesn’t seem to catch it. “You should come to the art show, though. It’s August first. Still about two months away, but I want to make sure you’ll have it open. Fenix would love to see you there.”

“Alright. I’ll see if I’m available that day,” Loki mumbles, leaning back into his chair. He watches as Darcy turns on her heel, grabbing something out of a cabinet and slamming it shut. He winces at the sound.

“Good,” Darcy says, grabbing Fenix’s breakfast and marching past him. She tosses three aspirins onto the table as she passes, which land haphazardly on top of his newspaper. Under her breath she mumbles, “You better be.”

__________________________________

“So, Fenix, what do you like to do when you hang out with your dad?” Darcy asks, leaning back in Fenix’s bed and watching as she colors on the other side of the room. Fenix was silently munching on her toast in one hand, a crayon in the other.

“Hmm,” Fenix makes a tiny noise, thinking it over, “Well, sometimes he’ll take me to the store and let me buy whatever I want. That’s pretty fun.”

“That’s nice of him,” Darcy says. She can’t help but notice it doesn’t really consist of a bonding activity, though. More and more she gets the impression that Fenix and Loki don’t spend nearly enough time together as they should. Obviously they must see each other on the weekends, but she’s never around, so she’s not sure how much time that actually consists of. She knows it really shouldn’t be any of her business to meddle in their affairs, but every day she spends with the kid, the more her heart grows fonder of her. 

Darcy watches Fenix color, her little face scrunched up in concentration, and she asks, “Do you do anything else with him?”

“Um, sometimes,” Fenix replies, still doodling, “Not really. Daddy is really busy with his music. I think he wants to play again in front of people some day. He’s been practicing a lot.”

Darcy tilts her head to the side, considering something, “Fenix, do you know a man named Thor?”

Fenix pokes her head up and looks over to Darcy, “Who?”

So, that was a no then. Darcy doesn’t want to be the one to reveal to the little girl that she has a secret uncle, so she lets the topic slide for now. “Nevermind. Have you heard your dad play music before?” 

“Yeah, he’s really good,” Fenix says, and Darcy makes a noise of agreement. Fenix sets down her marker and gives Darcy her full attention, “I wish I could play an instrument like daddy.”

An idea strikes Darcy, “I play the piano. Not as well as your dad, but I can teach you if you’d like?” 

Fenix’s face lights up, “Really?”

“Really,” Darcy says with a smile, and the little girl drops everything as she rushes over to her. She jumps into Darcy’s lap with a thump, throwing her arms around her neck, and Darcy grins at the little ball of enthusiasm in front of her.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you!” The little girl chants over and over again with excitement, “I can’t wait to show daddy what I learn.”

“No problem, peanut,” Darcy says, trying to wiggle out of the mess of Fenix’s hair that was smothering her face, “But I can’t breathe!” Fenix giggles and hugs her tighter, and Darcy can’t help but laugh and throw her arms around the girl as she squeezes her back.

__________________________________

On her way out later that morning, Darcy walks past Natasha’s office on the east side of the house, noticing her door is cracked open a bit. Darcy takes it as an invitation to enter. She walks in and sees Natasha with her feet kicked up on a desk in front of a huge display of keyboards and monitors. On them show security feed from the cameras around the house, along with feeds from places Darcy doesn’t recognize. A few web pages are up also, but they’re filled with computer code. It all looks very double-o-seven.

“Hey,” Darcy knocks on the doorframe. Natasha’s got her tablet in her lap, chewing on the top of a pen, and looks up at Darcy with a smile.

“Hey, come on in,” Natasha greets her, swinging her feet off the desk and opening up a place for Darcy to sit. 

“Looks like you recover from party mode better than the prince of rock and roll does,” Darcy says, nodding at Natasha’s awake and attentive appearance, showered and dressed in nice black slacks and a black blazer. She hoists herself up on top of the table where Natasha’s feet had just been.

“Russian, remember?” Natasha says with a smirk, “Loki doesn’t throw blowouts like that often, but when he does, he goes all out. Did you enjoy yourself?”

Darcy shrugs, not sure how much she wants to divulge to Natasha about the conflicting emotions she’s struggling with, “I mean…I wasn’t there for very long. Just long enough to meet Clint and Sigyn.” Darcy winces a little at the mention of Sigyn, but she hopes Natasha hadn’t noticed. “Clint seems amazing. How long have you guys been together?”

Natasha actually blushes a little, surprising Darcy, “A long time. We’ve known each other for forever, but we only started dating about four years ago.”

“What about…” Darcy trails off, gesturing with her left hand and wiggling her ring finger, “Have you guys talked about it? I mean, four years is a pretty long time.” 

“Maybe one day,” Natasha says, and by the tone of her voice, Darcy gets the feeling she’s trying to be humble and playing down her hopefulness. It was actually really cute. 

“So, what about Sigyn and Loki?” Darcy asks, trying to come across as indifferent and aloof. She picks at a cuticle on her nail, “What’s their story?”

She looks up in time to catch Natasha’s eye roll, “Sigyn and Loki. If there was ever an award for the most frustrating couple of all time, they’d win it.” Darcy looks at her with a confused expression, prompting Natasha to continue, “They’re on and off again so frequently, even I have trouble keeping track of it. One minute, they’re ‘taking time apart,’ and the next minute they’re sickeningly ‘in love.’”

“Oh,” Darcy says, registering the information. The way she’d seen them interacting last night, she’d figured they were a flawless couple. Maybe she was wrong. “How long have they been that way?”

“For as long as I can remember, really,” Natasha offers up vaguely.

Another question falls on the tip of Darcy’s tongue. It's one that had been lingering in the back of her mind, but that she was afraid to know the answer to. Now seems as good a time as any to ask it though. She takes a subtly deep breath and looks at Natasha, “So…is Sigyn Fenix’s mother?”

Natasha bursts out laughing, having to cover her mouth with the palm of her hand, “No way. Sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh that hard. Sigyn may be a lot of things,” Natasha says with a hint of distaste, “But she’s definitely not Fenix’s mother.” 

Darcy exhales slightly. Thank god. She’s not sure how well she’d be able to handle knowing that Sigyn and Fenix were mother and daughter. But that still doesn’t answer the question of the mysteriously absent mother. Darcy decides to try and push her luck with Natasha, “If she’s not, then who is? If you don’t mind me asking.”

The smile slowly fades from Natasha’s face as Darcy speaks. She regains her composure and looks at Darcy with more seriousness and professionalism, “Look, Darcy. I like you. I like talking to you. I don’t have many friends, but I’d like to consider us to be pretty close.” Darcy smiles slightly at Natasha, waiting for the inevitable ‘but’ she knows is coming. “But I still work for Loki first. And he values his privacy above almost everything else.”

Natasha takes a deep breath before continuing, “I’m one of the few people who know about Fenix’s mother. The fact that nobody else does is the reason I’m so good at my job.”

So that explains why Darcy hadn’t been able to find anything online about Fenix or her mother. Natasha really was a stealth expert. Still, Darcy doesn’t understand why it’s so shrouded in mystery. 

“I’m sorry I can’t tell you more,” Natasha offers up, and she truly does look apologetic, “Not even Clint knows, if that makes you feel any better.”

“It’s fine, you’ve told me more than enough! I don’t wanna cost you your job or anything,” Darcy smiles understandingly, deciding to accept the information she has for now - she doesn’t want to push Natasha too far. She hops off the desk and throws her purse back over her shoulder. On her way out, Darcy pauses with one hand on the doorframe of Natasha’s office, looking back before she goes.

“Oh, and Natasha?”

“Yes?”

“I’m glad we’re friends, too.”


	7. A Case of the Blues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seriously, thank you guys so much for your love on this story. I'm really trying to pace myself with it and take my time, but I promise all your burning questions will eventually be answered! I'm having so much fun writing it, and I love to hear that you're all enjoying it as much as I am. Without further adieu, on to chapter seven!

Fenix throws her hands down on the piano, creating a cacophony of loud sounds all around them. She groans and whines, pulling her tiny legs up to her chest, “I’m awful!”

“Fenix, we’ve only been practicing for five minutes.”

“Well, I’m bad and it sounds awful!”

Darcy takes a deep breath, not really wanting to deal with a temper tantrum this early in the day. Before she and Fenix had come to sit down at the piano, Darcy had shown her the basics up in her room. She’d drawn a little diagram of the keys on the piano, pointing out what notes corresponded to which keys, and how the black keys worked. Fenix had been very receptive then, but now she was on the verge of a meltdown, her impatience getting the better of her.

“Listen, Fenix, piano took me a really long time to learn how to play,” Darcy says, coming in with a softer, more relatable approach, “I still mess up all the time. But it’s important to not get mad at yourself and give up so easily. The more you practice, the better you’ll sound.”

“You really think so?” The little girl says, lifting her chin up and looking at Darcy.

“I know so,” Darcy says, wrapping her arm around the little girl, pulling her in close for a side hug, “That’s how everybody learns. It’s how I learned. It’s how Mozart learned. It’s even how your dad learned. And if he can do it, so can you.”

A little smile creeps across Fenix’s face, and she bites her lip in the most adorable fashion, “Okay.”

Darcy guides the girl’s fingers across the piano, playing a simple melody. She has Fenix repeat it over and over again, reciting the names of the notes, until moving on to a different melody. By the end of the afternoon, Darcy is shocked by how quickly Fenix is learning after their initial setback. They’d moved on from melodies to entire phrases, and Fenix grins with determination as she taps away on the keys. It’s clear to Darcy that Fenix is another musical prodigy, just like her father. 

“Good work today, peanut,” Darcy says after they finish their last exercise, “You’re already playing better than me, and it’s only been a few hours.” 

Fenix’s grin takes up her whole face, “When can I show daddy? I want to put on a concert for him.”

Darcy tilts her head to the side, considering it, “That’s a really great idea. How about we pick a song and practice it for the rest of the week, and then we can play it for your dad on Thursday. How’s that sound?"

Fenix’s response is a very loud and exuberant cheer followed by: “I can even make him an invitation for it and everything. I’m so excited!” 

Darcy rubs the little girl’s back supportingly. This actually wasn’t a bad idea - it brings Loki and Fenix together over an activity of hers that he can relate to and be proud of. Darcy herself is especially feeling a sense of accomplishment at the thought of spurring on upcoming the father/daughter connection. Might as well just call her Suppernanny. 

“You hungry?” Darcy asks as they get off the piano bench, and Fenix nods her head, “Good. Let’s go get some ice cream. You earned it.” 

Fenix stares at her with wide eyes, “But my last nanny never let me have ice cream. She said it was bad for me.”

Darcy pretends to look around the corners and under the couches, “Well, I don’t see your old nanny anywhere around here, do you?” Fenix giggles, shaking her head no.

Darcy smiles, ruffling the girl’s hair as she snatches her purse up off the couch, her car keys jangling in her hand, “Fenix, if you listen to just one piece of advice I give, let it be this: when you want ice cream, go eat ice cream.”

__________________________________

On Thursday night, Darcy helps Fenix get bathed and ready for her big piano concert. They go through Fenix’s wardrobe and Darcy lets the girl pick out any fancy outfit she wants. She settles on an adorable little green dress, and Darcy braids her hair and puts in a headband to match.

“What about you, Darcy?” Fenix asks once she’s all dressed and standing in front of her bedroom mirror, “You have to dress up, too.”

“But I’m not the star of the show, you are!” Darcy argues gently with her.

“Well, we put ‘fancy dress clothes’ on daddy’s invitation,” Fenix says, holding up the little piece of paper she had designed earlier and pointing to it, “And that means everyone, including you!”

Darcy sighs, smiling at her. She was too cute to argue with, and she did make a valid point. Darcy wonders smugly if she was rubbing off more on the little girl than she realized. “Alright, alright. Let’s go pick out a dress for me to wear.” 

Fenix decides on a simple summer dress from Darcy’s closet (Darcy hadn’t brought too many fancy dresses to begin with, anyway). It’s dark purple and sleeveless, tight around her bodice with a flowing skirt that ends just above her knees. Thankfully, it’s one of her more modest dresses. She’s not sure how comfortable she’d be rocking a dress to a child’s piano recital that was any more low cut than this one was. Fenix smiles approvingly after Darcy comes out of the bathroom, modeling it with a little twirl in front of her. 

“Now let’s go give daddy his invitation!” Fenix says, hopping off Darcy’s bed with excitement. They’d already made sure Loki was home earlier in the day. Then, Fenix had created a handmade invitation: she’d written down a time and a place (7:30 at the lounge), and told him to come dressed up for “a special surprise.” It hadn't mentioned anything about a piano recital, because Fenix wanted to fully surprise him with her new skill. On the invitation she’d drawn a little picture of herself, looking fancy in a dress and grinning. It was adorable. 

Darcy and Fenix tiptoe down the hall towards his room. Fenix slips the invitation under the door, and then Darcy gives it three hard knocks before the two of them scurry back down the hall to hide behind Darcy’s bedroom door to watch. 

Sure enough, after a few seconds, Loki opens the door in confusion, picking up the invitation. Instantly, his eyes search down the hall, and Fenix throws herself back against the inside of Darcy’s door, giggling madly into the palm of her hand. 

Loki makes eye contact with Darcy, sending her a wordless message with his expression, almost as if to ask if she had anything to do with this. She just nods her head and winks at him. A blink-and-you’ll-miss-it grin tugs up at the corner of Loki’s mouth with understanding, and he slowly retracts back into his room, shutting the door behind him. 

“Did he see it? Did he see it?!” Fenix asks excitedly, practically bouncing up and down beside Darcy. 

“Oh, he saw it alright,” Darcy says, smiling down at Fenix, “Come on, let’s go set up before he gets down there.” 

Loki arrives at the lounge promptly at 7:30, knocking twice at the door. Fenix was waiting behind a window curtain to make her grand entrance, so she pushes Darcy to go and answer it. Darcy smoothes the skirt of her dress, clearing her throat as she twists the doorknob open.

“Good evening, sir,” She says in a mock, posh accent, “May I take your coat this evening?” 

Loki is standing there in an actual black suit and tie, fitted perfectly to his lean, lanky body. His hair is actually tamed-looking for once, and she can smell just the perfect amount of cologne on him - a subtle, crisp and clean scent. Darcy is surprised - she’d expected him to show up in a pair of nice clothes, but not this nice. He grins as he looks at her, and Darcy can tell by the look in his eyes he’s willing to play along, “No coat this evening, but thank you, miss.” 

He steps inside, pausing once he is close enough to Darcy to whisper in her ear, “What is going on?”

Darcy can feel herself tense up at the tickle of his breath on her skin, but she smiles as she pulls back to look at him and whisper, “You’ll find out.” She nods her head towards a very obviously shaped outline of Fenix hidden behind the curtains. 

“Ah,” Loki says, and Darcy leads him to the chair they’ve set up in the middle of the room - right in front of the piano. There’s a wary look on his face that Darcy can’t quite place, but at that moment, Fenix emerges from the curtains with extravagance. 

She takes her seat in front of the piano with all the elegance and poise of a grand master. The little girl definitely knows how to put on a show. Darcy comes and joins Fenix on the other side of the piano bench. Once she’s settled in, Fenix places her hands on the keys. 

“Remember,” Darcy whispers in her ear, “Start on A minor and D minor, here and here.” 

Fenix readjusts her placement per Darcy’s hint, and soon, she’s launching into the song they had practiced all week long: _Fly Me to the Moon_ by Frank Sinatra. After mastering _Mary Had a Little Lamb_ and _London Bridges_ before day two was even over, Darcy had picked this song for Fenix. Still an easy song for beginners, but Fenix had already proved she was a prodigy on the piano.

Darcy helps her with some of the trickier notes on the far side of the piano, and she can sense that Fenix is having fun with it. Even the little mistakes that she makes along the way don’t seem to bother her (whereas in the beginning, they would have caused her immense frustration), and she plays with grace through the song. 

The sound of the keys float up and fill the room, the snappy jazz song making both Darcy and Fenix smile as they play to completion. When Fenix hits the final note, she looks up at Darcy with pride before pushing herself off of the bench to face her father. 

Darcy looks over as Fenix prepares to take her bow in front of Loki. Darcy hadn’t looked at him since she sat down, and even she was eager to see his response. His expression is oddly unreadable at first, but then he stands, applauding with vigor as Fenix takes her bows. 

“Are you proud of me, Daddy?” Fenix asks, running over to him, “Darcy taught me how to play the piano. Now I sound just like you!” 

“I am so, so proud of you, Fen,” Loki says, his voiced laced with honesty, kneeling down to give his daughter a hug. He gives her an extra tight squeeze before letting go and standing back up, “It’s getting late though. What do you say you get dressed for bed and I’ll come tuck you in tonight, hm?”

Fenix squeals with delight, hugging his legs once more before practically skipping out of the room. Darcy folds her arms over her chest, her heart swelling with pride at what both she and Fenix had accomplished. Not only had Fenix performed beautifully, but Darcy had brought father and daughter together to share in the moment. She wonders smugly if ‘Nanny of the Year’ awards might be a real thing, because she’d definitely sweep every category. 

“I hope you liked the song choice,” Darcy says, just a hint of smugness escaping into her voice. She can't help herself. Loki still stands by his chair, facing the direction of the door Fenix had exited. Darcy continues talking as she walks towards him, “Fenix mastered the easy melodies early on, and - ”

“Get out,” He says suddenly, darkly, cutting her off as he turns to look at her with a menacing stare. 

“Wait…what?” Darcy asks, frozen in surprise. Loki’s eyes narrow as he gazes at her, his face full of unmistakable cold contempt. Is this some kind of joke? She opens her mouth, searching for an explanation, “What do you mean, get out?” 

“I _mean_ ,” Loki seethes, his voice steady yet threatening, “Vacate my house. Now.” 

“You’re kidding, right?” Darcy asks, studying his face but seeing no hint of amusement, “I just taught your daughter how to play the piano, and she performed, like, _flawlessly_ for you. Usually this might be where you shake my hand and say thank you or - ”

“Miss Lewis,” Loki cuts her off again, his eyes blazing, “If you do not wish to incur my wrath, which, believe me, has not even begun to surface…you will go upstairs, pack your belongings, and never, _ever_ , step foot in my house again.” 

Darcy can feel her blood begin to freeze, her whole system making it so that she’s too shocked to move. What had she done wrong? Again, she searches his face, but there is absolutely no indication of anything other than icy resolve and unrestrained fury. 

When she still doesn’t move or say anything, Loki turns away from her to leave, the disgust on his face matching his tone of voice as he says, “You have twenty minutes.” 

Darcy’s not sure how long it takes her to move from her spot in the lounge to her bedroom upstairs, but everything feels like a blur when she finally moves. She packs her belongings, just going through the motions. She doesn’t even bother to fold anything, just throwing it all into her suitcases. Her breathing is shallow, and everything feels unreal, almost like she’s a robot.

As she walks with her bags down the long hallways, the only coherent thought in her head is “What?” The question repeats over and over again in her head, with the occasional “Why?” thrown into the mix. She knows it’s only a matter of time before a deeper set of emotions flood through her, but right now, as her feet crunch on the gravel drive, taking her farther and farther away from the house, all she can feel is shell-shocked. 

She throws her bags in her car, shutting the trunk and going to sit in the front seat. She just sits there for a while - she’s not really sure how long - staring out at the gates at the end of the drive in front of her. Reaching into her purse beside her, Darcy pulls out her cellphone, scrolling through her contacts until she finds Jane, and she pushes the call button. 

The phone is pressed against her ear, the dial-tone shattering the silence around her. Finally, the line clicks, and Jane’s voice is flooding through the phone.

“Hello?”

Darcy sits there with the phone in her hand, not even really sure what to say. 

“Darcy? Hello? Are you there?”

“Jane…?”

“Yeah, hey. What’s up?”

Darcy takes a deep breath, feeling like it’s the only real breath she’s taken in the last half hour. She blinks rapidly - as though she’s finally aware of her surroundings - and she jams the key into the car’s ignition, twisting it until it roars to life. 

“Jane…I think I just got fired.”


	8. You Have Twenty Minutes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys, I have never, _ever_ seen such a wild response to one of my chapters like I have for Chapter 7 of this fic. The comments were through the roof, and my fic got almost a thousand new hits in less than two days. That is just. Wow. I am speechless. You guys are truly, truly the best. Thanks for all your love and support. I'm so glad you're enjoying this fic! I hope this next chapter is satisfying, and I should be back with the next chapter before Friday!

Darcy paces back in forth in her room while Jane sits against the wall on Darcy’s bed, watching her practically burn a hole into the carpeting. 

“…and that’s when he said, ‘You have twenty minutes.’” Darcy concludes her story in a rush, putting on a dramatically British sounding accent for the last part to mock Loki, “So I packed my stuff and got in the car, and that’s when I called you! I’m just…I’m just so - _aughhh!_ ” 

Darcy flops down onto her mattress in exasperation, and Jane pushes her legs up closer to her chest to make room for her. Darcy rolls over, looking up at the ceiling and running her hands through her hair, keeping her fingers stuck in her long, wavy tendrils. Jane had almost beat her to her house after she’d called, and she’d just spent the last half hour explaining in detail what had happened. Honestly, Darcy herself still can’t seem to wrap her mind around it. 

“I still don’t understand,” Jane says cautiously, peering down at Darcy, “Why were you fired?”

“That’s the thing!” Darcy says, pushing herself up on her elbows, “There was zero explanation, nada, nothing. Does that seem normal to you? Wigging out like that and firing someone because they taught your kid piano?” 

“No,” Jane responds, shaking her head, “But then again, Loki isn’t exactly the most normal person ever, either.”

“ _Pfft_ , you can say that again,” Darcy says sarcastically, blowing a piece of hair away from her mouth, “I’d at least like to know why he did it. That self-absorbed, arrogant prick. What’s he going to do without me, huh? How’s he going to take care of Fenix on his own?” Darcy is starting to get worked up again, the words flying out of her mouth faster and faster, “He doesn’t know the first thing about his own kid. That whole house is going to crash and burn without me there full-time; I’d give it at least twenty-four hours come Monday. God, that just pisses me off.”

Darcy pushes herself off the bed, striding over towards her dresser, “Doesn’t that just piss you off?” She rummages around her drawers, the sound of trinkets and knickknacks thumping around inside, “Do you wanna get high? I really wanna get high. I know I have some weed leftover here from Christmas break, if it’s still any good.” 

Jane walks over and puts a hand on Darcy’s shoulder in a gentle manner, “Darcy. Stop. Take a deep breath.”

Darcy stops what she’s doing and lets her head hang, listening to Jane’s sage advice. She sucks in a long, deep breath, tilting her head back and closing her eyes as she blows out. When she opens her eyes again, they land on an unmistakable small jar of weed, pushed back into the corner of her drawer.

“Hey!” Darcy says excitedly, reaching for it and holding it up, “Your breathing trick worked. I knew it was still in here somewhere.”

Jane gives Darcy a look, “You know what I meant. Are you gunna be alright?”

Darcy tries to give Jane a smile, but it falters slightly. If she’s being honest with herself - she really doesn’t know at this point. She’d just lost a great job, and for seemingly no reason. It really doesn’t get much worse than that. Maybe in time she’d be alright, but right now she just wants to try and forget about it. 

Darcy shrugs at Jane, raising her eyebrows slightly, “If you smoke this weed with me, I might be.”

Jane smiles a little at Darcy’s proposition, “I’m not gunna get high with you, Darcy. But I'll be here for you as I watch from the sidelines.” 

“Oh, come on, Jane, that’s no fun.” Darcy actually lets out a small laugh before sighing, “Some things never change.” 

Jane punches Darcy’s shoulder lightly, “Hey! I don’t appreciate the peer pressure, Darcy.”

“It’s just weed!” Darcy laughs, shaking the jar in front of their faces.

“I think NASA has a pretty strict drug-free policy,” Jane argues, folding her arms, “Speaking of, I actually had plans to go out with a few of my coworkers tonight. I haven't seen them in a while, since I'm working from home this summer. You should tag along, if you’re game.”

Darcy opens her mouth in mock surprise, “Wait…you guys actually have lives…outside the laboratory?”

“Ha, ha,” Jane deadpans, before adopting a more eager expression, “Come with us. It’ll be fun. We’re going to go to a couple bars downtown, listen to some music. It’ll be good for you to…you, know, get your mind off of…”

“Yeah,” Darcy says, appreciating Jane’s offer. She smiles up at her best friend, “Why not?” 

A couple hours and a few drinks later, Darcy is actually feeling pretty good. That is to say, she at least hasn’t thought about Loki and getting fired since she’d come out. Jane and her nerdy buddies all had a lot to talk about concerning their research, but Darcy didn’t mind sitting back and enjoying the atmosphere. The music had actually been pretty good at the first few bars they went to, and they were finally at their last bar of the night, a stage tech setting up for the last band of the evening. 

Darcy stirs her rum and coke with her straw, sipping occasionally as Jane and her friends wrap up another conversation about astrophysics. One of her colleagues turns to Darcy, nodding their head towards the stage, “I love coming here. They always manage to book the best music. A lot of unknown talent, but sometimes really popular bands come here to play secret shows. Last month, The Arctic Monkeys came and played an unannounced show, but I missed it.” 

“Really? That’s pretty sweet,” Darcy says almost in unison with Jane’s subtle gasp on her other side.

“No. Fucking. Way.” Jane says, and when Jane swears, Darcy knows it’s important. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

Darcy turns to look at Jane for an explanation, but her gaze is completely fixated on the stage. At first glance, nothing really seems out of place. A few of the musicians have hopped up to take their places: a man with orange hair and a matching beard is strapping a guitar around his shoulders, an Asian man plays a few warm up notes on a keyboard, a skinny-looking blonde guy with a goatee takes his place in front of the microphone. But then Darcy’s eyes land on the drum set in the back and the man approaching it.

The tallest of the group sits down with a pair of drum sticks in his hands, pushing his dirty blonde hair out of his ruggedly handsome face as he scoots closer. His impossibly big arm muscles seem to bulge out of his tight, maroon t-shirt, and when he looks out into the audience, his icy blue eyes are unmistakable. 

“Good evening, everyone,” The blonde man with the goatee addresses the crowd, his accented voice mixing with his breathing into the microphone, “I’m Fandral. That’s Hogun and Volstagg to my left and right. And behind me on drums is Thor Odinson. We are _Warrior’s Four_.” 

An enormously wild cheer erupts throughout the crowd as the first few guitar notes rip through the speakers. But Darcy just sits there with her mouth agape. 

_Well_. This is the night that just won’t quit.

__________________________________

“I’m going to go talk to him,” Darcy yells over to Jane as soon as the band finishes their set. There must be over hundreds of people packed into the tiny bar, everyone pressed up against each other to catch a glimpse of the famous Thor Odinson. Apparently, word had travelled fast that he was in downtown Santa Monica playing a secret show.

“What?!” Jane asks, and Darcy’s not sure if it’s because she’s surprised or she can’t hear her. Either way, Darcy edges her way closer to the front of the stage, leaving Jane behind with her gaping expression. 

She’s not exactly sure what her game plan is as she barges into people, roughly pushing her way forward. All she knows is that Thor _fucking_ Odinson is standing in front of her, and how many more opportunities is she going to have to at least try to talk to him about Loki? If she’s lucky, she might get some explanations about his behavior. 

Roughly a bazillion people are all clamoring to take pictures as the band packs up their instruments, security guards now pushing people back into place. What had started out as a humble, secret show had now turned into a madhouse. Darcy creeps up closer to the stage, wiggling her way under one woman’s arm and even under and through a pair of legs. Finally, she’s standing only three feet away from him.

“Thor!” She calls out, but it’s useless - pretty much everyone in the building is calling out variations of the same thing. Quickly, she racks her brain, trying to come up with a better way to get his attention. 

“Hey, I work - used to work for Loki…Loki Laufeyson!” She calls out, and instantly his head snaps up from where he’s packing up, his blue eyes searching for hers. 

“Do you have time to talk?” Darcy yells out, hoping there’s a way for the two of them to meet somewhere more private. 

Thor scoffs a little as he looks at her, casting his eyes back down as he reaches to pick up his bag. “Sorry…I don't have time to be meeting with everyone who claims they know my brother. Nor do I think I’d really want to.” 

The crowd seems to only be getting louder and louder, and security guards are pushing people away with even more fervor. One of them motions for Thor to get off the stage and go backstage, and Darcy can see her opportunity slowly slipping from in front of her. He doesn’t believe her - he just thinks she’s another groupie. 

“Wait!” Darcy cries as two security guards guide Thor backstage, “I swear I know your brother. I know about Fenix!” 

Thor’s head whips around at that, his eyes wide in confusion and surprise, but he doesn’t turn around. The crowded bar population is pushing their way between Darcy and him at that point, and the security guards are adamant about escorting him backstage. 

Darcy sighs, kicking an empty plastic cup on the ground, the residue liquid splattering across the floor and onto a few people’s jeans. She’d just wanted a chance to talk to him, ask him anything at all about Loki, their family, why things were the way they were. She thought maybe if she could explain her connection to Loki, he’d be more receptive, but this was obviously neither the time nor the place for a conversation like that. 

She was definitely not having luck with either Odinson brother tonight. Which is a thought she never believed she’d ever have the opportunity to experience until now. But it still didn’t make it suck any less.

__________________________________

It was Tuesday afternoon - officially five days since Darcy had been fired - when her mother knocks on her bedroom door.

“Honey, are you feeling okay?” She asks, poking her head through the door. 

“Just dandy,” Darcy replies dryly, sitting criss-cross on her bed, scrolling through CareerLink and Linkedin searches on her laptop. She thought maybe she could live in denial a little longer, but her bills weren’t going to pay themselves. Plus, if she actually had a few career options lined up, it might help get her mom off her back. She hadn’t exactly explained the whole “getting fired” thing to her yet, and she had a feeling this is why she was paying her a visit now.

“Why aren’t you at work today?” Her mother asks. Yep. Right on schedule. “I thought you might have called in sick yesterday, but two days in a row? Are you coming down with something?” 

“Not exactly,” Darcy says slowly, the guilt creeping into her voice. Her mom gives her a look, pushing her to explain. “I maybe might have sort of kind of definitely gotten fired. BUT! Before you jump on my back, I’m already looking at new jobs.”

Her mother sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose, “Oh, Darcy.” 

After a short conversation in which Darcy explains nothing had actually been her fault, her mother leaves a bit more understanding. She’d also suggested giving Tony a call to see about working at Stark Industries. Darcy promises that she will, but on the inside she knows she’s not quite that desperate yet. 

As soon as her mother leaves, Darcy blows out a sigh of relief, grateful that she’d gotten that conversation out of the way. She looks back down at her search queries, already sick of scrolling through the stuffy office-type work openings. Picking up her phone, she shoots Jane a text.

Darcy, 11:45 am: _Lunch today? Save me from the monotony that is job hunting._

Jane, 11:47 am: _Give me an hour. In the middle of working through something._

When the doorbell rings twenty minutes later, Darcy is impressed at Jane’s speed. Usually, in Jane-speak, an hour means ninety minutes, not forty minutes earlier. Quickly, she throws her hair up into a messy bun, pulls on a stylish pair of booties, grabs her purse, and takes the steps down two at a time.

“Going out for lunch with Jane!” Darcy calls out to whoever in the house might care. She opens the door and stops dead in her tracks. Because that’s definitely not Jane Foster standing there with a bouquet of lilac roses. 

It’s Loki Laufeyson. 

“Miss Lewis, allow me to - ”

Darcy shuts the door in his face, cutting him off. There's no way this is happening right now. She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. Hand still on the doorknob, she counts to five before opening both her eyes and the door again. 

“Yep. You’re still here,” She deadpans. 

Loki sets his jaw into a hard line, “I probably deserved that, didn’t I?”

“What, the door-slam in your face?” She asks, pulling an incredulous face. “You deserve a lot more than that, buddy.” 

Loki opens his mouth, the fire in his eyes looking like he’s all set for a knock-down, drag-out argument. But then he falters, taking a deep breath and calming himself down. He meets her gaze with more submissiveness as he quietly replies, “You’re right.” 

Well, that was unexpected. Had she heard him right? She wasn’t prepared for this encounter in the first place, but once it happened, she was equally unprepared for this quick change of attitude. She looks him up and down, standing there on her humble front porch. Behind him in the driveway is his sleek black Jaguar Coupe parked next to her rundown Corolla. The contrast is ridiculous, and it almost makes her want to laugh out loud. 

“What are you doing here, Loki?” She finally asks, her voice a little softer, but not by much. 

“I owe you an explanation for my actions…” Loki says, pausing a bit, as though this next admission is tougher for him, “…and an apology. I’d also like to offer you your job back, if you’ll take it. Please, allow me just a few minutes of your time.”

Darcy raises an eyebrow. That must be what the flowers in his hand were for. She chews on her lower lip, thinking about her options. All weekend, she wanted nothing more than to tear his stupid head right off. But now, as he stands here in front of her - his striking green eyes, his apologetic look and tone - her feelings have shifted. It’s almost as if he’s got her spellbound. Damn him. 

Darcy sighs in resignation, “Fine. But I’m only doing this for Fenix.” 

Loki’s face relaxes into gratitude, “Of course. And these flowers are for you.”

Darcy takes the lilac roses as he hands them off to her, bringing them up to her nose and breathing in deeply. They were magnificent - definitely not the cheap stuff sold at the local grocery store. Quickly, she opens her eyes, not wanting to seem like she was being bought so easily, “Thanks. But my favorite color rose is orange.” 

Loki does a half-eye roll, “Naturally.” 

“Come inside,” She finally offers, jerking her head in the direction of her living room. As he passes by her, she can’t resist throwing out one last jab, lowering her voice in light mockery, “ _You have twenty minutes_.” 

She doesn’t have to see his face to know the pissed expression he’s making at the echo of his own words. Darcy is smirking as she shuts the door behind him.


	9. Take These Broken Wings and Learn to Fly

Loki sits down on her living room couch, and it’s probably one of the most surreal sights Darcy’s ever seen. Loki Laufeyson was in her living room. In her house. It definitely was a surreal sight for her mother, who pauses on her way from the kitchen to the garage, keys in hand. 

“Darcy?” She asks warily, looking from between where Loki sat on the couch and where Darcy sat across from him in a chair, flowers in her hand. 

“Don’t worry about it, mom,” Darcy says, waving her away. Her mom raises her eyebrows and walks down the hallway. After Darcy hears the garage doors open, she turns her attention back towards Loki.

“So. You lasted longer than I thought,” She comments with some sass. 

Loki looks at her with a quizzical expression, “Excuse me?”

“Oh, nothing,” Darcy says nonchalantly, “I just had a bet going with my friend Jane. I thought for sure you wouldn’t make it past Monday without me. But here we are, Tuesday afternoon…”

“You’re quite smug, has anyone ever told you that?” Loki replies with a hint of disdain. 

“And yet, you’re still sitting in my house,” Darcy says, unable to help herself, “Begging me to take my job back.”

“I do _not_ beg,” Loki responds harshly, and Darcy can see she’s working him up. She can’t help but smile to herself a little - it felt good to have the upper hand, to have the ball in her court. Besides, after the way he treated her last, she doesn’t really feel guilty about it. But for conversation’s sake, she decides to steer him away from anger right now.

“Right,” She comments with mild sarcasm. She gestures with one hand towards him, “So, I’m all ears. Whenever you’re ready.”

Loki rolls his eyes before he takes a breath, calming himself down. When he speaks, his voice is softer, quieter than before, “I suppose I should start all this out by saying that I’m sorry for the way I treated you last Thursday night. My anger was misdirected.” Darcy gives him a confused look, prompting him to continue. He slides his tongue across his lower lip in focus, his eyes downcast, and Darcy knows that whatever is coming next is difficult for him to admit. 

“I was not angry at you for teaching Fenix piano,” He explains, before shrugging his shoulder slightly, “Although, at the time, I thought I was. You see, in time I came to realize that I…I was angry at myself for not having taught her first.” 

His tone is laced with regret, and Darcy can hear the hurt in his voice. He looks up at her with expressive, passionate eyes as he continues, “I was supposed to be the one to teach her piano…to introduce her to music. When I saw that you had done that instead of me, I was furious. But I realized…” Loki pauses, taking a deep breath, “It wasn’t your fault. It was my own. How detached have I become from my own daughter that she is off growing and studying and learning things to which I am oblivious? I should have made time for her.”

Despite herself, Darcy is actually feeling a pang of sorrow for the man sitting in front of her. Here he was, sitting in her living room, humbly admitting to his faults. And Darcy knows that for Loki, this cannot be easy. 

Loki sits up a little straighter, continuing with his explanation, “So, I thought, ‘We don’t need a nanny. From now on, it will just be Fenix and I, and I’ll never miss another opportunity to teach her something new. It’ll be a fresh start for the two of us.’” Loki pauses, a look of guilt on his face, “But do you know what I realized then, Miss Lewis?” 

Darcy slowly shakes her head no.

“I realized that I don’t know my daughter as well as I thought I did,” Loki says simply, but in that single admission, Darcy can sense his heartache. “I barely even know her at all.”

A silence hangs between them after Loki’s confession, and Darcy looks at him with sympathy. She can’t help herself - this dysfunctional family has somehow managed to weasel its way into her heart, and dammit, she's attached to them. 

“I’m sorry again, Miss Lewis,” Loki concludes, “You were only doing your job, and I let my emotions get in the way of that. It’s obvious that Fenix adores you…” He pauses, making sure to hold her gaze, “And you are quite easily the best nanny she’s ever had. If it’s not too late, your position is still open, should you choose to come back.”

Darcy chews on her lower lip, studying his face. Of course she’s going to come back. But she needs to make sure she sets a few ground rules straight. She can’t have Loki living in regret anymore, and then taking it out on her. 

“Well, I’m still pissed at you for the way you treated me,” Darcy says finally, hardening her look, “But I’ll come back and work for you on one condition.”

“Anything,” Loki says, looking at her with wide, open eyes. 

“You’re going to spend at least two days a week with Fenix and I,” Darcy says, giving him her ultimatum. “You obviously don’t spend enough time with her on the weekends when I’m not there, so this has to be it. If you want to be there for your daughter…if you want to bond with her, you have to do that. I don’t care what you’ve got going on in your crazy rockstar world, you have to spend time with her. Otherwise she’s going to grow up, and you’ll be nothing more than a stranger to her.”

Loki nods his head, swallowing the hard truth that Darcy was speaking, “I can do that.” 

“Good,” Darcy says, smiling a little. Loki offers a smile back - a little more forced than hers - but a smile nonetheless. “And, Loki? For the record?”

“Yes, Miss Lewis?”

“Fenix adores you, too,” Darcy says, and she can see his expression soften.

__________________________________

The next morning, Fenix is overjoyed to see Darcy back in the house. Apparently, Loki had only told her she was taking some time off, not that he had fired her. Darcy suspects that, deep down, he always knew he’d want her back. The thought makes her smile for some reason.

She’s just finished making Fenix breakfast when Loki enters the kitchen, kissing the top of Fenix’s head. He’s dressed moderately casual - his usual dark green v-neck and black pants. There’s a pair of aviator shades hanging from his shirt as he leans over to give Fenix a hug from behind.

“Daddy!” She squeals, not used to seeing him like this - early in the morning and on a weekday. She wheels around in her stool from where she sits at the counter to give him a hug. “Are you gunna eat breakfast with us?” 

“I am. And do you know what else, Fen?” He says, making brief eye contact with Darcy, “I’ve cleared my whole schedule. I’m yours for the day.” 

Fenix practically bounces out of her seat she’s so excited, and Darcy has to bite down on her bottom lip to cover her own smile. The look on Fenix’s face alone is enough to convince her that this is the right thing to do - for both father and daughter’s sake. 

Loki comes and sits beside Fenix, grabbing an apple out of the fruit bowl on the counter and taking a bite, “So, the day is yours, my darling. What would you like to do?”

Fenix makes a thinking sound, pursing her lips together, “Let’s go swimming. At the beach!” 

“The beach?” Loki asks, a hesitant look on his face as he sets the apple down, “We’ve got a perfectly good swimming pool in the backyard.”

Darcy shoots him a look, as if to say ‘just go with it,’ which he definitely notices. If he was going to play the dad game, he was going to play it right, and Darcy was going to make sure of it. 

“But the beach has sand!” Fenix counters, “And seashells and starfish and dolphins.”

Loki looks back over to Fenix with more understanding, “Of course, silly me. Why don’t you go put on your swimsuit, and then we’ll go?” 

Fenix shoots out of her chair faster than a rocket, leaving both Darcy and Loki behind in the kitchen. Darcy washes her hands with a dishtowel, a smug look on her face as she stands over the kitchen sink, “That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

“I haven’t been to the beach in years,” He says, sounding a little overwhelmed. “What do you even do at the beach?” 

“Don’t worry,” Darcy puts down the towel, smiling as she walks past him, “Fortunately for you, I am a master of all things fun.” 

Darcy packs a picnic lunch, as well as some sunblock, towels, an umbrella and beach toys for Fenix, and after Fenix is dressed and ready to go, the three of them head out. Loki makes a beeline straight for his Jaguar in the garage, but Darcy throws out a hand to stop him. 

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, what are you doing?” She asks, raising an eyebrow. 

“Driving us to the beach?” Loki responds sarcastically. 

“No way, we’re taking my car,” Darcy says, taking Fenix by the hand and steering them in the direction of her Corolla, “There’s like, zero chance your fancy schmancy car is coming back from the beach without a few scratches. And I am not about to deal with your inevitable heart attack over it. I’m driving us in my car.” 

Loki huffs out an irritated breath, but he doesn’t argue with her as he places his aviators on and follows her, sliding into the front seat of her car. Fenix sits comfortably in the back seat, her coloring book and a few dolls to keep her company on the short road trip down to the coast. 

On their way out of the neighborhood, Darcy digs around in her purse at a stoplight, pushing a few items around until she finds what’s she’s looking for. As the light turns green, she tosses her iPod over to Loki, where he catches it with quick reflexes. 

“You’re the DJ,” Darcy says, nodding her head towards the auxiliary cord connected beneath her stereo. 

“I’m honored,” Loki deadpans, and Darcy laughs a little. She can hear him clicking it on, slowly clicking and scrolling through her playlists. 

“You have _Nicki Minaj?_ ” Loki questions after a minute, a sound of disapproval in his voice, “ _Taylor Swift?_ Oh, for the love of God…please tell me there is an acceptable reason you have Justin Bieber on your iPod.” 

Darcy shoots him a playful look before focusing back on the road, “Okay, I only have _one_ Justin Bieber song on there. And it’s from when I was in, like, tenth grade. As for Nicki and Taylor, no shame.” 

She doesn’t have to look at him to know he’s giving her a questionable stare, and it makes the corners of her mouth tug up ever so slightly in a smile. A few more minutes pass as he continues to scroll through what seems like her entire library.

“Ya know, if I wanted to listen to ‘Deafening Silence feat. Sporadic Complaints On My Taste In Music,’ I would’ve kept the iPod in the purse,” Darcy jokes lightly, and a glance in the rear view mirror shows that Fenix is too fully absorbed in her coloring book to pay any attention to their conversation. 

“Apologies,” Loki says dryly, pausing before looking over at her, “I can’t help but notice your varied taste. The Beatles. Fleetwood Mac. The Rolling Stones. The Clash. Quite a contrast from Taylor Swift.”

Darcy smirks, “I like the best of both worlds, what can I say? If you click through The Beatles, you can see I own just about every song of theirs. My parents were really into them, and they were one of the first bands I was ever obsessed with.” 

“Favorite song?” He asks quickly, inquisitively. 

“ _Blackbird_ , from the _White Album_ ,” Darcy answers without hesitation. “I don’t think it’s one of their most popular songs - ”

“ - It’s not - ”

“ - but it’s so simple, just the guitar and Paul. And the lyrics get to me every time. That whole album is one of my favorites, actually. That was the time when Ringo walked out on a recording session, and they needed someone to play the drums, so- ”

“ - Sir Paul McCartney played in his stead. Yes, I know.” Loki finishes her sentence. It’s neither condescending nor impatient, but rather a quiet astonishment. He raises his eyebrows, looking back down at the iPod, “I’m impressed.”

It’s all he says, but it’s enough to cause an inexplicable swell of pride in Darcy’s chest. She was finally speaking his language, and he knows it. She’s grinning as she focuses on the road, and Loki settles on her Beatles playlist as the first notes of _Blackbird_ fill the car. 

When they finally arrive at the beach, Darcy is pleased to find it much less crowded than she’d expected. It was only mid-morning on a Wednesday, though. Darcy catches Fenix before she can race out of the car and head down to the beach. 

“Hey you!” She says, and Fenix turns around in the parking lot. She holds up a bottle of sunscreen and wiggles it around, “Get back here.”

Fenix groans as Darcy applies a liberal amount of sunscreen to her front, and out of the corner of Darcy’s eye, she can see Loki grinning. Fenix turns around while Darcy lathers the sunblock on her back, and she looks up at her father who is leaning against Darcy’s car. 

“Daddy, will you go into the ocean with me?” She asks her voice sounding small, “I’m afraid of the sharks.” 

“Statistically, the chances of a shark attack are…” Loki begins, but off of Darcy’s ridiculous look, he changes directions, “I mean…of course I will, sweetheart.” 

Fenix smiles and claps her hands, and as soon as Darcy releases her, she’s tugging at her father’s hand, “Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go!” 

“Wait a minute!” Darcy cries out, her hands still covered in residue sunblock. She walks over to Loki and promptly wipes the sunblock off - all over his arms. Fenix tries to stifle her giggling, and even though Loki’s eyes are covered by his shades, it’s still obvious he’s shooting her the most unamused look possible.

“There.” Darcy says proudly, stepping back from her sunblock creation on his arms. “Now everyone’s protected from the sun.” 

As Fenix drags Loki down the sidewalk, the pair looks akin to an overly-excited dog on a leash, pulling its owner forward. Loki looks back at Darcy as if to say ‘save me,’ and it causes Darcy to burst out laughing, waving goodbye as she watches them go. 

While Loki and Fenix splash around in the ocean (it was more or less Fenix splashing around and Loki making sure she didn’t wander too far out, which she seemed prone to), Darcy sets up a few beach towels under an umbrella in the sand. She peels off her shirt and shorts, wearing her favorite purple bikini as she lies down on a beach towel. She was ready to take advantage of the father/daughter bonding time with an afternoon catnap. After lazily dozing in and out of sleep, it’s not long before Fenix is back at her side, poking her shoulder.

“Darcy! Darcy!” The little girl says, “Come see the sand castle daddy and I built!” 

Darcy throws on her shades as she sits up, following Fenix as she skips down the beach towards the shoreline. There, sitting by a giant castle made out of sand (surrounded by a tiny moat) is Loki, his bottom lip bit down in concentration as he carves something into one of the towers with his finger. 

“Wow, Fenix, this is amazing,” Darcy says, and she means it. She watches as Fenix goes to Loki’s side, and as soon as he notices her presence, whispers something into her ear. She grins and replaces his finger with her own on their side of the tower. 

It really is a sight that warms Darcy’s heart - watching the two of them sit there and build this castle together. She watches as Fenix squints her eyes in concentration, and Loki’s hand sneaks around to tickle her side. She howls with laughter, slapping his hand away, and even Loki is grinning at her playfulness. Finally, Fenix looks over to Darcy, “Okay, come over here, look at this!” 

Darcy walks over and takes a peak at the tower, squinting in the sunlight. Finally, she can make out little stick figure sketches in the window of the tower - a woman and a little girl.

“See, that’s you and me!” Fenix says excitedly, pointing to the sand illustrations. 

“How cool!” Darcy says, smiling, “But where’s your dad?”

“Ah,” Loki says, gesturing towards a sketchy stick figure drawing of a man in the sand underneath the tower. The drawing has what appears to be a guitar in his hands. “There I am. Per request of Fenix. Serenading you both with my music.” Darcy holds a hand up to her mouth as she laughs. It really was incredibly cute. 

Fenix leans over, pulling on Loki’s arm, “Daddy, can I go back out into the water by myself?”

“By yourself?” Darcy interjects with surprise, “But I thought you were afraid of the sharks?”

“Yeah, I was,” Fenix says with a shrug, “But daddy told me all the sharks are on vacation now, and they won’t bother me.”

Darcy makes a sound of enlightenment as Loki looks at Fenix, “Go ahead, darling. Don’t go out too far.” 

Fenix kisses his cheek before running out into the water. Darcy comes over to Loki’s side and sits down where Fenix had been, plopping down into the sand. She doesn’t want to call attention to it - to ruin the moment - but it’s obvious that in the course of one afternoon, both Fenix and Loki are closer than ever before. It’s amazing how one afternoon together at the beach can improve any relationship. 

They both watch quietly for a few minutes as Fenix splashes out in the shallow waves. Loki ends up breaking the silence first, looking over at Darcy. His knees are pulled up, both arms resting on top of them. That’s when Darcy notices the way his muscles pull taught under his skin, and she can’t deny it’s a pleasant view. His broad back and narrow waist were also on display, but she tries not to be too obvious as he speaks to her. 

“When we were in the car earlier, I noticed you had every _Odinsons_ album on your iPod,” He comments. Darcy’s not sure how to respond, unsure of whether or not it might set him off, but thankfully he keeps talking, “I take it you were a big fan?”

“You could say that,” Darcy replies, trying to play it down. Would it be a weird thing to admit that she had posters of both him and his brother in her room when she was in high school? Probably. “I think you guys made some of the best music of the early 2000s. Hands down. I’m not just saying that because you’re my boss now, either.”

Loki laughs a little, shaking his head, “Well, thank you.” 

“Fenix mentioned to me a little while ago that you might want to play music again someday?” Darcy asks cautiously. The last time - the only other time - she’d asked him about his music, he’d snapped at her for prying into his personal life. But it seems like it was a long time ago now. And things feel different between them. “She said that it’s the reason why you’ve been holed up in your recording studio. Is that true? Because, I mean, even if it’s not with your brother, that would still be really, really cool.” 

“I’ve been working on some solo music, yes,” Loki admits, nodding his head, “I didn’t play for a very long time. It’s been a while since I’ve recorded anything at all. Ever since - ” Loki pauses abruptly, almost like he’s decided to choose his next words carefully “- ever since Thor and I decided to break up.” 

Darcy studies his face, but decides not to push the issue. It was evident he was close to admitting something different, but Darcy doesn’t want to ruin the moment they’re having, whatever that might be, so she responds with a simple “Ah.”

Darcy looks back out into the ocean, watching as Fenix continues to splash around. It’s not until she turns to look back at Loki does she realize he’s already staring at her. Intently. She can feel herself beginning to blush a little under his unyielding gaze, so she decides to make a joke out of it, “What? Do I have something on my face?”

Loki chuckles a little, breaking eye contact as he scoops up a little sand in his fingers and lets it sift through. He does it a few times before looking back up at her, “Thank you, Miss Lewis.”

“For what?”

“For everything you’ve done,” Loki replies simply, and somehow, Darcy still understands. 

At that moment, an older couple walks by them, hand in hand. The woman pauses, taking a few steps closer to Darcy and Loki, “Is that your little girl in the water?”

“Yes,” Loki responds, and Darcy can detect fatherly pride in his voice.

“She’s just adorable,” The old woman replies with fondness, and she looks between both Loki and Darcy, “You make a beautiful family.” 

Darcy can feel her cheeks heat up in embarrassment, and she opens her mouth to stammer out some kind of correction. Loki on the other hand, always quick with his words, responds first with an easy, “Thank you.” 

Satisfied, the older couple walks away. And as they do, Loki looks over to Darcy with a shrug and a wink, “I’ve found that it’s easier to lie sometimes, don’t you think?”


	10. Burning Down the House

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo, I just wanted to take the time to say thanks again for all the love on this story. I'm starting to get busier with school, but I promise to keep updating here with regularity! Thanks for all your wonderful patience. You guys are forever da best.

Darcy usually wakes up earlier than Fenix and eats breakfast for herself. The house is quiet and empty, and she uses the time to do a few sudoku puzzles before waking up the girl. That’s why the morning after the beach trip, she’s shocked to see Loki is already in the kitchen, standing in front of a burning stove. 

“Oh my god!” Darcy shrieks, her eyes wide as she stands in shock. There is a pillar of smoke rising from a skillet, and Loki stands in front of it, haphazardly swatting at it with a dishtowel. It’s about five seconds away from catching on fire itself. 

Darcy quickly recovers from the alarming sight and rushes over to help him. They’re both hacking and coughing as she pushes him out of the way, lifting the frying pan from the stovetop and whirling it around towards the sink. She throws it in, letting the crispy black remnants of what looks like a pancake cool down away from the heat source.

“What the hell was that?” Darcy asks breathlessly, looking at Loki like he’s gone insane. He stands there in front of her, his expression like a child who's been caught stealing from the cookie jar. 

“I was attempting to make breakfast for Fenix,” He replies defensively, crossing his arms. Darcy notices the pancake batter splattered across his forearms. There’s even a little streak across his forehead. 

“Not to pull a Gordon Ramsay here,” Darcy says, switching on the sink faucet and letting the cool water wash over the pan, “But that pancake was so overcooked it looked like a lump of coal. At any point did you not stop and think ‘Hmm, better stop before it burns down the house’?”

Loki levels a stare at her, “I’m not the best cook in the world, I’ll admit it. Things just…got out of hand. Rather quickly.”

“ _Pfft_ , I’ll say,” Darcy says, and as she looks between the still sizzling pancake in the sink and Loki - standing there covered in pancake batter - a small giggle escapes her mouth. And then another. Before she knows it, she’s got one hand pressed against her mouth to stop herself from dissolving into hysterics.

“Is something amusing to you?” Loki asks, his brows knotted together in confusion. 

“You just…oh god, I’m sorry, you’ve just got pancake batter on your arms,” Darcy responds between laughs. She gestures with one hand up towards his face, “And right there, right where your eyebrows crinkle together. You look ridiculous.” 

She’s laughing too hard to notice the corner of his mouth tug up in a small grin, or that he’s dipped two fingers in the pancake batter. “Ridiculous, am I? Let’s see how you like it.”

Taking a step forward, Loki smears the pancake batter across her cheek, swiping almost from her ear to the bottom of her chin. She gasps in shock, her giggling momentarily on pause, “Oh no you didn’t.” She reaches for the pancake batter bowl as he takes a step away in innocent surrender, hands held out on front of him. “It’s on, now.” 

Darcy swipes up a glob of batter, lunging towards him. Loki’s grinning as he tries to pin her arms down to her sides. Darcy squeals as she tries to wiggle out of his grasp, writhing against him, trying to hit him with more pancake batter. But that’s when Natasha walks into the room. 

Both Darcy and Loki freeze, and instantly Darcy pushes herself away from him. She hadn’t realized how intimate the situation had been until Natasha made herself present. But now, as she awkwardly coughs and averts her gaze from both Loki and Natasha, she realizes just how close they were - practically pressed up against each other. And just how flirtatious the whole thing had been. How did _that_ happen? 

Natasha eyes them curiously before taking a breath and slamming down a magazine on the countertop. Both Darcy and Loki peer over to see what it was. There - on the cover - was a picture of the two of them at the beach yesterday, sitting in front of the sandcastle. The caption read: _Loki Odinson’s New Lady Love?_

Natasha sighs, “You do realize if you don’t tell me where you’re going, I can’t stop this kind of press from getting out.” She’s addressing Loki with narrowed eyes, “I need to work with some kind of prevention plan here, Laufeyson.” 

“ _Laufeyson_ ,” Loki imitates Natasha, looking at Darcy with amusement, “Now I know she’s angry with me.” 

“Is this a joke to you?” Natasha asks, her voice sounding shorter than usual, “This is one of the first major photos the paparazzi have managed to snap of you in years. I’m sure they’re all having a field day over this.”

Darcy bites down on her lower lip, looking from the tabloid to Natasha, “But we’re not - I’m mean, I’m not - ”

“His girlfriend?” Natasha finishes for her, “Yeah, doesn’t matter. They only see what they want to see. And now, everyone else is going to see it that way, too. Thankfully it’s only a side shot, so it’s harder to tell who you are.”

Loki groans next to Darcy, running one hand down his face, “Sigyn.” 

“What?” Darcy asks with confusion. 

“She’ll be pissed at me once she sees this. Now _that_ is when the real damage control is going to come in handy,” Loki murmurs and rolls his eyes.

Natasha just shrugs, “Hey, that’s your problem, not mine. Just promise me no more beach trips without letting me know first, otherwise there will be a lot more where this came from.”

Both Natasha and Loki storm out of the room in different directions, leaving Darcy standing there in the middle of the kitchen, confused and covered in pancake batter.

__________________________________

When Fenix gets out of her art class that afternoon, she’s bouncing with more excitement than usual. She runs up to Darcy, tugging on her hand, “Darcy! Can I go over to my friend’s house and play? Please, please, pleeease?!”

The extended whine on the last 'please' makes Darcy laugh a little, “What friend? It has to be okay with his or her parents, first.”

“Ah, I think it’ll be okay,” Says a voice from behind Darcy, and she whirls around to see Steve Rogers smiling at her. Next to him is his own little girl, and both she and Fenix high five each other. 

“If you say so, Captain,” Darcy replies with a smile to match. 

It’s only after she’s actually dropping Fenix off in front of Steve’s house that she realizes that this playdate extends to more than just the kids. Darcy’s explaining to Fenix how she’ll be back in an hour to pick her up when Steve walks over to her passenger side window and leans in, “I thought you might like to come inside and stay for a while. I can make us some coffee. No use in driving all the way home and back again.” 

Darcy shrugs nonchalantly, but on the inside she’s feeling all kinds of flattered. It was obvious that Steve was eager to get that date with her, and Darcy doesn’t find herself complaining one bit. She gets out of the car to follow Steve and his daughter, Margaret, into the house. 

Fenix notices, and she turns around to whisper to Darcy, “Wait, you’re staying?”

“Yep,” Darcy says with a goofy smile still on her face, “Margaret’s dad invited me in for a coffee date.” Fenix gives her a suspicious look before running ahead to join Margaret. As they approach the house, Steve holds open the door for Darcy, and she thanks him as they go inside. 

“So, soldier boy,” Darcy says after they’re both sitting on his couch together. They’d been making pleasant get-to-know-you-chatter for the last ten or fifteen minutes. Both Fenix and Margaret are upstairs playing, and she can hear the patter of their footsteps as they run around. “Is this a date?”

Steve shrugs, a sly smile on his face, “It can if you want it to be.”

“I’ll let you know,” Darcy says, taking a sip of her coffee, “So far, you make a pretty mean roast, so kudos for that.” 

Steve laughs, a small blush on his cheeks. He was pretty damn cute, there was no denying that. He sets his mug down and looks at her, “Thanks. My wife used to make the coffee, believe it or not, so that was a pretty rocky transition…all things considered.”

The comment was probably meant to be a joke, but there was a hint of sadness in his voice that Darcy detects. She tucks her knees up under her, one arm resting on the back of the couch as she looks at him, “How long have you guys been…um, separated?” 

Steve blows out a thoughtful breath, looking up towards the ceiling, “About four years this August.”

“I’m sorry,” Darcy says, because she doesn’t know what else to say, and it seems appropriate. 

“Nah, don’t be,” Steve replies nonchalantly, “It’s hard, you know? Being in the military, unable to come home as often as you’d like. Sometimes not even knowing if you’ll even be able to go home. I don’t blame her for the divorce.”

Darcy gets the distinct feeling that somehow, this date has started to turn into a therapy session. Steve had kindness in his eyes though, and Darcy can’t help herself from sympathizing with him. “You shouldn’t blame yourself either,” She says, reaching out with one hand and brushing it up against his. 

He looks up with his blue eyes and smiles at her - right as Fenix rounds the corner and jumps up onto the couch between them. Both Darcy and Steve jump apart both in surprise and to make room for her. 

“Shh!” Fenix says, placing a finger to her lips as she tries to wiggle behind Darcy’s back, “We’re playing hide and seek, and I’m hiding!”

Darcy shifts on the couch as Fenix continues to burrow between her and the couch, holding her coffee up above her head, “Fenix - stop that! You’re going to make me - ”

But it’s too late. Some of the coffee has already splashed over the side of the mug and straight onto Darcy’s white blouse. She groans - it wasn’t hot, but it was still a massive brown stain on the middle of her shirt. “Fenix!” She cries as the little girl continues to try and push her way into Darcy. 

Fenix’s head snaps up, “Uh oh, did I do that?” For some reason her, voice is entirely too insincere. 

“Uh, yeah, yeah you did,” Darcy says, unable to keep the annoyance out of her voice. Her shirt was practically soaked. 

Steve jumps up from the couch, “I have some extra shirts upstairs, if you'd like to borrow one?” 

“No, but thanks anyway,” Darcy says, standing up from the couch and setting her mug down on the coffee table. She huffs out an irritated breath, “I’ll change at home - it’s time for Fenix to go take her nap, anyway.” She puts extra emphasis on the obvious punishment. 

Fenix groans in protest, but Darcy is not easily swayed. She has Fenix go say goodbye to her friend while she says goodbye to Steve at the door. 

“This whole 'spilled coffee' thing seems to be a reoccurring theme, huh?” Steve jokes as he holds the door open for her. Meanwhile, Fenix comes marching down the stairs, a weirdly smug look on her face as she breezes past them outside and to the car.

Darcy looks after her and shakes her head before looking back at Steve, “I guess so. Sorry about all that.” 

“Not a problem,” Steve says politely, leaning against the doorframe. “We’ll have to try this again, another time. Maybe with no coffee involved.” 

“Sounds good to me,” Darcy laughs a little, unlocking her car doors from where she stands so Fenix can get inside. When she looks back, Steve is closer than before, and his lips brush up against her cheek. 

“Oh,” Darcy says a little awkwardly, placing her fingers against her cheek. That had been unexpected. Not exactly unpleasant, but still unexpected. 

“Have a good day, Darcy,” Steve smiles before shutting the door. 

Darcy blows out a low breath, wondering if that had even just happened. Definitely an unconventional date, as far as dates go. She shakes her head, clearing her thoughts as she goes to get in the car. When she does, she notices Fenix sitting with her arms crossed in the backseat, glaring at her. 

“You gunna tell me why you’re acting so different?” Darcy asks, trying not to sound too harsh as she pulls away from Steve’s house. Fenix only glares harder at her through the rearview mirror. 

“What, now you’re giving me the silent treatment?” Darcy comments, “That’s fine…you’re still taking that nap when we get home, though.”

Fenix responds by kicking the back of Darcy’s seat.

“Hey!” Darcy cries, shooting Fenix a surprised glance, “What’s gotten into you?”

Fenix makes an impatient _humph_ noise, “I saw you kiss Margaret’s dad.” 

Darcy scrunches up her eyebrows in confusion, “He just kissed my cheek. Why does that bother you?”

“It just _does_ , okay?” Fenix replies in a huff, looking out the window, “I don’t wanna talk about it anymore.”

“Fine with me,” Darcy mumbles, gripping the steering wheel and driving a little over the speed limit, anxious to get home and change out of her coffee stained shirt. 

As soon as she parks the car in the drive back at home, Fenix is quick to jump out of the car, slam the door behind her, and go marching into the house. Darcy calls out to her as she shuts her car door, “Once I change out of this shirt, it’s nap time for you, buddy!” 

Fenix leaves the front door to the house open behind her, so Darcy just goes straight in. She’s about to turn left and go up the stairs to her room to change when she hears two voices yelling from down the hall to her right. And one of them is distinctly Loki’s. Almost as if she was being possessed, Darcy’s feet carry her farther down the hall, closer to the source of the yelling until she’s pressed up against the closed door of the room they’re in.

“For the millionth time, darling, it’s nothing!”

“Five years, Loki, _five years_ and you won’t let a single picture of us be taken because of your damn _privacy_ issues. But then what do I see this morning? You and that _nanny_ having a romp down at the beach. How do you think that makes me feel?” 

Darcy freezes where she stands, knowing she shouldn’t be eavesdropping, especially on a conversation like this. But they’re so loud, and she just can’t seem to root herself from the spot.

“I assure you, Sigyn, for the last time: the picture means nothing.” 

Sigyn says something in a hushed voice that Darcy doesn’t quite catch. She presses her ear closer, trying to hear some part of their conversation when the doorknob twists in front of her. She jumps back in surprise as Sigyn marches out. 

Sigyn pauses, surprised to see Darcy there. She looks her once up and down, sneering as she walks away, “You’ve got something on your shirt.” 

Her heels sound like they’re stabbing the marble hallway as she walks away. And Darcy stares after her, wanting to fire a comeback, but lacking the right words in the aftermath of being caught eavesdropping. She lets it go, turning back to the inside of the room, where Loki sits on top of a desk. 

“Everything okay?” Darcy asks, and she knows it’s a dumb question, but she asks it anyway. 

Loki sighs heavily, running a hand through his long, black locks. When he looks back up at Darcy, he tries to shrug it off, smiling, “My girlfriend and I are taking a break from each other because thinks I’m cheating on her with the nanny. Scandalous, isn’t it?”

“Ouch,” Darcy says, feeling a blush creep into her cheeks. “What did you tell her?”

Loki pushes himself up off the desk, sauntering over to Darcy. As he walks by, he brushes up against her, leaning down so that his mouth is right next to her ear, “I told her I am absolutely, positively, _not_ sleeping with the nanny.” 

Darcy shivers a little, and - without seeing it - she can feel his wicked grin against her ear before he pulls back and walks out of the room.


	11. Birthday Scares

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! If you follow my tumblr, you'll see I plan to post regular updates here every Sunday! I've been swamped with school, but I've found a nice rhythm with that schedule. Thanks for being the patient dolls you are <3

The weekend before Darcy’s twenty-fourth birthday in the second week of July, both Darcy and Jane find themselves trying to beat the extreme summer heat by lounging in a small, plastic pool on the roof of Jane’s apartment. Jane’s pulled up a lawn chair to the edge of the pool, just dipping her toes into the shallow water. There’s a notebook propped up on her lap, and she’s scratching away, squinting at her equations through her pair of sunglasses.

Darcy is sprawled out in the tiny pool just underneath her. As short as she is, her limbs still spill over the sides of pool in her desperate attempt to cool off. She takes a sip of the already warming diet coke in her hand before tipping her head backwards, lowering her sunglasses, and peering up at Jane.

“You know, Jane, for the optimal cooling sensation, you might want to try giving your brain a chance to relax, too,” Darcy quips, “It’s the weekend anyway, why is your nose buried so deep in that notebook?” 

Jane replies without looking up or putting her pencil down, “I’m taking the night off Wednesday for your birthday party, remember? I’m just trying to get in all the extra work I can now. Is your boyfriend letting you take the night off?” 

Darcy narrows her eyes at Jane, but Jane’s still focused on her notebook, save for a sly smile on her face. Darcy huffs out a breath, shifting in the pool so she manages to cram both legs into the water, “He’s not my boyfriend.”

Of course Jane is referring to the magazine cover that had rocked newsstands only two weeks prior. Nobody else had been able to connect the profile of the mysterious woman on the beach to Darcy, not even Tony. Darcy suspected her mother might have thought something was suspicious, but thankfully she hadn’t brought it up. But Jane, on the other hand, had known instantly. 

Darcy had to admit the truth to her best friend, even though Natasha probably would have killed her. She told Jane all about the harmless beach trip, trying to bring together Loki and Fenix. But her mouth betrayed her, and she ended up blabbing on more than necessary about the way he’d been looking at her lately…how he’d brush up against her in the hallways, their spontaneous pancake batter fight, how he’d been so sub-textually flirtatious the day he and Sigyn broke up. By the end of her spiel, Jane had been staring at her with a knowing look on her face. 

“Uh huh,” Is all Jane says now, kicking up some water with her foot and lightly splashing Darcy, “You know where I stand on this. Just be careful. There’s something about that guy I don’t trust. Like he’s got some serious deep-seeded issues and secrets.” 

Darcy just rolls her eyes and shrugs, but deep down, she feels a little bell in the back of her mind ring true at Jane’s words. She chooses to ignore it for now. “Whatever. And no, I’m going to ask for Wednesday night off when I go back on Monday, but I’m sure it’ll be fine. He’s been making an effort to spend more time with Fenix, so I’m sure he’ll like some solo time with her that night.”

__________________________________

On Tuesday, Loki accompanies Darcy to take and pick up Fenix from her art class in his continual effort to be more involved in his daughter’s life. Wanting to keep a low profile, he comes dressed in aviators and a ball cap, which causes Darcy to burst out laughing. If anything, he looks more conspicuous than ever. He had playfully shoved into her at her outburst, a scowl on his face.

While they wait for Fenix outside the studio, Darcy nudges him with her elbow, pointing down the hall away from where the other parents are waiting. The students’ artwork line the walls, and Loki takes off his shades as they walk closer so he can see better.

“This is one of Fenix’s,” Darcy says, pointing to an oil painting that mirrored a Van Gogh piece, with fields and flowers and a cloudy sky. Loki’s face lights up with awe as he stares at it, and Darcy in turn stares at his expression. It’s very subtle, but the way his eyes soften lets Darcy know that deep down, the man in front of her has a heart capable of love, no matter how shrouded it might be in secrecy now. It makes her stomach flip ever so slightly at the thought. 

“She did this?” Loki asks, the quiet wonder present in his voice. 

“She did,” Darcy says proudly, looking from him to the painting, “It’s not the piece she’s submitting for the art showcase next month - she won’t let me see that one yet - but it’s one of my favorites she’s done this summer.”

They stand there admiring the painting in the silence. Darcy shifts her weight from her left foot to her right, and when she does, her hand brushes up against Loki’s. Her knee-jerk reaction is to pull back her hand and scoot farther away, but she hesitates. Somehow, they always end up closer together than she anticipates. But in her split-second moment of indecision, he does something that surprises her. Without looking, his fingers reach out and brush back up against hers - too calculated for it to be any sort of accident. It causes what feels like a jolt of electricity to race up her arm.

She looks down in surprise and then up at him, but he’s still staring at the painting. “It’s beautiful,” Loki says softly. And the way he says it as he looks down from the painting to her makes her heart flutter wildly in her chest. 

She’s about to say something back, anything really, but when she opens her mouth, she’s interrupted by the sound of footsteps behind them. 

“Darcy?” A voice calls out. It’s Steve.

Instantly, Darcy pulls back from Loki, putting reasonable distance between them. She’s not looking at him anymore, but she can still feel his eyes boring into her from the corner of her vision. She clears her throat and looks up at Steve, who’s walking hand in hand with his daughter, “Hey! What’s up?”

“Fenix is out of class,” He says politely, nodding back in the direction of the classrooms. “And I wanted to let you know that I’ll be on base for the next few weeks, but you can count on that date when I get back.” As if suddenly noticing Loki and not wanting to be rude, Steve holds out a hand, “I’m sorry, I’m Captain Steve Rogers.”

“Loki Laufeyson,” Loki says, extending his hand and shaking Steve’s with one brisk pump. “I’m Fenix’s father.” 

Oblivious to Loki’s chilly demeanor, Steve smiles warmly, “You’ve got a lovely girl. Nice to meet you.” He nods at Loki before turning back to Darcy with a smirk, “I’ll see you soon then.” 

As Steve walks away, Darcy can see Loki staring at him as he goes, arms folded across his chest. When he looks back at Darcy, his expression is unreadable, though he does lift an eyebrow, “Captain Steve Rogers, eh?” 

His voice is neither condescending nor malicious…if anything, it’s inquisitive. There are underlying tones to the question, but Loki isn’t exactly an open book of emotions. He walks away after that, back into the main room to greet Fenix, leaving Darcy standing there feeling oddly conflicted. It’s impossible to tell just what he was thinking, but for some reason, Darcy can’t shake the feeling that whatever moment they were having had just been ruined.

__________________________________

On Wednesday afternoon, Darcy takes at least two hours getting ready for her birthday night out and deciding what exactly she wants to wear. Like she’d suspected, Loki had given her permission to take the night off. A peak out of her window shows Loki sitting in a lawn chair while Fenix splashes out in the pool. He seems to have things under control, which is a good sign of something a long time coming.

Darcy finally decides on a form-fitting, strapless black dress. It zipped all the way up the back, but she’d worn it so many times she’d become a master of zipping it herself. She pairs it with one of her favorite pairs of black heels and bright red lipstick, and she smiles at her reflection in the mirror as she tosses her wavy hair out around her shoulders. 

Her phone buzzes, and she looks down to see a text from Jane. A few of their friends from college and high school were all meeting up at some bars downtown, and Jane was already on her way. Quickly, Darcy swipes herself with her deodorant, spritzes her wrists and neck with her favorite perfume, grabs her purse, and heads down the stairs. 

She’s compelled to say goodbye to Fenix first though, and though she’s hesitant to admit it to herself, she also secretly wants to show off her outfit in front of Loki. Most days she’s wearing simple jeans, skirts, v neck shirts or cardigans…but never anything this nice. Definitely never anything this sexy. So it’s with a small, sly smile that she pushes back the patio door and walks out onto the pool deck, hoping he takes note. 

“Hey peanut, I’m leaving for the night,” Darcy calls out, waving at Fenix. Fenix waves back, splashing over closer. Loki looks up from the book he’s reading in his lawn chair, lowering his shades.

“Miss Lewis,” He drawls in greeting, pushing his shades back up, “Happy birthday.” 

That’s it? She fidgets in her dress, pursing her lips, “Thanks. I’m going out for the night, just a reminder. I’ll be back tomorrow.” 

Loki makes a noise of acknowledgment as he looks back down at his book. Meanwhile, Fenix is pushing herself out of the pool, “Darcy! I have a present for you - ouch!” She walks over to where Darcy stands by Loki, picking at a red spot on her arm. She’s dripping wet, so Darcy throws a towel over her shoulders.

“You alright?” Darcy asks, lifting up the girl’s arm and looking at the little red welt.

“I think I got stung by a bee,” Fenix sniffles a little, poking at her arm. Loki looks over with concern, pushing himself out of his chair.

“Do we need to take the stinger out?” He asks, hovering over Darcy’s shoulder. 

Darcy takes a closer look, not seeing and sign of the residue stinger. Fenix is quick to pull away though, bouncing up and down with eager anticipation, “No, no! I'm fine. Let me go get Darcy her present before she leaves! Hang on!”

With that, Fenix takes off into the house, the towel still wrapped around her shoulders. Both Loki and Darcy stand up straight, and she suddenly feels very awkward. He’d been unreasonably distant towards her ever since Monday afternoon - ever since Steve. Is it possible he could be jealous? Darcy had been quick to dismiss that theory earlier, but now…

“Do you have extravagant plans tonight, Miss Lewis?” He asks, and Darcy reasons this just must be his backhanded way of noticing her outfit. She can’t help but roll her eyes halfway.

“Yeah, actually,” She says nonchalantly, “I have a few things planned with a bunch of people downtown. It should get pretty wild,” She says, realizing now that she’s trying to puff herself up in front of him, “I mean, there’s probably going to be tons of people coming. All of my friends, and - ”

She’s interrupted by Fenix, who has returned with a drawing. She smiles as she holds it up for Darcy to see, “I drew this picture of you! See, look…there’s you in a pretty dress…holding a balloon…blowing out the candles on your birthday cake…”

“I love it, peanut, thank you!” Darcy says, but she can’t help but notice something is off about Fenix. Loki notices it too as he stands beside her. Fenix is excited to be presenting her drawing, but her breathing has also become very labored. When Darcy takes the picture from her hand, she lets her fingers linger on the girl’s pulse - and it’s abnormally rapid. That’s when her eyes fall on Fenix’s bee sting again - even redder than before.

Darcy exchanges a worried look with Loki, “Is she allergic to bees?”

“I…I don’t know,” Loki says, and this is the first time Darcy has ever seen panic in his eyes. When Fenix takes a step forward and wobbles in front of him, he’s quick to scoop her up in his arms. 

In a matter of seconds, the situation seems to have gone from bad to worse. Both Darcy and Loki (with Fenix cradled in his grasp) exchange one silent look with desperate undertones: Fenix needs instant medical attention. They both race into the house and head towards the garage. Darcy pauses in the kitchen, flinging open the cupboards, “Go! Get her in the car.”

When she meets them again in the garage mere seconds later, she’s got a bottle of Benadryl in her hand. Loki has Fenix buckled in the backseat of his Jaguar, and Darcy slides in beside her as he climbs into the passenger seat and slams the door behind him. 

“Here sweetie, take this,” Darcy instructs, trying to keep the worry out of her voice as she pours out measured doses of the antihistamine. As Fenix swallows the medicine, the effect is seemingly instantaneous as her eyes begin to droop. She leans against Darcy’s shoulder as Loki expertly peels out of the driveway and accelerates down the road, weaving through traffic. 

It’s a battle to keep Fenix awake, but Darcy knows she has to. Loki steals worried glances in the rearview mirror every few minutes, and Darcy wishes she could find some way to reassure him, but even she is scared out of her mind. This all happened so fast, and so unexpectedly, and the fragility of the little girl in her arms is absolutely terrifying for the both of them. 

When they arrive at the hospital, Loki deftly scoops Fenix up into his arms like she’s a porcelain doll, and the two of them race her into the emergency room. The doctors rush to their aid, and Loki is actually hesitant to release Fenix from his grip, kissing the top of her head and hurriedly whispering something that sounds a lot like “I can’t lose you, too.”

As the doctors strap Fenix to a gurney, Loki is asked a series of questions about the incident and her pertinent medical records. After what seems like eons, Darcy and Loki are finally escorted to a waiting room while the doctors race to save Fenix. The both of them sit down together on a couch, too numb and in shock to even process what had just happened. 

Darcy is shaking without even realizing it. Fenix’s entire arm had swollen around the sting by the time they’d arrived, and red splotches had begun to form around her face and neck. The poor girl, as it turns out, was deathly allergic to bee stings - and hadn’t even known until now. And even then, it might be too late. Darcy shakes her head, forcing herself not to think that way.

She steals a glance at Loki, who is sitting with his elbows resting on top of his knees, leaning over with his face buried in his hands. When he sits up straight and runs his hands down his face, Darcy can see the red, angry streak of tears across his cheeks. 

“I’m her _father_ ,” Loki says, his shaking voice exploiting his emotions, “I should have known. How could I not have known? I could have stopped this. I still don’t know my daughter at all, not nearly as well as I thought. God, this is all my fucking fault. If she…if she - ” His voice catches on the last word, breaking slightly, and he shakes his head at the unfinished sentence. 

“Stop,” Darcy says, her voice firm and gentle, “You couldn’t possibly have known this was going to happen. This was her first bee sting. Do not blame yourself for this.”

Without thinking, Darcy reaches out and places her hand on top of his. He doesn’t push it away. He doesn’t shake it off. Instead, he laces his fingers between hers, allowing her thumb to draw soothing circles on the top of his hand. All of this without a second thought or hesitation from either of them. Like it was the most natural thing in the world.

When the doctor comes out a little under an hour later, both Darcy and Loki jump up to greet him, their hands still intertwined. And when he tells them that Fenix will be perfectly fine, the aura of relief is palpable as both of them exhale at the same time. 

The doctor gives Loki an EpiPen and a few informational pamphlets for the future, explaining what to do should this ever happen again. Loki wants to see her immediately, but the doctor explains that they’d like to keep Fenix overnight, just to monitor her vitals. She was sleeping soundly now, and wouldn’t wake until morning. 

Before the doctor leaves, he offers up a few last words, “Administering the Benadryl is what saved your child’s life. It spared her just enough time for you to arrive here. Your daughter is alive because of that quick thinking. You’re lucky folks.”

Before the doctor has even turned to walk away, Loki is pulling Darcy into his chest in a fierce hug, wrapping her up into him as he whispers into her hair, “Thank you, Darcy.”

Darcy squeezes her eyes shut tight, a few residue tears spilling out of them. Everything is going to be alright. Everything is going to be okay. The waves of relief roll off between their bodies, reassuring each other of the fact. In her purse, she can feel her phone vibrating - no doubt a reminder of the birthday party she’s supposed to be attending. But she ignores it, only wrapping her arms tighter around Loki’s back, nestling her head in the crook of his shoulder and breathing in deep.

This is exactly where she needs to be right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not to be a tease...but the next chapter will maybe totally probably definitely payoff in terms of the slow burn. Be sure to stick around.


	12. Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it, you guys. The chapter you've probably all been waiting for since Chapter One. Where that slow burn finally comes to a boil. And needless to say, this chapter is chalk-full of said boil. I do hope you enjoy.

Darcy and Loki leave the hospital after they both sneak in to say goodnight to a sleeping Fenix. The doctor had prohibited any visitors between tonight and tomorrow morning, but all Loki had to do was saunter up to the nurse’s station and smile at the young nurse, and they were allowed in before he could even finish asking. 

Loki becomes more visibly relaxed after he’s able to see his little girl, sleeping peacefully, far from harm’s reach. And Darcy does too. She hadn’t realized the full extent to which she really cared for that little ball of trouble until tonight. The thought of losing Fenix like that had been unbearable. With a small, easy smile at Loki (which he returns), the two of them head towards the car with the reassuring knowledge that they’ll see Fenix again in the morning. 

They drive in a comfortable silence for the majority of the ride. The sun had begun to set when they had left the house earlier, and now the sky is a deep, dark blue as they weave through the neighborhoods. She lets her head rest against the window, gazing up at the stars and moon. Darcy can’t help but notice that Loki seems to be taking a different route - a longer route - as they drive, and Darcy wonders if it might be on purpose, because he doesn’t seem to be lost. 

As they pull through the gates of his house, Darcy’s cell phone buzzes, completely jolting her upright. She’d almost completely forgotten that tonight was her birthday - and that she was easily hours late to her own party. 

“Shit,” She mumbles, reaching for her phone and finding ten texts and five missed calls from Jane. 

As Loki parks his car next to hers in the garage, he looks between Darcy and her own car, as if also remembering she has places to be tonight. They both get out of the car, Darcy lingering as she scrolls through a myriad of texts ( _Where are you? I know you like to be fashionably late but this is ridiculous. Okay, just text me back to let me know you’re not dead. One letter will do, just anything_ ). 

Darcy looks up to Loki with a grimace, and Loki smiles politely back, the gesture seemingly too forced for him. He nods his head like he understands, walking towards the house door, “I’ve already made you late enough. Goodnight, Miss Lewis.”

Darcy looks at him hesitantly, for some reason wishing she could say more, especially after all that they’ve been through tonight. Something just feels incomplete. But he’s already shutting the house door closed behind him. She sighs as she leans against Loki’s car, lifting her phone back up and pressing down on the call button. 

Jane picks up after a single ring, “DARCY LEWIS? OH MY GOD, YOU’RE NOT DEAD?” 

Jane’s yelling is partially because of the thunderous background club ambience, and partially because she’s drunk - and Darcy can easily tell when Jane is drunk. It causes Darcy to hold her phone slightly away from her ear, “Yep. It’s me. Alive and well.” 

Jane sighs into the phone, and Darcy can tell she’s trying to find a quieter area of the bar. Once the background noise fades a little, Jane starts talking again, “Where have you _been_? We’ve already been to like, _three_ bars tonight.” 

“Let's just say I got tied up at work. It’s a long story,” Darcy laments wearily into the phone, pinching the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger. She can’t help but notice the irony of the role reversal between she and Jane tonight. This is definitely the first time Darcy hasn’t been the drunk one egging her friend to come out and party. And for once she doesn’t feel like going out at all after the night she’s had. “Listen, dude, the night’s almost over. And it sounds like everyone’s already happily wasted. I’ll just come out with you another night, okay?”

“Are you _suuure?_ ” Jane asks, a bit of a whine in her voice. She is definitely, completely drunk. It causes Darcy to laugh a little. 

“Totally sure,” Darcy reassures her friend, “Tell everyone hey from me, okay? And make sure you get home safe.”

Jane hiccups - actually _hiccups_ \- into the phone, “Okay, Darce. Happy birthday. I love you a lot, okay?” 

Darcy laughs lightly, “I love you too, Jane. Text me when you get home.”

Darcy softly clicks her phone off and takes a cathartic breath. She glances over to her own car, weighing her options. She could go home. She _should_ go home. Technically, she still has the whole night off. There’s no reason for her to be here anymore. 

So why are her feet steering her straight towards the house door?

She finds Loki standing behind the kitchen counter, pouring a bottle of scotch into a glass. He raises his eyebrows in curiosity but doesn’t look at her as she enters. She comes and sits on a stool on the opposite side of the counter.

“I didn’t take you for a scotch kind of guy,” She comments, letting her arms cross in front of her as she leans on the countertop. 

“There’s much about me that would surprise you, Miss Lewis,” Loki says darkly before taking a sip of his drink, “Now, you, on the other hand…didn’t you have some wild birthday celebration to be attending? I’d assumed you’d already left by now.” 

Darcy blows out a slow rush of air stored in her cheeks, “There’s really no point in going. Everyone’s already partied out. Besides, I just…I just don’t feel like it, you know?”

Loki raises one eyebrow inquisitively, his fingers tapping idly around the rim of his glass, “No boyfriend to mourn your absence tonight?” 

Darcy can feel her cheeks flush, her eyes downcast, “…I don’t have a boyfriend.”

Loki pulls out another glass, pouring some of the top shelf scotch into it and handing it over to Darcy. His fingers brush up against hers as he pulls away, sending a tingling sensation that races all the way up her arm and down her spine. He then raises his own glass, tipping it towards hers, “Shame.” 

The way he says it, like he’s not sorry in the slightest, makes Darcy’s heart skip a beat in her chest. Those green eyes of his are locked on hers as they both take a sip of their alcohol. 

“Holy shit that’s good,” Darcy blurts out under her breath after she swallows, and Loki chuckles in response. She settles more comfortably onto the stool, shrugging her purse off of her shoulder and flopping it up onto the countertop. Instantly, the metallic latch snaps open and the contents of her purse come tumbling out. 

“Sorry,” She mumbles, shoving the likes of her cell phone, makeup, keys, wallet and other knickknacks back inside. Loki’s hand reaches out, and she thinks he’s about to help her, until he pulls out a small, ziplock baggie. He holds it up, his expression unreadable as he rubs the contents through the package between his fingers.

The weed. The blood drains out of Darcy’s face in a cold panic. She’d forgotten that she’d packed it along for her birthday tonight, hoping she could get Jane to take a celebratory hit or two with her. Shit. 

“It’s not what it looks like…I mean…I can explain,” Darcy stutters, “I’m not…I would never smoke that around Fenix, I promise. I’m not a drug dealer either. Oh god, I swear, I would never even have that with me if - ”

Loki cuts her off with a low, amused laugh. “You tend to ramble when you’re nervous, did you know that, Miss Lewis? It’s actually quite…endearing.” 

“Oh,” Darcy takes a nervous sip of her scotch, swallowing hard. She can feel the alcohol warm the inside of her cheeks, probably mixing nicely with the blush that has made its permanent stay on the outside of her face, “So…you’re not mad that I smoke pot? It’s not all the time, I swear. Just whenever I feel like winding down or - ” 

Loki levels a stare at her, cutting her off again, “You do remember who you’re talking to, I presume?”

“Right,” Darcy breathes, feeling a little more lax. Loki Laufeyson, god of rock and roll. There’s no doubt that he’d had his fair share of drugs during his time in the spotlight. This thought makes her feel a little easier as he tosses the baggie back to her, a wicked grin on his face.

“It’s been a while,” Loki admits, cocking his head to the side, “But I do believe I have a stack of rolling papers around, as well as a lighter. That is, if you’d care to indulge me?” 

“You’re serious?” Darcy asks in disbelief, the nervous feeling in her stomach transitioning into relaxation and amusement. 

“I suppose there’s only one way to find out,” Loki responds cryptically, almost seductively, as he makes a motion for her to follow him down the hall. She’s out of her seat before he’s even taken a full step.

As it turns out, Loki is an expert joint roller. Like, supremely artful. Not that this really surprises Darcy, but there’s something in the way he rolls the joint and balances it so casually with a limp wrist that Darcy finds undeniably attractive. 

They wind up sitting next to each other in the den on a small couch facing his movie theater screen, and the lights automatically dim around them. Darcy can’t help but notice that it’s the perfect atmosphere for getting baked. “Alright, favorite movie to watch while high?” Darcy asks, nodding towards the screen, “There’s no way we’re doing this without a good flick.” 

Loki grabs the remote, turning on the screen, “I don’t believe I’ve ever admitted this to anyone before, but _Star Wars_. My brother and I used to watch it together when we were teenagers.” 

“Shut up,” Darcy says, looking at him in shock, “That’s _my_ go-to stoner movie.”

“One through three or four through six?” Loki asks, narrowing his eyes like it’s the most important question.

“Number three is my favorite,” Darcy says proudly over Loki’s groan.

“Number _three?_ ” He asks, his tone of voice questioning her taste, “Nothing compares to the original trilogy.”

“Fine,” Darcy relents with a playful eye roll, “Let’s compromise. My second favorite is the _Empire Strikes Back_. But ONLY because I love little old Yoda in the swamp.”

Loki smirks subtly, pushing a few buttons on the remote to get the movie to start playing. As the iconic scrolling sequence fills the screen, Loki takes out a lighter, sparking the end of the joint as he blows in. It’s mesmerizing, the way his cheeks hollow as he sucks in, his cheekbones creating a sharp, shadowy contrast across his face. He coughs a little, smoke clouding around them and his eyes watering, “Fuck, this weed is awful. Exactly how old is it?” 

Darcy laughs, taking the joint from him, “Older than it should be. Sorry, it’s all I had on me.” 

He shakes his head, watching her as she wraps her lips around the joint in a long drag, “I suppose it’ll have to do.” 

They pass the joint between them, taking hits at the appropriate times. They mainly watch the movie in silence, but at the beginning, Darcy is hyper-aware of her body position in relation to Loki’s. Of course, as she gets more and more stoned, her inhibitions seem to slip away with the clouds of smoke mingling in the air. 

By the time Luke Skywalker is in the swamp with Yoda, Loki has angled himself so that their thighs are touching. When Han Solo is being frozen in carbon, Loki’s arm has found its way across the back of the couch, resting just above her shoulders. And right as Darth Vader confesses to being Luke’s father, Loki’s hand is resting comfortably on her right shoulder. 

Darcy feels numb and hazy, but in the best ways possible. In her stoned state, she finds herself even more receptive to his touch than usual. Her skin buzzes every time it comes into contact with his, and in combination with the weed, it kicks her hormones into overdrive. She leans into him a little as the movie comes to a close, fitting snugly into his side. 

It’s only when the credits start to roll does he kiss her. 

It's a sudden move, but it doesn't feel unexpected. His lips are soft and pliant on her own, gently but firmly staking their claim. She doesn’t kiss back - not yet - instead letting his lips move against hers. It feels like a dream - hazy, unreal, too perfect. He reaches up with two fingers to tilt her chin at a better angle, and Darcy can feel her skin vibrating under his. Or maybe that was just the weed.

He pulls back, resting his forehead against hers, each of them heavy-lidded as they stare at the other’s mouths. Loki nudges his nose against hers, nuzzling her, breath hot on her skin, “I’ve been wanting to do that all night.” 

Some sort of switch flips in Darcy at those words, something triggered in part by the tone of his voice and the drug in her system. God, does she want this. And she wants it bad. In a bold, swift move, she wraps her arms around his neck, clinging to him tightly as her mouth meets his in a slow, open-mouthed kiss. Their tongues swirl together once, twice, three times, flicking lazily against each other. 

That seems to do the trick for him as well. He wraps his arms around her waist, pulling her onto him until he’s sprawled completely out underneath her, leaning against the arm rest, with Darcy straddling his waist. 

Darcy’s still wearing her tight, short black dress from earlier, so when she widens her stance around him a little farther, there’s nothing between them but her panties and his jeans. As they continue to kiss, Darcy gasps into his mouth as his hands travel down her sides, clutching at her hips. He places his hands firmly on her ass, rocking her up against him, forcing her to feel the growing erection just underneath her. 

She moans a little at the sensation, rolling her hips once more of her own volition, greedily seeking that friction. Loki makes a low rumbling noise, a sound of approval, and soon he’s thrusting up his hips ever so slightly, matching her thrust for thrust. 

It had been so long since she’d been in this type of position with any man. And it had been even longer since it had felt this good. She grinds down own him harder, swiveling her hips until he is left panting in her ear.

“Bedroom?” She asks, her voice low and full of need as she pulls away from the kiss to look at him.

“Bedroom.”

__________________________________

When Darcy wakes up, her thoughts are still foggy. It’s not morning yet, but it’s close. The light in the room is a pale purple, hinting at the sunrise to come within the hour. She rubs her eyes, looking over to see Loki, shirtless, and sleeping soundly next to her.

 _Happy birthday to me,_ She thinks smugly, because she can’t help it. 

Last night had been…incredible. They hadn’t even had sex. Not in the technical term of the word, at least. She remembers finding their way into his bedroom, where they continued to make out for quite a while. She remembers moaning and panting, kissing and biting, hips rolling and grinding through thin layers of clothing. Hand tangled in hair, hands tangled in clothes. It was messy, sloppy, needy, and incredibly, _incredibly_ hot. 

They must have, at some point, transitioned from lazily kissing to falling asleep tangled up in one another. The weed had made them both so tired - as it usually does for Darcy. She remembers wanting to do more, and Loki’s eagerness to oblige, but their exhaustion was too overwhelming and had ultimately won out. 

Not that she didn’t mind. It easily ranked number one in the most incredible make out session she’s ever had in her life.

The sleep still heavy in her eyes, Darcy reaches for the nearest article of clothing strewn at the edge of the bed, and throws the shirt on over her head. It smells like mint and leather, drugs and sex. It’s Loki’s. 

She smiles a little to herself, pushing herself out of the bed, careful not to wake Loki. His room is cozier than she’d imagined - with a lush bed taking up the central portion of the space. It’s also contrastingly cold - not in the literal sense of the word - but in that things seem to be so neat, organized and sterile.

There’s two other doors in his room besides the entrance. She opens one and finds the bathroom - not realizing how badly she had to pee until she actually walked in there. After she’s done in the bathroom, she walks across the room to the second door, pushing it open and peeking inside. 

This must be his private sanctuary - his recording studio. 

She feels a little guilty, stealing a quick glance over her shoulder to make sure Loki’s still sleeping. But she walks into the room anyway, her curiosity winning out. It’s fairly simple studio: a few mics set up, speakers, some recording gear, guitars propped up on the walls. The centerpiece of the room though is another grand piano, similar to the one in the lounge but with a darker wood finish. 

Darcy sits down on the bench, noticing a few sheets of music scattered about on top of the piano above the keys. She reaches out for them, glancing at the unreadable scribbles of music and notes that littered the pages. It looks like the work of a madman, but also a genius. This must be the new music he’s been working on. 

She can feel a presence slide up behind her as she places the pages back down on top of the piano. But of course, she already knows who it is. 

Loki.

In a swift movement, he’s settled himself behind her on the bench, angling himself against her so that she’s sitting between his legs. One strong, lean arm wraps around her waist while his other hand gathers the tendrils of her hair at the base of her neck and pushes them back, revealing her skin. He lazily kisses her on her pulse point, just underneath her jaw, and she tilts her head back for him, letting him have his way. 

Loki makes a growling noise against her skin, almost like a purr, “Do you have any idea how distracting you are in that shirt?” His hand around her waist snakes up to the underside of her shirt, resting cooly against her warm belly, causing her to jolt slightly against him. “What are you doing in here? Come back to bed.” 

The idea doesn’t sound half bad. Darcy cranes her neck around, looking him in the eyes, “I just wanted to see inside your studio. I know you said it was off-limits, but I couldn’t help myself.”

“Naughty little minx, aren’t you?” Loki says, his voice a low rumble against her skin. He doesn’t sound that upset though, which is good. He pulls his hand out from under her shirt, bringing it to rest on the piano, where he elegantly taps a few keys.

“Are those new songs?” Darcy asks, pointing towards the sheet music on top of the piano.

“Mmm,” Loki murmurs in verification, “Would you like to hear a bit of one?” 

Darcy blinks in surprise, nodding her head yes. He brings his hands together on the piano, reaching around Darcy’s waist, and begins to play. It’s short, simple, beautiful. The sound is haunting, with very dark undertones that don’t go unnoticed by Darcy. In a way, it’s slightly melancholic. When he finishes, he lets his hands slide back down and around her waist as the sound of the final keys waft into the air around them. 

“It’s lovely,” Darcy whispers, because it’s true.

“It’s incomplete,” Loki huffs with slight irritation, “But thank you. I just can’t escape the feeling that it’s missing something. I’ve been beating myself up over trying to figure out what, though.” 

Darcy wishes she knew more about music so that she could give him more critical advice. She can sense the incompleteness as well, but what it still needs is unclear to her. She turns her head to the side to look back at him again, “I’m sure you’ll figure it out.” 

Loki kisses her then, meeting her lips with no resistance. She closes her eyes, letting his mouth gently cover hers, sucking softly on her bottom lip. She’s not sure what this all means for them just yet, but right now, she doesn’t really want to think about it. 

She lets the kiss deepen, flicking her tongue inside his mouth and eliciting a low sound of approval from him. Loki’s hands travel back to the underside of her shirt, splaying themselves against the flushed skin of her stomach. When his right hand inches down further, she gasps a little into his mouth. He presses two fingers against the outside of her panties, pushing against her core in the most tantalizing way. 

Loki pulls away from her mouth to trail his lips across her jaw and down her neck, sucking at her skin as his fingers continue to rub her through the fabric. The smile on his face is evident in the way he presses his lips to her exposed skin. She tips her head back against him, panting at the friction he’s causing with his fingers. This man was going to drive her mad. 

Suddenly, the sound of an alarm goes off in the other room, slowly snapping them out of their lazy, lust-fueled touching. It’s the alarm Loki had set to go pick up Fenix from the hospital. As glad as she is that it means they can get Fenix back, Darcy can’t deny the timing had been more than a little inconvenient. She wasn’t ready for this to end yet. 

Darcy groans a little as he straightens up behind her, his touch receding, signaling it’s time for them to get ready for the day. Her sound of disappointment causes him to chuckle darkly in her ear, his voice nothing more than a breathy, promising whisper, “Trust me, darling, I intend for there to be much more where that came from.”


	13. Pillow Talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for not updating this sooner! I was consumed with writing my Halloween oneshot all last week. BUT I'M BACK! And hopefully this chapter whets your appetite for what's to come. Because there is a lot to come. And this chapter helps build the foundation for that. So sit back, relax, (leave kudos and comments), and enjoy :)

Darcy and Loki don’t see each other for exactly four days, nine hours, and fourteen minutes since he seals his ambiguous promise of ‘more where that came from’ with a kiss. And it is easily the most excruciating waiting period of Darcy’s whole life to that point. 

Loki instructs Darcy to take the day off early after they pick up Fenix from the hospital (it’s a Friday, so she was scheduled to go home anyway). Loki wants to spend the whole day with Fenix, showering her with love, attention and affection. And Darcy really can’t argue with that. After she’s made sure to give Fenix plenty of hugs and kisses herself, she heads home for the weekend, her mind thrumming with a jumble of unclear thoughts and emotions.

Loki hadn’t acted any differently after they had picked Fenix up from the hospital. It’s not like Darcy had expected him to kiss her full on the mouth goodbye in front of the little girl, but she still felt uncertain about their relationship. Things had definitely changed between them. But what was it? Were they dating now? Was it just a one time thing? God, she hopes it’s not just a one time thing.

Suffice to say she spends the entire weekend picking over her thoughts, driving herself close to insane. Normally, she would unload all of her feelings and speculations on Jane, but Jane was inconveniently at a science convention that week. She leaves a boatload of vague voicemails she knows Jane will probably never get to ( _Hey, it's me. I need girl talk. Like bad. So, uh, call me back._ ). She never likes to divulge too much over voicemail, because she feels like it takes away from getting the person's true reaction. So Darcy sits and tries to keep her mind off of Loki until Monday finally rolls around. 

Except for she doesn’t even see Loki the entirety of her time with Fenix on Monday. They cook and play and go to her dance class, but still no Loki. Darcy figures he must be cooped up in his recording studio, but she’d at least expected to see him once. Even a passing glance. But it never happened.

On Monday night, Darcy tucks Fenix into bed, kissing her forehead sweetly. The little girl had been extra tired ever since coming back from the hospital, so it was a mere matter of minutes before she was dozing off to sleep. 

Darcy tiptoes out of the room, careful to shut the door behind her without making any loud noises. When the handle clicks into place, she turns around and almost shrieks out loud were it not for the hand that clamps against her mouth, muffling the sound.

Loki stands there, a sly grin on his face, crinkling around the corners of his mouth. When it’s clear Darcy’s not going to make any more loud noises, he removes the hand from her lips.

“Holy shit!” She stage whispers, out of breath. On the inside though, her stomach is already doing flips at seeing him again. And the internal clock counting the minutes since she saw him last finally comes to a halt. “You can’t just sneak up on me like that!” 

“I’m sorry,” He murmurs boyishly, bringing his head down and pressing his nose up against hers, nuzzling her. Her stomach goes from doing flips to almost dropping to the soles of her feet, loving the way his hot breath mingled so close to her own. “I just wanted to see you. I’ve missed you.” 

“Oh,” Darcy breathes right before he presses his lips to hers in a smothering kiss. She squeaks a little as he pushes her against the wall, his hands roaming up and down her body, gently squeezing at her curves. 

“I’ve missed the taste of your lips,” He whispers, pulling back and running his tongue across her lower lip before softly sucking on it. “The little noises you make when I kiss you. Oh, how I’ve dreamt of your breathy little moans.”

As if on cue, Darcy lets out a ragged breath as his lips trail down her jaw, dropping fervent kisses down her neckline. It’s only been a weekend, but damn if she hasn’t dreamt of this too.

“Where were you today?” She whispers as his lips continue to make their mark on her skin. She shudders at his light touch, his fingertips brushing up her arms. “I didn’t see you at all.” 

“I’m afraid I was a slave to the music all day,” Loki apologizes, bringing his head back up pressing his lips to hers again in an open-mouthed kiss. She can sense the desire, the passion, the hungry need for her in the way his tongue enters her mouth and greedily explores it. He pulls back with a moan and his eyes are blazing, “But tonight I have different plans.” 

Darcy bites down on her lower lip, nervous excitement coursing through her veins. Good. Definitely not a one time thing, then. 

They stumble into his bedroom, biting and kissing and groaning, hips grinding against each other in a desperate attempt for friction. It goes from zero to sixty quicker than Darcy thought was ever possible, but his obvious desire was apparent from the minute he cornered her in the hallway, and who was she to deny that? Especially when she wants it just as bad.

He practically throws her onto the bed, and it’s apparent that he means business. Darcy loves every second of it - the wild look in his eyes, the passion that exudes off his body in rolling waves. This is something she could get used to. She leans back on her elbows and throws him her best “come and get it” look. 

And it works. 

He crawls on top of the bed, pushing himself between her legs as he leans in to kiss her once more. She tangles her hands in his hair, pulling him down into her, wrapping herself up in him. At some point he manages to seamlessly push her top up and over her head, revealing her purple camisole underneath. 

“Darling, you are incredibly overdressed,” He says with just a hint of impatience, sliding his hands under the material and up against her warm skin. She sucks in a breath at the sensation, shuddering slightly at the touch.

“Speak for yourself,” She quips back with a small groan, wasting no time in yanking him forward by his belt loops and unclasping his pants button. He hisses a little at her sharp touch, but she can tell it’s something that’s turned him on even more.

Spurred on by her forwardness, Loki leans into her with a kiss, pushing her back down onto the bed until she’s completely on her back, arching up against him. Darcy bucks her hips once against him, making her intentions clear and eliciting a dark and seductive chuckle from him.

“You want this, don’t you?” He whispers the rhetorical question against her lips, and she makes a little whimpering noise in response. He smiles knowingly, tugging on her bottom lip, “And I am all too willing to deliver.” 

Just then, the unmistakable ring of an iPhone fills the room. And it’s coming from Loki’s back pocket. He tries to ignore it, aggressively attacking her mouth once more, kissing her deeply and growling in frustration at the interruption. 

When the ringing stops, it pauses before picking back up again just as suddenly, and Loki breaks the kiss to groan and blow a hot breath of frustration into the crook of her neck.

“You can answer it,” Darcy says, trying to sound encouraging, even though her body is practically screaming at her otherwise. “They’ve called twice, it’s probably important.” 

With a huff, Loki straightens up, yanking the cell phone out of his back pocket. He shoots her a meaningful look, “Don’t think I’m through with you just yet.” 

The darkly seductive way he says it sends a tingle of anticipation racing down Darcy’s spine, and she bites her lip and nods her head at him. She leans back up on her elbows and watches as he takes the call. 

“Yes?” Loki says with sharp irritation, holding the phone up to his ear. Darcy watches his face, the way his eyes dart back and forth as he processes information. “I’ve already told you, if he’s going to be there, then there’s no way I’m making an appearance.” 

He pauses, letting the other person speak, “Oh, I understand perfectly, but I don’t think _you_ do. I’ve said no, and that’s my final word on the matter.” Another pause, and she can see his eyes darken, “Well, then, you can tell Thor and his people to go fuck themselves; that’s not my problem.” 

Darcy instantly perks up with curiosity at the mention of his brother. Whatever this was about, it sounded important. With his final word, Loki clicks the phone shut and tosses it across the room, landing with a thud on the carpet.

“Now, where were we?” He practically growls, moving in to kiss her once more. Darcy turns her head to the side, and he just misses her mouth. He groans at the denied access, dropping his head to her neck and kissing her there, but it all seems too rushed now.

“What was that about?” Darcy asks, curiosity getting the better of her. She realizes what she’s giving up by asking this, and briefly she wonders if she’s crazy for trading sex for conversation. But it’s too late now, anyway. 

“It’s nothing. Politics. The same old shit,” Loki responds, but she can hear the annoyance in his voice. He tries kissing her again, but once more she rejects it. 

“No, seriously, I want to know,” Darcy prods, looking at him intently. This is the closest she’s ever been to Loki, and he seems to be opening up to her more and more every day. But still, there’s so much she doesn’t know about the man in front of her. Something in her nature is compelled to figure out every mysterious facet about him. He's complex, a puzzle, and is it so much to want to be able to piece it all together?

Loki looks up to match her gaze, and groaning in defeat, rolls over into his back at her side.

“You’re a frustrating woman, did you know that?” Loki asks mildly, a little bit of an edge to his voice. He runs his hands through his long hair, blowing a rush of air slowly out of his cheeks as he gazes up at the ceiling.

“Thank you,” Darcy says smugly and with a smile. She catches his ever-so-slight grin in response, and it fills her with more confidence. “So, who was on the phone?” 

“That was my publicist,” Loki finally responds, propping himself up on one elbow so he’s level with her gaze, “Asking me to confirm my appearance at this weekend’s Global Music Awards show in Los Angeles. Apparently, I’m to be honored by being inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.”

The way he says it, with such contempt and agitation, doesn’t seem right to Darcy. “And you’re not bouncing off the walls with excitement because…?”

Loki shoots her a look that prompts her to put the pieces together herself. Which she does. But she just wanted to hear him say it out loud. “Thor?”

“Precisely.” Loki responds with an eye roll. “Seeing as how the award is for both members of the infamous _Odinson_ duo, that incompetent oaf will also be in attendance. I swear it’s all some ridiculous PR stunt to get us in the same room together.” 

“That award is _huge_ though,” Darcy counters, making a grand sweeping gesture with her hands, “Like, pretty much nobody gets inducted at your age. It’s, like, the holy grail of music. So what you have to put up with Thor for a night. How bad could it be?”

“I haven’t seen my brother in six years.” Loki’s eyes narrow, “You don’t understand.” Though he tries to sound defiant, his voice cracks slightly on the last word. 

“So tell me,” Darcy replies without hesitation, her voice full of steely resolve. Loki looks at her, studying her with those emerald green eyes of his. She can almost see the barriers breaking down inside of him, and she knows she has him in the palm of her hand, even if it’s just a tiny part of him. 

“Have I mentioned how frustrating you are?” He says again, this time a little more to himself than anything. With a small sigh, he looks at her, “Where to begin?”

“The beginning.” Darcy says, leaning down and kissing him softly. “We’ve got all night.”

__________________________________

The moon hangs high in the sky, casting a beautiful shadow into Loki’s room as both he and Darcy sit against the headboard, nursing almost empty cups of tea. He’s lit a few candles and incense as well, creating a comforting and calm ambience. Darcy pulls the cashmere blanket tighter around her, cozying up closer to Loki as she leans back against him, resting her head on his shoulder.

“Thor was the golden child,” Loki says, setting his empty cup of tea down on the nightstand, “He always was. Father’s favorite, loved by all.”

Darcy can hear the echoes of pain in his voice and it tugs on her heartstrings. He’d been telling her all about his childhood, growing up in Thor’s shadow, practically ignored by his father. She’d never read stuff like this in the magazines. But then again, it seemed like something that would rather be kept in the family. 

“And I loved my brother too, I suppose,” Loki continues, his voice sounding small and introspective, “How could I not? He taught me so many things. How to drive a car. How to hit a joint properly. He taught me about music. How to play the guitar. He is…was my best friend.”

Darcy swallows his words, having listened to him speak all night. Finally, she looks up at him and asks softly, “So what happened?”

Loki had been open with her all night about so many things - growing up with Thor, his strained relationship with his father, the formation of their band, traveling the world. He'd told her about how both he and Thor had taken on the world together - even how he'd always been jealous of his brother, with his conventional good looks and popularity. But now she can see that stone resolve beginning to harden once more. Somber shadows dance across his face in the candlelight.

“Something truly awful,” Is all he says, his eyes glistening and seemingly far away, reliving a memory that Darcy suspects he’s learned to keep trapped. He snaps his attention back down towards her, and with a hard voice says, “I’d rather not talk about it.”

Darcy had come so close to opening him up completely that she feels a twinge of disappointment now. She decides to wiggle her way around the subject, “Is it really so bad that you’ve decided never to see your brother again? Not even to accept your award into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame?”

“Let’s just say things would get rather uncomfortable rather quickly should I attend that awards show,” Loki comments, “My brother and I have been known to have quite volatile arguments…and I can’t see the evening passing without one. The media would have a field day.” 

Darcy wonders if it has more to do with the fact that Loki would be nervous about confronting his brother after all these years than it does with the media, but she decides to keep her mouth shut for now. She’s already broached so many sensitive subjects with him tonight, and sometimes, it’s a good quality to know when to stop. 

“I think you’d be missing out on the opportunity of a lifetime,” She says kindly, looking up at him with a soft expression, “And I think that, despite whatever happened between you and Thor, you’re tough enough to stick it out for one night.”

Loki looks down at her, his eyes crinkling around the edges as he chuckles softly, “You still don’t know anything about me, Miss Lewis.”

Darcy shrugs at his light tone, “Gotta give me credit for trying.” 

With two fingers he tilts her chin up, angling her in a better position as he presses his lips against hers, softly and with a sense of longing. She kisses him back slowly, savoring the way his lips feel against hers, like it’s a sensation she could have a million times over and still never get used to. 

“So, are we…?” She asks quietly, breaking apart their kiss, “You know…dating?” She’d been afraid to say the word - wondering if it might scare him off. But with the way they’d been acting, she reasons it was a viable question to put on the table. 

“I think we are two consenting adults enjoying each other’s company,” Loki offers up, sounding strangely nonchalant. He nuzzles his face against hers, his hot breath cascading down and ghosting across her lips, “Let’s not make things complicated, darling.” 

Darcy can’t help that her stomach does a little flip of uncertainty at his words. It’s not that she was exactly disappointed - after all, it had only been approximately four days since they had hooked up. Maybe he just needed time. Either way, his charm was currently distracting her, despite her best efforts to let it not. 

“And you think _I’m_ the frustrating one,” She mumbles under her breath, rolling her eyes and earning a small laugh from Loki. It’s only then that she feels the unmistakable sting of tiredness in her eyes, and she looks up at him wearily. 

“We should go to sleep,” She says, yawning a little as she speaks. Glancing towards the clock at his bedside, the late hour only confirms her decision. As much as she’d rather engage in other explicit adult activities with Loki right now, she knows when to obey her body’s need for sleep. 

Loki raises one eyebrow slowly, full of that damnable charm, “You know, it’s only a matter of time before I get you in this bed doing much more than sleeping.”

Darcy cuddles up next to him, sighing contentedly into his chest as he wraps one arm around her shoulder, “Trust me…I definitely look forward to that.”


	14. What Becomes of Curious Minds

The next morning, Darcy wakes up alone in Loki’s bed. It’s still too early to wake Fenix up for the day, so she lets herself relax a little, curling up in his sheets and breathing deeply. His pillows smelled like him - cool and crisp, hinting of mint. It was quickly becoming her favorite scent in the entire world. 

When she eventually does push herself out of bed, she’s startled by a knock on the door, which is simultaneously being opened by none other than Natasha. Darcy's still wearing her jeans and purple camisole from last night, but for some reason she instinctively reaches for a sheet to cover herself with next to where she stands at the foot of his bed. As if this will do absolutely anything to cover up the fact that she's obviously been in his bed.

She grimaces, her brain racing for excuses that will explain why she’s in here _(I thought I dropped my wallet. And it landed in here? No. Shit. Too lame. I got confused at thought this was my room…even though I’ve been living here for almost two months? Crap)_.

“Darcy,” Natasha greets her with professional politeness, saving her from babbling on with some wimpy excuse. Her facial expression is unreadable as she walks into the room, clutching her trusty tablet against her chest. Darcy knows she’s not stupid - she’s the farthest thing from it - so to assume that Natasha has already pieced together what Darcy is doing in Loki’s room is a no-brainer. But, ever-like Natasha, she’s chosen to not address the elephant in the room. Yet. 

Darcy tries to smile, but she still feels nervously embarrassed at being caught in Loki’s room for what could only have one reasonable explanation. She shifts her weight from side to side, lowering the sheet back down to the bed, “Hey, Natasha…I, um…have you seen - ”

“Loki’s out for the day,” Natasha finishes her sentence smoothly, professionally, clicking through a few things on her tablet, “We talked this morning before he left. He cleared everything for you Saturday night, I’m just here to give you a debriefing.”

“Wait, what?” Darcy asks, shaking her head, “What are you talking about…Saturday night?” 

“The Global Music Awards?” Natasha replies with an arched eyebrow, “Did he not tell you? He’s decided to go after all…and you’re his date.” 

His _date_? Darcy stares at Natasha with a slack jaw, processing the information slower than she'd like, “Oh…he told me he wasn’t going…?”

Natasha shrugs her shoulders, looking down at her tablet and scrolling through a few things, “That’s not what he told me this morning. Something…or someone…obviously changed his mind.”

“Ah,” Darcy squeaks out, and she can feel her cheeks burning a hot red. Had she really influenced him so much that he'd decided to brave his older brother and attend the show? Maybe she was smoother than she thought. 

“Listen, Darcy, I’m just giving you a hard time,” Natasha says with the slightest of smirks, “You’re obviously his date for a reason. I didn’t ask any questions. And I’m not going to. Yet. But I need to give you some advice that comes with the situation.”

“Okay?” Darcy says with uncertainty, swallowing hard. Well, it looks like they're diving in head first. There was no beating around the bush with Natasha. 

“I'll be there working, but if you step out with him Saturday night, people are going to start asking questions,” Natasha warns her, “Be prepared to see yourself in magazines with headlines like ‘Loki’s Mystery Girl.’ I advised him against bringing you, but he was adamant. No offense; it just makes my job and his life easier.” Natasha shoots Darcy a sincerely apologetic look before moving on. “I can only do so much damage control. But once you’re seen with him in a high-profile setting like that…you can’t go back.” 

“He actually told you he wanted me to be his date though?” Darcy asks, prioritizing Natasha’s statements like a giddy teenaged girl.

“What, he didn’t ask you himself first?” Natasha asks with a scoff, “Typical.” 

“I just…I mean…I’m not really sure what our relationship is exactly,” Darcy confesses, realizing she’s about to turn this conversation into some serious girl talk in a matter of seconds. 

Natasha lowers her tablet, clicking it shut, “Look, professionally, I’m just here to advise you on how to speak, act, and behave on Saturday night. This is all happening suddenly for you, I can tell. But from one friend to another?” Natasha comes over and places one hand on Darcy’s shoulder, “Watch out for yourself, okay? I’ve known Loki for a long time…and I know his issues with commitment. And labels.”

Well, that certainly doesn’t make Darcy feel any more reassured about their vague relationship status. But it is good to know. She tucks it away in the back of her mind for now. The larger part of her is still overjoyed that he wants her to come with him on Saturday night. That’s got to be a good sign…right? 

She offers up a grin to Natasha, “Thanks for the advice. I think I can handle myself.”

“You’re a tough girl,” Natasha smiles back warmly, “Just don’t let him…and this crazy, high-profile world…make you forget that about yourself, okay?” 

“Okay,” Darcy breathes, feeling like she’s being prepped to go into battle. Which, for all intents and purposes, she might be. But it’s accompanied by a feeling of nervous excitement. Her stomach fills with butterflies, and her her heart feels like a rising balloon in her chest while her mind fights to keep her grounded.

Which might also be an accurate way to describe what falling in love feels like. Now there's a jarring thought. 

And yet, Darcy can’t stop the smile from spreading across her face.

__________________________________

There’s only one blip on the way to Saturday night, and it comes in the form of Steve Rogers.

Darcy’s waiting for Fenix to get out of her art class when he walks through the doors and makes his way straight towards her. 

It’s not really fair to call it a blip. In fact, it makes Darcy feel tinged with guilt. Steve is a classic gentleman: says all the right things, does all the right things, exudes impossible flawlessness. Darcy really should be more attracted to him than she was. 

But the simple matter of the fact is: she’s not. And she's always been good about knowing when she's not attracted to people. 

His smile was warm and kind, his blue eyes sparkled with enthusiasm. But she couldn’t help but feel they lacked a fundamental connection that lovers so critically need. There had been nothing but surprise and awkwardness when he had last kissed her cheek on his front porch. She could see herself being friends with him easily. In fact, in an ideal world, that would be perfect. 

And especially now that her feelings for Loki have blown up on her radar, she knows for sure that she could never see herself having a thing with Steve.

The hardest part was just going to be telling him that. 

“Steve!” She greets him with a little too much forced enthusiasm, and she silently curses herself for it. 

“Darcy,” He greets her with a warm smile, “Free this weekend?”

Darcy breaks eye contact with him, biting hard on her lower lip, “I’m…not, actually.”

Steve looks at her with just a flash of disappointment of the ‘blink and you’ll miss it’ variety, “Oh. During the week then? I’m usually tied up with Margaret but I can make an exception…”

“I’m - I can’t,” Darcy says with a rush of breath. She knows it’s better to just set things straight now rather than to drag him along any further. It still doesn’t make it any easier on her though. “Steve, I’m not going to lie to you…I’m sort of…seeing someone right now.” 

“Oh,” Is all Steve says, a short and simple revelation. Darcy can see his face drop slightly though, and she can’t help but compare the feeling of watching his smile fade to accidentally kicking a dog. 

“I’m sorry, I really am,” Darcy continues, unable to stop her mouth from trying to justify herself, “It’s more or less a recent thing. I think you’re an amazing guy though, really, don’t think this has anything to do with you. But I just think…I just think…”

“You think we’d be better off as friends?” Steve finishes her sentence for her, his voice sounding way too sympathetic than she deserves. He even smiles a little in the face of her rejection. “I understand. It doesn’t help that my military schedule lends to less than ideal relationship conditions, either. ’Suppose this whole thing was just ill-fated from the beginning, huh?”

Darcy nods her head, “I just didn’t want you getting the wrong idea. I mean, I look at you, and it’s like, wow, I’m looking at a man sculpted by Greek gods.” Steve humbly laughs a little at that as she continues, “And then on top of that, you’re one of the nicest guys I’ve ever met. But I just don’t feel it. And I can’t lie to myself. Or to you.” 

Steve lets out a low breath, taking it all in, “Well then, Darcy Lewis, I suppose I should thank you for being honest with me.”

“Um…you’re welcome?” Darcy responds with uncertainty, and it earns an honest chuckle from Steve. At that moment, the kids from the class start flooding out, and Steve reaches out to hug his daughter as she comes bounding towards him. 

“Whoever you’re with is a lucky man,” Steve says, turning to face Darcy once more before he walks out, “I’m sure he appreciates the woman he has. And I’m sure I’ll see you around. I could always use more friends in my life. Take care, Darcy.” 

“You too,” Darcy says quietly, still feeling the twinge of guilt at having to turn him down. Part of her wonders if she’s crazy. Guys like Steve don’t come around too often.

But then again, neither do guys like Loki.

__________________________________

Darcy doesn’t get a chance to talk to Jane before Saturday. Jane’s still living in nerd paradise at her science conference for the week, and if she’s bad about checking her phone usually, she may as well forget it even exists at times like these. Which is usually mega-unfortunate for Darcy.

But the closer she gets to Saturday, the more she feels like keeping her and Loki’s unusual affair to herself before it potentially goes public at the awards show. She’s not quite sure how to put it into words even…and she knows Jane would be good at that. But right now it feels almost too good to be true - like if she told anyone, it might become less real. So for now, for as long as she can, she decides to keep it her own little secret. 

She doesn’t even get a chance to see Loki during the week. She’s so busy with Fenix that they completely miss each other until Friday afternoon when she gets off her shift - where he’s waiting outside, leaning against his black Jaguar, sunglasses framing his face like a slick James Dean character. 

“Hello, darling,” He greets her with his casual tone, but the smile on his face lets her know he’s just as excited to see her as she is him. 

“You’ve been gone all week,” Darcy muses, walking over to stand in front of him, “Wasn’t sure if you were ever coming back.”

“And forget about you? Never,” Loki admonishes her, and Darcy swears she’d never actually experienced her heart fluttering in her chest until that moment. “I had too much to take care of this week in preparation for the show. I’m sorry I couldn’t see you sooner…”

He wraps his arms around her waist, pulling her in closer to him for a kiss. Darcy smiles as she leans into him, wrapping her arms around his neck. She has to stand on her tiptoes a little, which she decides she rather likes. 

“I’m to take it Natasha informed you that you’ll be my date tomorrow evening?” Loki asks, breaking the kiss as Darcy rocks back down onto the soles of her feet.

“She did…and I’m flattered,” Darcy admits, shaking her head, “But the last I heard, you were pretty dead-set on not going. What changed your mind?” 

Loki takes off his sunglasses, wiping them on the hem of his shirt before tucking them neatly into the v-neck of his shirt. He looks down at her with those stunning green eyes that make Darcy’s stomach drop like an elevator, “You did.” 

“Oh, stop it, you,” Darcy chides with a mixture of humbleness and mock flirtation, swatting the air with one hand. When Loki continues to gaze at her with sincerity, Darcy loses some of her joking tone, “Seriously?” 

“There’s something about you, Miss Lewis, that I find irresistibly drawn to,” He says, running a hand through a loose strand of her hair and tucking it behind her ear. He then adds with a low rumble, “Perhaps more than one thing, if I'm being quite honest. But the point is, I feel… _better_ …when I’m with you. More capable. More reassured.”

“Oh,” Darcy says, trying to process his compliment. What Loki was admitting to her sounded like he had been thinking about it for a while. And to hear that from him - to hear what she meant to him - made her heart feel lighter than a feather. 

“You were right, this is a once in a lifetime achievement…and I’ve known that…but I was ready to resign to the shadows instead, letting my brother stand in my way again,” Loki admits, looking down at her with honesty, “But I feel like I can handle this if you’re by my side.”

Darcy pushes herself back up onto her tiptoes and kisses him sweetly and softly on the lips, “You sure know how to sweet talk a girl, don’t you?” She pauses, feeling the question she’d been wanting to ask slip off her tongue, “Does this mean we’re dating now?” 

Loki chuckles, unwrapping her from his embrace and opening the passenger side door for her, “To be honest, I’m not overly fond of labels. Though I suppose you are technically my date.” Darcy’s hope sinks a little in her chest at his noncommittal nature. But maybe she was foolish for thinking things would change so suddenly, especially with Natasha’s warning. She brushes off the feeling for now as he gestures with one hand inside the car door, “Shall we?” 

“Wait, we’re leaving now?” Darcy asks, eyes wide with surprise. “I thought it wasn’t until tomorrow night?”

“It’s not,” Loki admits with a sly smile, “But I thought we could make a trip out of it; I’ve already paid for the hotel room. I’ve had my stylist provide you with your wardrobe for the show. And I’ve found a sitter for Fenix tomorrow night. All the bases are covered, darling.” 

“You’ve found a nanny to cover for the nanny? Now I know things are serious,” Darcy semi-jokes, as if to take a lighthearted dig at his previous comments. He slides into the driver’s seat, a sly smile etched onto his face, and despite it all, Darcy can’t help but feel herself falling a little bit deeper into the rabbit hole.

__________________________________

“You’ve never been to L.A. before?” Loki asks with a hint of incredulousness as they wait for the elevator in the lobby of their swanky hotel.

Darcy watches as the little dot at the top of the outside of the elevator steadily makes its descent, “Nope. Just to go to the airport.”

The elevator pings to a stop, the doors smoothly sliding open and revealing an elevator carriage with a glass view of the city outside. Darcy’s eyes fill with wonder like a child’s as she steps in, instantly moving to press her face against the glass. She can hear Loki chuckling behind her as he steps in and presses the button to the correct floor. 

“The obviousness shows,” He responds with light sarcasm, and it would usually earn an unamused look from Darcy if she wasn’t so transfixed by the sight of the city falling away below them as the elevator rose. 

If everything felt too good to be true before, now it felt like a fairy tale. In almost a week since her 24th birthday, she’d gone from nannying for Loki Laufeyson to becoming his date for the Global Music Awards. With a healthy dosage of make out sessions sprinkled in between. 

Darcy leans further against the glass, and a small part of her worries she might fall over the edge completely if she’s not too careful. 

“I have a few things planned, if you’d like,” Loki says, snapping her out of her reverie as the doors open at the top floor of the hotel. They walk down the long hall together as he continues, “There’s a wonderful restaurant I’d love to take you for dinner. Incredibly intimate setting. And their red wine is the best I’ve ever had.”

Loki pauses as they approach a set of double doors, and he slides the keycard out of his pocket before continuing, “And then, of course, there’s this independent art museum I think you’ll love. L.A.’s best kept secret if you ask me, though I’m sure some of the artists might wish otherwise.” 

He pushes open the door of the suite to reveal a stunning, wide open and sprawling living room, adorned in whites and golds. There’s a breathtaking bay window facing the city skyline as the sun begins to sink over the horizon, and Darcy is once again speechless at the fairy tale setting she’s managed to find herself in.

“After that I thought you might like to go shopping?” Loki continues, setting his belongings down off to the side of the living room. “I know of a few places that might match your taste…” 

Darcy’s only half listening as she pushes through another door in the suite. It opens up to the widest, softest looking white bed she’s ever seen, adorned in pillows trimmed in gold. Instantly, she feels the inklings of desire begin to burn in her chest, as if simply staring at the bed was enough to kick her hormones into overdrive. This weekend just got a lot more interesting. She stands in the doorframe, staring at the thing, as Loki reappears at her side.

“…and the shops are relatively close to another local gallery, which I think - ” Loki pauses as he stops at Darcy’s side in the doorway, looking between her and the bed. 

Darcy’s eyes snap up to meet his, and when he lands on her gaze, Darcy knows he can register the hunger in her eyes by the way it reflects in his own. 

“We’re not going out tonight, are we?” Loki asks, like he doesn’t sound the least bit sorry about it. 

“Nope,” Darcy breathes, pushing herself on him in one swift instant, their lips meeting in frenzied synchronization that seem to say that this was a long time coming. Darcy knows what she wants. And she’s going to get it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooooh boy, bring on the flack for ending the chapter like that! But I promise you'll really enjoy the way it picks up right where it leaves off in Chapter 15! ;) 
> 
> (the chapter title comes from the lyrics to _Wonderland_ by Taylor Swift. Listen to the song if you want any inkling of what's to come for these two. Or don't. Depending on your penchant for potential spoilers!)


	15. Trysts and Trepidations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, loves! Safe to say this chapter is _thoroughly_ NSFW. But it _is_ what you've all been waiting for, so without further adieu...

The kiss has the driving force behind it of a blazing sun, one that does not go unmatched by Loki. He lets out a groan of surprise mixed with pleasure, reaching around and grabbing her by the waist, his fingertips brushing up under her blouse and pressing into her tender skin. 

Darcy’s heart beats wildly in her chest. She reaches up, tangling her hands in his hair as his hands make quick work of her jeans, unbuttoning them and tugging them down her legs until she can wiggle free of them. As soon as the task is accomplished, Loki’s mouth is back on hers, biting and sucking and moaning and pulling. 

“I’m going to need to take that blouse off you now,” He growls against her lips, already letting his hands travel up her back to push up the fabric. 

“Mhm,” Is the only response she can elicit with her lips against his neck, softly kissing his skin. She pulls back so he can peel it off her body, leaving her standing in front of him in her bra and panties. Loki’s eyes rake over her figure as he takes in the sight of her exposed curves and beautifully pale skin that had become flushed in just the right places. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in the appropriate light before,” He breathes, “You are such an exquisite creature. To think how long I’ve let you go unnoticed…such wasted time.”

“Well,” Darcy raises a seductive eyebrow, “You’re noticing it now. No interruptions.” She saunters in closer, grabbing him by the fabric of his v-neck, “Just you and me. In this hotel room. All night.” 

Darcy watches as he reaches back and pulls his shirt over his head, throwing it to the ground before grasping her face passionately with both hands, sealing her lips with a wild kiss. He breaks it only to whisper hotly against her mouth, “Gods, I love it when you talk like that.” 

She moans into his mouth, the sound coming from somewhere deep inside and slipping out past her lips. Loving that she does this to him. Loving that she can give him that kind of reaction. It makes her feel powerful, bolder even. Her hands travel up his bare back, marveling in the way his smooth skin pulls taught over his lean muscles. 

Somehow, they find themselves moving towards the bed, tangled up in each other as they are. Loki gently pushes himself on top of her, both of them scooting back until there’s enough room for the two of them. Darcy likes this, likes the way he feels on top of her, both of them a mess of roaming hands and shallow, hot breaths. 

She arches her back into him, letting one of his hands slip underneath her and unclasp her bra, tossing it to the side along with the rest of their discarded clothes. She expects him to claim her breasts with a hot and heavy mouth, so when he lightly kisses the tops of each, she shudders underneath him. 

“You are wrought with desire, aren’t you, darling?” He mewls, his tongue circling her breasts, teasing her hardened nipples. She moans loudly when he sucks down onto one, letting his free hand slide down her waist and come to rest outside her soaked-through panties. 

He chuckles darkly against her skin, pushing her underwear off and sliding two fingers against her slick folds. He lets out a little “ah,” stroking against her hot sex as she writhes under him, “Oh yes, terribly wrought indeed. We’ll have to do something about that, won’t we?” 

Darcy’s mind starts to leak out of her ears at his touch. She can’t help but thrust against his hand as he curls his fingers inside her exactly where she needs it. He lazily pumps his fingers in and out a few more times, hitting her just right, threatening to make her fall to pieces, before retracting his fingers suddenly.

“Why’d you stop?” Darcy whines, looking up at him expectantly.

“Patience,” He growls, the sound vibrating across Darcy’s lips as he kisses her, letting his tongue swirl inside her mouth. It’s wet and hot and full of promise, and when he ruts his hips against hers, the promise is even more evident. 

Darcy reaches down with one hand, trailing down his chest until she comes to the restrained bulge in his pants. She unzips his jeans and he shrugs out of them, leaving only his briefs between them. 

Feeling embolden and left with wanting, she traces the outline of his evident hard on, her touch light and teasing. He’s big - that much she had expected - but it still sends a jolt through her stomach. Loki groans when she begins to palm him through the thin fabric, his already leaking cock twitching in anticipation.

“ _Fuck,_ ” He moans, and it turns Darcy on even more, “I don’t want to come like this.” He grasps her hand, halting her. When his eyes meet hers, they’re blazing, lustful, “I want to come deep inside you,” He pauses, rolling his hips against her as she gasps, “Want to feel you.” 

_Shit_. Darcy felt like coming just hearing him talk like that. Who talked like that? And who knew the instant effect it could have? He reaches down to his discarded jean pocket and pulls out a condom.

Darcy gives him a curious look, “You knew this was going to happen, didn’t you?”

Loki’s sly grin is enough to set her blood on fire, “Only hoped, darling.”

As soon as he puts the condom on, he rolls back on top of her, covering her mouth in a passionate, open-mouthed kiss, rocking his body gently against hers. The friction of his cock rubbing up against her sex but not yet penetrating begins to drive Darcy mad. She wraps her legs around his waist, canting her hips up, encouraging him to do it. To finally do what they’d been aching after for so long. To finally -

“ _Ah!_ ” Darcy cries out with a sharp breath, squeezing her legs tighter around him as his cock slides into her wet heat, penetrating her to her core. At the same time, Loki lets out a small moan, burying his head in the crook of her shoulder.

Darcy feels delirious, her thoughts clouded with a hazy lust as Loki slowly pulls out, not quite to the tip, before slamming back inside. Both of them moan with pleasure, and it’s not long before they build a rhythm, Loki grinding against her as she cants her hips up to match his thrusts. 

“You’re mine,” His words spill into her ear, hot and heavy as they instantly resonate deep within her core. “You - ” _thrust_ “ are - ” _thrust_ “mine.” _thrust_. 

“Yes,” Darcy mumbles out with incoherency, her head lolling in agreement as he pushes himself impossibly deeper inside her. “Yours…yours…yours.” 

She whimpers into his shoulder, biting down as she feels herself being brought closer and closer to the edge. The hot coil of lust that had formed deep within her belly was growing tighter and tighter, threatening to implode at any moment. 

“Loki, please, I’m - ” She begs, her breath hitching in her throat. 

“Shh, I know you’re almost there,” He whispers into her hear, coaxing her into letting go. He brings his hand down to rub against her clit, stroking against her most sensitive part as he thrusts into her in tandem. She screams out, her orgasm threatening to take over at any second. 

“Come for me, Darcy,” He commands softly in her ear, and the way his voice melts against her skin in combination with everything else is finally enough to send her toppling over the edge. 

“ _Loki!_ ” She comes with a broken sob, feeling wave after wave of pleasure crash through her body. She writhes under him, seeing spots in her field of vision, feeling like the world was ending in the absolute best way possible. And he comes at the sound of his own name parting from her lips, thrusting into her with a final shudder and low moan.

Darcy isn’t even fully cognizant of what happens after that. She can feel Loki pull out of her, hear the sound of him getting up and disposing of the condom across the room, crawling back into bed with her with a heavy sigh. She’s floating down from her high with closed eyes and heavy breathing as Loki curls up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and gently kissing her neck. It feels like bliss. Pure, thorough bliss. 

After that, all she remembers is falling asleep.

__________________________________

When Darcy wakes up, it’s sometime between late night and early morning, when the sun isn’t sure yet whether or not it wants to peak over the horizon. Loki’s still got one arm wrapped lazily across her stomach, his fingertips gently tickling her every time her stomach rises with a breath.

Feeling perfectly content and still tinged with sleepiness, she snuggles herself closer against him as a little spoon, loving the warmth of him pressed against her backside. She had hoped not to wake him, but she can feel him stirring behind her as he adjusts to their closer position. Rather, it's his sudden arousal that gives him away first. 

“Good morning,” He whispers, his voice low and cracking with sleep. His hand lazily slides up and down her stomach, just stopping short of reaching the undersides of her breasts. It prickles her skin with instant gooseflesh.

“Mmm, I’ll say.” Darcy quips, rolling over onto her back so she can look up at him. 

His hair was wildly untamable, more so than usual, and his green eyes lock onto hers from under heavy lids. When he smirks at her, the corners of his mouth crinkle in that way she loves, and she can’t help herself from reaching up and pulling him down into a kiss. 

After a few minutes of minutes of lazy kissing, Loki pulls back with an inquisitive look in his eyes, “What time is it?”

“I don’t know…early?” Darcy shrugs, trying to capture his lips again, “Why?”

“We don’t have to start getting ready for the show until noon…” Loki comments suggestively, wrapping one leg around her waist. He ruts gently against her upper thigh, making her aware of his growing arousal. 

Darcy laughs quietly as he showers the corners of her mouth in soft kisses, and she can feel his smile before she sees it, “Aww, are you saying we’re not going to get a chance to explore L.A. this morning, either?” 

“Unfortunately.” Loki quips sarcastically, and both of them let their quiet laughter mingle together as he kisses her again, pushing open her mouth, their tongues gently butting together. “I promise we’ll come back here soon so I can show you the city properly.”

“I’m sure you will…”

__________________________________

“Are you okay?”

Darcy looks over at Loki sitting across from her in the limo. He’d been shifting around in his seat for the entire ride, almost like a toddler would in an uncomfortable position. Picking at the cufflinks on his suit, tugging at his skinny tie, crossing and uncrossing his legs. All the fidgeting did not go unnoticed by Darcy. 

“No,” Loki responds just a little too sharply, untying his tie and attempting to put it back together again without the aid of a mirror. 

Their afternoon together had been glorious and carefree. After a few more trysts in bed (and then one more in the shower), the two of them had set off to go and talk to his publicist and Natasha, who would be walking the red carpet behind them. 

Loki had seemed relaxed and at ease all day, and Darcy had caught him more than once staring at her, always throwing her a private smile when she caught his eye. It managed to make her stomach flip and her heart flutter, knowing this man was reserving looks like that only for her. 

She’d only been apart from him for a few hours, when she’d gone to see his stylist. The stylist had brought a selection of dresses for her, and she’d decided on a strapless red dress, tight around her bodice and falling down in a flowing skirt. It accentuated all her assets in just the right ways, and after her hair and makeup were complete, she sought out Loki to show it off in front of him.

“Stunning,” He had breathed the compliment, looking at her in awe as she stood before him. She could feel her cheeks heat up, coyly biting on her bottom lip as she also admired him in his smart black tux.

“Not too bad yourself, handsome,” Had been her reply. He leaned in for a kiss, but she stopped him just short with one finger against his lips as she waggled her eyebrows playfully, “Ah, ah, ah. Lipstick. I’ll kiss you after the show.”

“Oh, I’ll make sure of that,” He had purred, kissing the corner of her mouth in a promising manner. 

Everything had been going spectacular until they got in the limo to take them to the event. It had been perfect. More than perfect. Like a fairytale dream she’d never imagined would come true. But the closer they got to the theater, the more anxious Loki became. 

Darcy sets her mouth into a sympathetic line now, watching Loki struggle with his red tie from across the limo. She gets up from her seat, bunches up her dress, and comes over to sit next to him. 

“Here,” She says softly, forcing him to turn towards her by grabbing both end of his tie. He lets out a defeated sigh as she expertly folds his tie into a simple knot. When she's done, she smooths it out under his three-piece suit, “Take a deep breath. Relax.”

“Believe me, I’m trying,” Loki winces with an edge to his voice, and Darcy knows it isn’t just pre-awards show jitters that are giving him anxiety. No, he was far too experienced at getting up in front of millions of people to let stage-fright affect him. 

“Thor?” She asks with a hint of knowingness, broaching the subject with caution. 

His only response is a quick eyebrow raise, as if to say, ‘what else.’ Turning to look out the window, Darcy can see him swallowing hard, his adam’s apple bobbing in his throat. He brings a hand up to his mouth, absent-mindedly biting down on his thumb’s cuticles in anxiety. And Darcy’s heart pangs for him.

“Hey,” Darcy says gently, reaching out and covering the hand on his knee with hers. He turns to look at her with a small, grateful smile, and she returns it, “You can do this.”

“You don’t understand…it’s been years since I’ve done something like this, since I’ve gone to such a public event…” Loki says tersely, “And now, to do it alongside my estranged brother…?” 

He lets out an overwhelmed breath, and Darcy rubs her thumb over the top of his hand, “I can’t imagine what that feels like. But I’m here for you. By your side, the whole night.”

Loki gives her a meaningful and curious look, some of tension easing from his face, “What did I do to deserve you, woman?” 

Darcy smiles slightly, and she can feel the limo roll to a slow stop. She reasons they must have finally arrived. Outside the window, she can hear the cacophony of voices, loud and excited, and now it’s her turn to feel the nerves to creep into her system.

“Follow my lead,” Loki whispers in her ear, and before she realizes it’s even happening, the limo door is being opened and she’s stepping out into a whirlwind of lights, cameras, voices, and general press frenzy. 

_“Loki! Loki! What have you been up to the last six years? Any new music?!”_

_“Loki, is it true The Odinsons are getting back together?!”_

_“Loki, who are you wearing tonight? And who’s the lovely lady on your arm?”_

_“Loki! Tell us why you and Thor broke up the band six years ago!”_

Darcy’s head is spinning, literally and figuratively as she looks all around her, and the only thing that keeps her moving is Loki’s hand on the small of her back, pushing her forward. The late-afternoon sun is setting in front of them, so all she sees is the silhouettes of reporters pushing their microphones and cameras in her face. 

_“What’s your name, hun?!”_

_“Who are you wearing?!”_

_“Is it true you’re Loki’s girlfriend?!”_

Darcy pauses, squinting into the bright lights, feeling her mouth turn to cotton as she stutters, “I…um…I’m…Darcy Lewis.”

A lame response to the magnitude of questions being thrown at her, she knows. But another reassuring hand is tapping her on the shoulder, and she’s grateful to see Natasha has appeared behind them.

“You don’t have to answer anything you don’t want to,” She whispers to Darcy, and Darcy smiles gratefully at her advice and her comforting presence. 

They make their way through the crowd of reporters, paparazzi and journalists, and Darcy can’t help but feel a little starstruck at the celebrities surrounding her. For the millionth time, she can’t believe where she is, and how she’s gotten here. At one point she accidentally bumps into Taylor Swift, and she’s pretty sure her jaw hits the floor. 

“I remember when you used to look at me like that…” Loki jokes once they’ve walked inside the theater, finally safe from the prying eyes of the press. There’s a sly grin on his face as he looks down at her. 

"I'm pretty sure that last time I looked at you like that was last night..." Darcy throws back coyly. 

"Touché," Loki chuckles before excusing himself to speak to his publicist across the room. He parts with a chaste kiss to her cheek, “I’ll be right back.” 

Darcy walks around the lobby of the theater, admiring the beautiful red and gold arched ceilings, making her feel like she was transported back into old Hollywood. And then her gaze lands on the minibar full of alcohol and appetizers being offered in the corner of the room. 

“I’ll take a martini,” Darcy tells the bartender as she saunters up to the counter, feeling cool and confident, “Shaken, not stirred.”

The bartender eyes her curiously at her horrible James Bond impersonation, but begins to make her drink nonetheless. That’s when Darcy feels someone slide up next to her.

“Darcy?”

A man with impeccably designed facial hair wearing a sharp suede suit looks over at her through his shades. And there was only one man Darcy knew that could make that style combination work.

“Uncle Tony…uh, hey!” 

She smiles nervously, grabbing the drink from the bartender and taking a long swig. _Well,_ this was about to get interesting. “What are you doing here?” She asks, trying to sound casual. 

“Funny, I was just about to ask you the same thing…” Tony eyes her curiously, taking off his shades and pocketing them as he leans against the bar counter. “I’m here because Stark Industries sponsors a few independent artists. Now, why are _you?_ ”

“I’m here…because, uh, because…I’m actually…” Darcy’s mind races, searching for an excuse. It’s not like he wouldn’t find out about Loki and her eventually. She was just hoping he’d read it over People Magazine’s Twitter first or something. She didn’t think she’d be breaking the news to him here and now. Natasha hadn’t prepped her for awkward family encounters…

Suddenly, a hand slips around her waist, and she looks up to see Loki standing next to her, shooting both her and Tony a calm and cool smile in greeting, “Stark. How are you? It’s been a while.”

Tony’s eyes instantly light up in exaggerated enlightenment, looking between the two of them as he connects the dots, “Oh… _oh_. My niece is dating Reindeer Games? This is too good. Does my sister know about this?”

“No…it’s, uh, it’s a new thing,” Darcy skirts around the subject, knowing for sure that her mom would be informed by Tony the second this conversation was over. “I’m sorry, back up - _Reindeer Games?_ ” 

She looks up to see Loki rolling his eyes, and Tony lets out a laugh, “It _must_ be a new thing if he hasn’t told you about the time he got blackout drunk at my Christmas party two years ago wearing nothing but a pair of antlers on his head.” 

Loki groans, running a free hand through his hair, “Really, Stark? Must you bring that up every time we meet?” 

“You’re just lucky I don’t bring the pictures,” Tony winks at Loki, slapping him on the arm. He then turns towards Darcy with an encouraging smile, “Keep him in line for me, kiddo." He leans in closer to whisper in her ear, "And P.S. - if this works out - I think it's only fair that I get all the credit at the wedding for bringing you two together.”

And just like that, he’s being whisked away by another one of his friends. Darcy breathes a sigh of relief mixed with the blush that had crept onto her cheeks at his parting comment. Typical Tony. Once again, she’s reminded why he's her favorite uncle. 

“I think I’d like to see those pictures, actually,” Darcy says suggestively as both she and Loki make their way towards their seats. A producer had come over the loudspeakers, announcing the countdown to showtime in just a few minutes. They hadn't run into or even seen Thor yet, so that was a good sign. Loki seemed to be settling into a more relaxed state. 

“Not if I find a way to burn them, first.” Loki growls, and for the first time that night, Darcy laughs heartily, slipping her arm through his as they sit down at their assigned table.

Unfortunately, and unbeknownst to her, it’ll be the only time she laughs like that for the rest of the night. Because the place-card on the seat directly next to Loki's reads none other than _Thor Odinson_.


	16. Brotherly Hate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey friends! I've got some big projects and finals coming up these next three weeks, so I don't expect to update here until I've devoted enough time to my studies (boo, schoolwork, I know). I hope you can all understand though! In the meantime, happy Thanksgiving (if you celebrate it) and happy almost end of the semester! 
> 
> Anyway, this chapter is pretty heavy, and it comes with some serious revelations. I'm excited we've finally reached this point though. Hope you enjoy.

“You’ve got to be fucking with me,” Loki curses quietly, his eyes glued to the name plate, “This is a joke right?”

Darcy can almost see the color draining out of his face, like someone had pulled the plug on a sink full of water. She grimaces as the lights dim, signaling the beginning of the show, “Maybe you can switch it really fast? Before he shows up? I haven’t seen him yet - ”

As if right on cue, Loki’s face turns to stone as he looks beyond her shoulder, and she knows that it’s too late. Thor is here. She turns around just in time to see him swaggering up to the tables, dressed in a smart navy tuxedo and his normally shaggy hair pulled back into a little bun. 

The show is starting and the crowd is cheering, someone on stage is giving a speech and the lights are bright and flashing, but all Darcy can focus on is Thor as he makes his way closer to them. She turns back to Loki, but he’s already occupied with a tall flute of champagne.

Darcy sinks a little in her seat as Thor walks around the tables, looking for his name card. When he spots it next to Loki, he looks down with surprise. 

“Loki.” Thor says, and Darcy can’t tell whether it’s in greeting, a question, or simply a statement of fact. He lets the surprise fade from his face and flashes a tight smile as he pulls out the chair, and Loki finishes off his champagne with one last gulp before setting it down.

“Thor.” Loki says back without making eye contact, and Darcy can here the strain in his voice. “I believe someone made the mistake of placing our seats next to each other, as I specifically requested against it.”

Thor looks at him with offense, “And you think I did?” 

“Well, it wouldn’t be the first time you’ve tried taking control of everything,” Loki responds with an eye roll as he pours himself more alcohol. 

On stage, a band has started playing some song - something that Darcy should have been one hundred percent enjoying - but right now all of her attention is focused on the palpable animosity seething between these two brothers. It’s like watching two cars about to wreck each other in the middle of the road. And it doesn’t help that Loki is guzzling champagne, either. 

“Oh, that’s rich. Do I look to be in a gaming mood tonight?” Thor asks darkly, “Don’t push me, Loki.” 

“Or _what?_ ” Loki spits back, venom lacing his voice, “What will happen if I push the mighty Thor too far, hm?”

“You already know the wrath I’m capable of; you’d do well to avoid it tonight, brother.” 

Darcy watches with wide eyes as Loki finishes off yet another glass of champagne. Thor is breathing heavily now, his jaw set into a hard line. He looks like he has the potential of punching Loki through the wall if there wasn’t a room full of people and TV cameras holding him back. In a span of mere minutes the two brothers have already spiraled into a full-on snark-fest.

It’s all worse than Darcy could have ever imagined. She’d witnessed sibling rivalry before at her friends’ houses growing up, or playing with her cousins. Petty stuff. But she’d never seen so much underlying anger and loathing between two brothers before. Whatever happened between these two is obviously something that cannot be easily put aside for one night. 

The show continues on, and Loki fidgets in his seat, trying his best to avoid looking at Thor. Different celebrities and show producers come up to their table between breaks, making small talk with each of them separately. When one producer tells them they have ten minutes before their award is announced, Loki nods his head curtly. 

“Are you fine with leaving afterwards?” He turns to Darcy with a terse whisper, his question sounding much more matter of fact than anything. Darcy shoots a glance at Thor, his arms crossed and glaring angrily up at the stage. 

“That’s fine,” She answers sympathetically, placing one hand on his knee. She can smell the alcohol on his breath, overwhelming her senses. He’s getting himself drunk in an attempt to ignore Thor, but if he doesn’t stop soon, it’s going to backfire completely. He continues to pour himself another drink, but she holds out her other hand to stop the bottle, “Hey, maybe you should go easy on the champagne. You’re accepting your award soon.”

Loki scoffs, and when he speaks, he begins to slur his words slightly, “I think I know when to stop, Miss Lewis. I don’t pay you to babysit me, I pay you to babysit my daughter.” 

Darcy winces as he takes another drink, feeling her heart constrict in her chest. _He’s just drunk. It’s only because he’s drunk. He doesn’t actually mean that,_ Darcy tries to reason with herself. Drinking makes people assholes. She’s been an asshole when she gets drunk too. But that still doesn’t make his biting comment hurt any less. Nor does it excuse it. Darcy grabs the bottle of champagne on the table and pours out the rest into her glass. 

“Hey,” Loki complains, frowning at her. “That…was mine.” 

“You’re drunk.” Darcy whispers back fiercely. Across the table, Thor is looking at her curiously.

“Babysitter…I _thought_ you looked familiar,” Thor says, pointing a finger at her.

Next to her, Loki sets his glass down and looks at her accusingly, speaking slowly, “You two know each other?”

Darcy’s cheeks flush, “I…I went to one of his shows once. The weekend you fired me. It was no big deal.”

“You never told me that.” Loki says, looking blindsided, and his voice is so devoid of emotion that it actually crushes her a little bit, “And you… _talked_ …to each other? You know my brother and you never mentioned it…”

“It was hardly anything, Loki; you’re blowing it way out of proportion,” Darcy tries to reason with him, but she can tell the alcohol is making him irrationally jealous. Her heart is pounding wildly in her chest, feeling like she’s losing her grip on him, “I didn’t even know he was playing that night, and I just wanted to see him after the show - ”

“Oh I’m _sure_ you did,” Loki fires back sarcastically, the look of disgust on his face a permanent fixture now as he turns to his brother. “Typical Thor, thinking he has a claim to all the women in my life. Nothing has changed.”

“Oh give me a break, Loki, would you just listen to yourself?” Thor throws his hands up in exasperation. “You’re pathetic. I was a fool to come here tonight hoping things might have changed. And for the record…she was never yours, and you damn well knew that.” 

Up on stage, someone is giving a speech about both Loki and Thor and their achievements, but neither of the brothers are paying any attention. Loki’s expression has switched to something colder at Thor’s words, like something has been triggered deep inside of him, and the look actually causes Darcy to shiver a bit. She knows that whoever Thor is talking about, it isn’t her. 

“She was still my friend,” Loki says, quietly, darkly, his eyes fixated on Thor. 

“And is that how you treat all your friends, Loki?” Thor growls back, and the lights in the theater dim as a screen onstage shows a montage of the _Odinson’s_ greatest moments. It’s quite the juxtaposition - watching the two brothers play together happily onscreen while in real life they tear into each other’s throats not more than twenty feet away from the screen.

“Don’t you _dare_ patronize me, Thor.” Loki seethes, actually baring his teeth, “You don’t know what I go through every day. I live with the constant reminder of what I’d done. You have no idea.”

“What _you_ go through?” Thor asks back incredulously. He slams his fists on the table, standing up to loom over Loki. By now, more than a few tables have stopped what they’re doing to look over at the brothers, “Have you ever though about what I go through? What I’ve lost? Of course you don’t, you selfish prick.”

Loki stands up to match his gaze, his chest heaving, and Darcy can swear she sees tears swimming in his eyes as he yells, “All I ever wanted was to be your equal. Do you think I wanted things to end up the way they did? Do you?!” 

On stage, the video ends, and the announcer returns to the microphone, “And now, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the newest members of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, the great _Odinson_ brothers duo, Loki and Thor.” 

Around them, the crowd rises to their feet, whooping and cheering wildly. The sound is almost deafening, and had Darcy been any farther away she would not have heard Thor’s icy cold response. 

“Then you shouldn’t have let her die.”

__________________________________

“Loki, wait!”

Darcy runs after him backstage after he storms away from the crowd, award in hand. He’d accepted the honor with Thor by his side, made some forced remarks about how grateful he was, slurred a few of his words (which caused the crowd to murmur), and then promptly turned on his heel and barged off the stage without ever looking at Thor (who exited on the opposite side of the stage). 

She finds him heading towards the back door of the theater, stumbling past security and personnel. A head full of red hair bobs next to him, and Darcy can tell it’s Natasha. 

“There’s a limo waiting out back,” She’s saying as Darcy catches up to them, “It’ll take you back to the hotel. I’ll work on damage control tonight, we’ll talk when you’re sober.” 

Her voice sounds stressed, and she shoots Darcy a tired, sympathetic smile before pressing one hand to her blue-tooth earpiece and walking away. When Darcy turns back to Loki, he’s pushing open a backstage door. 

“Wait up!” She cries, deciding to screw it and yank off her heels to catch up with his long and striding gait. He’s opening the door to the limo when she runs up to him, out of breath. 

“What the hell happened back there?” Darcy pants, angry and accusing. 

“Get in.”

“Not until you tell me what the fuck that was about,” Darcy levels with him, and she can feel her cheeks blazing. 

“In about five seconds a swarm of paparazzi is going to round that corner and hound me with the exact same question,” Loki explains, face still flushed with alcohol and outrage, “So I’d rather explain myself in the privacy of the limo to you, than to that pack of wolves.” 

That’s enough logic for Darcy to begrudgingly oblige, and she steps into the limo. Loki follows suit, and as soon as the driver takes off, sure enough, there are flashing lights flooding the end of the street. Loki groans, shoving his face into his hands and pushing up until his fingers run through his hair. 

“Loki...” Darcy begins, her voice shaking. This secrecy had gone on for far too long, and after what she just heard, she’s demanding the truth. She looks at him with scared, pleading eyes, “What did Thor mean…‘you let her die’? Let who die?”

Loki doesn’t immediately respond at first. He sets his lips into a pressed line, staring out the window. The neon lights of the city blocks flash by before slowing to a slow crawl, signifying they’re stuck in traffic. When he finally looks back at Darcy, his eyes are glistening.

“I’m so sorry.”

His voice cracks on the last word, and normally Darcy would have rushed to his side to console him. But now she sits nervously on the edge of her seat, feeling like she’s only just beginning to see the man in front of her. 

“About what?” Darcy asks cautiously, her eyes searching his, but he seems so far away, drowning in an awful memory. “What happened? Who did you let die?” 

“Her name…was Sif,” Loki says quietly, his voice sounding so small and afraid.

"What happened?" Darcy asks with a single breath, unable to help herself from pushing him further. 

“She was…my best friend,” Loki explains, and the far-away look in his eyes tells Darcy it’s been awhile since he’s talked about this with anyone. “She was Thor’s best friend. Our families were so close. We grew up together. We played together.” He pauses, pinching the bridge of his nose, “She was with us through…everything.” 

“How come I’ve never heard about her?” Darcy says quietly in response.

“Of course you wouldn’t have,” Loki half-laughs, and the sound is pitiful, “That was Sif - never a fan of the limelight. When Thor and I went on tour she would stay at home. She had her own job, her own life. But she was always there for us when we returned. She was supportive, fierce, loyal. And she was in love with Thor.” 

“And…were you in love with her?” Darcy asks, trying to place the pieces of the puzzle together. 

Loki sighs, and the sound is heavy as it hangs between them, “I don’t think I’ve ever been in love with anybody.” 

The admission is so sorrowful that when he says it, it makes Darcy’s heartstrings tug tight in her chest. She doesn’t make any move closer to him though, does not offer any physical consoling. Instead she waits patiently for him to continue his story. 

“She started dating Thor a few years after we got really big,” Loki explains, his eyes still glazed over, and Darcy can smell the alcohol on his breath and she knows he’s still drunk, “Nobody knew about it. They kept it so private and under wraps. I was jealous at first… _of course_ Thor would get the girl. I don’t think I realized I even liked Sif the way I did until I saw them together like that.”

“Around that time we began playing more and more shows. Expectations were higher. The pressure was…immense. And one thing became clear through all the chaos: everybody loved Thor.” Loki huffs, his voice laced with bitterness. “It was subtle at first, but as it became more and more apparent that the crowds were only chanting his name, he let it get to his head. He started to believe he was entitled to make decisions for us without consulting me first. Started to write songs alone. Started to act arrogant and superior to me.”

“Can you imagine? Finally believing you’re equal to the golden child, finally achieving the same recognition and appreciation as your brother…only to have the tables turn once again, just like they always do?” Loki asks, his voice rising higher with spite. Darcy flinches at the harshness of his tone. “I watched the fame get to his head, and I felt vindictive. I was moved by jealousy. I wanted him to know how it felt to be left behind for once. I wanted to hurt him like he’d hurt me. But I didn’t know how.”

Darcy feels like she’s holding her breath, waiting for him to continue. He’s livid now, eyes blazing with remembrance, and a part of it terrifies Darcy. 

“Sif came to me one night with doubts about her relationship with Thor,” Loki explains, “She wasn’t the only one feeling neglected by his newfound ego. We’d meet late at night, sometimes at a pub, sometimes at her apartment, and it was almost like therapy sessions for the two of us. She found solace in in our talks. I was there for her when he wasn’t. And then one night…she kissed me.” 

“I remember thinking to myself ‘What better way to get the best of both worlds than to not only have Sif, but to steal her away from Thor in the process?’ It would crush him. Sif wanted to forget Thor, and I wanted to destroy him.” There’s a hint of vindictiveness in his voice, but when he continues, it becomes softer, “So we slept together. Just once. I left for tour and when I returned ten months later, she had a baby in her arms.”

Darcy sucks in a quiet breath, but deep down, she had a feeling she’d known all along, “Fenix?”

Loki shakes his head, “A beautiful little girl with a tuft of black hair and my unmistakable green eyes. We didn’t plan for that. Not at all. But she was beautiful. It should have been perfect,” He stops to shake his head, “Except despite everything…Sif was still in love with Thor. I don’t think she ever really stopped.” 

“She came to me one night in hysterics. It was two a.m., and I woke to the sound of the most haphazard knocking on my door,” Loki explains, “When I opened it, she was standing there with Fenix in her arms, just sobbing uncontrollably while the baby slept peacefully. She told me that Thor knew. He knew as soon as he saw the child what had happened…”

“...and that pleased me more than it should have…” Loki shakes his head with disgust before continuing.

“…but she went on to explain that what happened between us was a _mistake_ ,” Loki recalls, still sounding offensive even now, “That she never meant for us to have any sort of romantic future together, let alone a child. She shoved Fenix into my arms, telling me to watch her while she went to Thor and begged for forgiveness.” 

“She was a wreck that night,” Loki says, his voice getting quiet now as he remembers exactly what happened, “Chest heaving with sporadic sobs, fidgety, hysterical. She was in no state to drive, and it was a miracle she had even made it to my house in one piece. I shouldn’t have let her go. But I felt like I had just been slapped in the face. I was insulted. Wounded. I had been handed my own child, and then told by her mother that I wasn’t good enough.” He pauses, looking straight at Darcy, “I should have taken her keys away. I should have forced her to stay until she calmed down. I should have done anything else but watch her leave.” 

“And that was the last time I ever saw her,” Loki says softly, hauntingly. “She flipped the car taking the curves on the coastal highway too fast. The paramedics said she was dead before the car even stopped rolling.” 

Darcy feels like she’s been hollowed out from the inside, vividly imagining what happened that night. She looks at Loki, blinking, trying to read his face. But everything looks distorted all the sudden, like no matter how hard she tries she doesn’t recognize him. How could he have kept this buried for so long? How could he not have told her? Told anyone? 

“Thor was devastated,” Loki says, “He couldn’t bare to look at me after that. And thus, the end of the _Odinsons_.” Loki pauses, leaning back into the seat as he considers something, “So I suppose, in the end, I got what I wanted. In a sick twist of fate, I’d hurt Thor more than I thought was imaginable…”

“…I just never thought it would be at that cost,” He finishes, breaking on the last word, and the pain is so fresh in Loki’s voice that she knows he had hurt himself just as badly as he’d hurt his brother. His plan, fueled by his desire for revenge, had backfired in the most nightmarish way possible. He'd lost his childhood friend...and the mother of his child. Darcy can’t even begin to wrap her mind around the kind of demons he’s dealt with. 

They sit in silence, letting Loki’s story hang between them, and Darcy’s head is pounding, still shocked by his revelation. She feels trapped, unsure of what to say, of what to do. The limo is still crawling through traffic, and she just wants more than anything to step outside and clear her head, to get away and breathe fresh air. 

“You can go to sleep,” Loki says, his voice flat as he stares out the window, “I’ll wake you when we get back to the hotel.” 

Darcy doesn’t think she can sleep, not after what’s just happened. But she doesn’t know what else to do. She crawls to the other side of the limo, facing opposite Loki, but he’s still not looking at her. She curls up in the seat, bringing her knees to her chest under her dress, and she watches him as she leans her head against the window. This strange man who has lived a life filled with so much pain. This strange man whom she thought she knew so well only yesterday. 

She falls asleep with the horrible, vivid imagery of a fiery car crash burned behind her eyelids.


	17. Daddy Issues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AFTER A THREE WEEK HIATUS, I HAVE RETURNED! Finals are just about over, but I found time to write and post this before the storm finally ends. And it's with this chapter that I've finally realized this story is coming close to being finished soon. Like, whoa. Have we really come this far? The love you guys have given this story is incredible...probably the best feedback out of everything I've written. Thanks so much for that, and please, keep it up! :)

When Darcy wakes up, she’s groggy and disoriented, and it’s with a great effort that she peels her face off of the sticky leather of the limousine seat. The engine isn’t running anymore, and she figures this is what must have jolted her awake. With a blurry vision she looks around her, and one thing becomes instantly apparent: Loki is no longer in the car. 

Shit. What had happened between her falling asleep and now? Did Loki get out of the car without waking her up? What time even was it? 

The door opens, and the chauffeur is graciously extending one hand to help her out of the limo. She heaves herself out of the seat, still in her dress and clutching her heels, and steps out into the still dark night.

And notices the driver has brought her home. To her parents’ home. In Santa Monica.

“Wait, hold up,” Darcy says, voice bordering on frantic, “Why did you take me back here? Where did Loki go?”

“Mister Laufeyson gave me orders to drive you straight back to your house, Miss Lewis,” The driver responds professionally, “He asked me to let him out while we were still in Los Angeles. That’s all I know.”

What the hell? Darcy feels like she’s being prodded in the gut with a wooden baseball bat. Repeatedly. Her head is throbbing and her mouth feels dry, and suddenly nothing feels like it makes sense anymore. She offers a half-hearted thank you to the driver before trudging her way inside the house. 

She can’t even think straight right now. All those things Loki had told her…everything about his dark past, the secrets he’s kept, the skeletons in his closet…how had he lived for so long keeping that bottled up inside? 

More than anything, Darcy just feels sorry for him. That look of utter brokenness on his face is seared into her brain. She’d just needed time to process everything he’d dumped on her. And she’d wanted to talk to him about it, wanted to offer him a shoulder to lean on, but he was gone before she’d even had the chance.

Maybe she can find a private moment with him Monday when she goes into work, she reasons. At least she’ll have all of tomorrow to prepare what she’s going to say. 

That’s when she realizes her car is still at his house, and it causes another round of headaches to beat their way through her brain. The night that couldn’t possibly get any worse seems determined to keep getting worse.

Her parents are either asleep or not home, and for that, Darcy is grateful. When she gets up into her room, she plugs her dead cellphone into the wall - only to find it light up with dozens of missed calls from Jane. Skipping the hassle of wading her way through each message, Darcy punches the call button on Jane’s contact. She picks up after the first ring.

“Darcy. Elizabeth. Lewis.” Jane reprimands loudly, skipping past the hellos. “What in the goddamn world have you been up to this past week? I just got on Twitter and - ” 

“Ouch, Jane. Voice levels. Bring them down.” Darcy replies, holding the phone away from her ear.

“Were you going to tell me you were Loki Laufeyson’s fucking _date_ to the Global Music Awards, or were you just going to wait for me to see it on every social media site on the planet?” Jane counters angrily, and because she’s cussing, Darcy knows she’s in deep shit. 

“I was going to tell you, I swear,” Darcy says sincerely, “But you were so busy at that science convention all week that I wanted to wait until I could do it in person. And then things just kind of…snowballed all of the sudden.”

“ _Pfft_ , I’ll say,” Jane says, sounding marginally calmer, “You owe me some serious girl talk.”

“I’ll make you a deal,” Darcy says, the wheels in her head turning a little faster now, “Right now I’m about to take a bottle of ZzzQuil and pass out for eternity. Come over and spend the night with me tomorrow night. I’ll tell you everything from start to finish, and then you can drop me off at work Monday morning because I left my car over there. Sound good?”

“ _Everything_. You tell me _everything_.”

“You got it, dude.”

__________________________________

It’s 2:30 a.m., Sunday night blurring into Monday morning, and Jane and Darcy are both cuddled in blankets, curled up on the patio couch swing in Darcy’s backyard. A breeze with just the slightest chill blows by them, signaling one of those outlier, premature, fall nights at the tail end of July. Darcy pulls the blanket tighter around her shoulders and looks over at her best friend.

“Holy shit,” Jane whispers after a beat of silence, the first words she’d spoken since Darcy had begun her story.

“Yep,” Darcy replies, mouth pressed into a hard line. 

“So, are you guys dating? Like, officially?” 

“ _That_ is the million dollar question,” Darcy says, sighing, “He’s weird about putting a label on it. But we just click. There’s so much between us, and it got to a point where we couldn’t ignore it anymore. And I thought things were going great until…until Thor.”

“Speaking of, that’s blowing up online right now,” Jane says, pulling out her cell and handing the screen to Darcy so she could see. Right at the top of the trending topics list on Twitter was “#SiblingSmackdown” and “#AwkwardOdinsonReunion.” 

“Those don’t even begin to cover the half of it,” Darcy groans, handing the phone back to Jane. “The weird part is, Loki was totally the aggravator. Thor was at least trying to play nice, but Loki just sat there and got drunk, pushing him until both of them just snapped. It was unbelievable. But then, after what he told me in the limo…”

“That’s insane,” Jane shakes her head, “Do you think…maybe…there’s a slight possibility he wanted Sif to die? I’m not saying he - ”

“No.” Darcy replies quickly, knowing in her heart that couldn’t be an option. “Jane, you should have seen him. He was a wreck. I think he might have actually loved that woman. At the very least, she was his best friend and the mother of his child. He just…let things spiral out of control. It was an accident. He was so young and careless and reckless…” 

“And you haven’t had a chance to talk to him about it yet?” Jane asks for clarification. 

“No…” Darcy responds with a wary look, “He just jumped ship in the middle of the ride back, I guess. The limo took me straight home. But I’m planning on talking to him tomorrow night after I put Fenix to bed. This sounds weird, but it’s almost like…like I don’t trust him to be alone right now. I’m worried about him. He just looked so…broken.” 

Jane scoots closer to Darcy, pulling her by the shoulder in for a side hug, “He’s a big boy. I’m sure he can handle himself without you for one night. It’s not your job to take care of him, you know. Especially if you’re not officially his girlfriend.”

Darcy doesn’t respond, feeling her gut twist at the thought of being away from Loki. He’d admitted how much better he felt when she was by his side, but he was so quick to cut and run without a word, shutting himself away from everyone when things got rough. If she was being honest with herself, it was a little infuriating. 

As if reading her mind, Jane offers her opinion, “I know I’ve said this before, but really, Darcy, be careful with him. It sounds like he’s got a lot of things he needs to work out by himself right now. And I don’t want you to end up with a broken heart.”

Darcy swallows Jane’s advice like medicine, but it doesn’t make her feel much better. She’d fallen for Loki fast, that much is easy to admit. But now it kind of felt like she was hitting the ground. 

A mellow silence falls between Jane and Darcy then, and Darcy thinks they’re both about to nod off when Jane comes back with one last question, “But the sex was good?” 

“Oh my _god_ …” Darcy moans at the memory.

Both girls fall into a light fit of giggles before finally passing out underneath the stars.

__________________________________

When Darcy wakes up the next morning, it’s from a gentle prodding sensation on her shoulder. She blinks open her eyes and glances up at her mother, standing above her. She’d fallen asleep sitting upright, head tilted back on the seat, and Jane was sleeping sprawled across her lap.

“Mom?” Darcy asks groggily, and Jane stirs awake beneath her.

“Darcy,” Her mother whispers harshly, frantically, “There’s a herd of people flashing cameras at our house on the sidewalk, and they’re all calling out your name.”

“What?” Darcy asks, snapping awake a little faster.

“The paparazzi, Darcy!” Her mother cries, and now both Jane and Darcy are bolting upright, “What on earth did you do?”

“Oh, _crap_ ,” Darcy curses under her breath, looking up at her mom, “I was, um, kind of a rockstar’s date to an awards show Saturday night.” 

“Really?” Her mom looks impressed for a second before a disapproving scowl falls back on her face. Sometimes Darcy wonders how her mother and Tony are ever related. Now is definitely one of those times. “Well, if they’re still here by the time I get home from work this afternoon, I’m calling the cops.”

Darcy looks over to Jane as her mom walks back inside. “Think we can sneak out?”

“I parked across the street,” Jane says, and Darcy can already see her mind calculating their escape plan, “I’ll go out first and drive around to the street behind your house. Think you can jump a few fences and meet me over there?”

“Doesn’t sound like we have any other option,” Darcy grunts, pushing herself off the patio swing and shaking out her messy hair, “Game on.”

__________________________________

As it turns out, panic is the theme of the day.

After they pull off a successful getaway and Jane drops Darcy off at the mansion (which is also crawling with camera rats), Darcy hasn’t taken more than two steps towards the door before Clint Barton is opening it. 

“Hey Darcy,” He greets her with a casual smile, “It’s good to see you. Come inside. The paparazzi have been hounding us all morning.”

“Yeah, I had a small fleet at my house, too,” Darcy says, stepping inside the house and looking at him curiously, “And it’s good to see you too. But where’s Natasha?” 

Clint tilts his chin towards her office, “Trying to track down Loki.” And then, as if a thought has just occurred to him, “Hey, you haven’t seen him, have you?”

Darcy stops cold in her tracks, “What do you mean? He didn’t come home yesterday?”

“Apparently not,” Clint says, scratching his chin, not looking more than mildly concerned. The man’s blood pressure levels are incredibly enviable. “Or else Nat wouldn’t be running around like a chicken with its head cut off. She doesn’t get like that often, so when she does, I know it’s bad.” 

As if on cue, Natasha comes storming out of her office with the force of a hurricane, her red curls bouncing furiously atop her shoulders. When she sees Darcy, her eyes light up with momentary relief, “Darcy. Tell me you know where Loki is.”

Darcy shakes her head, “No. I thought he’d be back home by this morning.”

“So did I,” Natasha murmurs. “Didn’t you leave with him Saturday night?”

Darcy shuffles her weight from one foot to the other, “Um, yes. But I fell asleep in traffic…and when I woke up, I was back at my parents’ house. The limo driver said Loki got out when we were still in L.A.” 

“Shit,” Natasha says the word in one agitated breath, “Did he tell you anything else in the limo?”

Darcy gulps nervously, “Um. He maybe kinda sorta might have told me about…” She shoots a cautious glance at Clint before looking at Natasha, “…Sif.”

“Oh, _fuck_ ,” Natasha says with a straight face and a far-off, calculating look, “This is worse than I thought.” She turns on her heel briskly and marches back into her office, leaving both Darcy and Clint standing in the hallway.

“So…'Sif' is bad, I take it?” Clint asks cautiously, folding his arms across his chest and looking at Darcy.

“Sif is bad.” Darcy says in confirmation, “Has Natasha really not told you about Loki’s past?”

Clint holds up his hands, shaking his head, “I don’t want to know. Dude’s business is the dude’s business. But it’s times like these that drive Natasha up the wall.”

Darcy chews on her bottom lip, raising her eyebrows in sympathy as Natasha exits her office, locking it with a key, and coming back towards the pair. Gone is the moments-ago frantic worry on her face, now replaced with a resolute and determined expression. 

“I’m going to find Loki,” Natasha explains to Darcy, “He’s pulled stunts like this before in the past. Not since Fenix was born, but still. It’s not new. The quicker I can find him, the better, because the press is practically knocking at our door. And the last thing we need is a story about how he ran away.”

She hands the keychain to Darcy, “You’re in charge around the house until I get back. You’ll be fine. Fenix is upstairs in her room sleeping right now. Call me if you need anything, and call me if he comes back here, alright?” 

Darcy’s head is spinning as she takes the master keys from Natasha, “Do you know where he went?” 

“Maybe,” Natasha says, already walking towards the garage door with Clint at her heels, “I’ll let you know anything when I figure it out.” 

Darcy stands in the middle of the foyer, grasping the keys until her knuckles turn white. Her breathing feels labored, like she might be sick. Why hadn’t he come home yesterday? Was it something she said? Or didn’t say? 

A flash of movement catches Darcy’s eye, and she can see Fenix move between the upstairs bannisters before running off down the hall. Darcy can feel her stomach drop down to the soles of her feet. She’d been eavesdropping. Great. 

She finds the little girl curled up in her bed, facing away from the door. “Fenix?” She calls out hesitantly. 

“Go away, I’m sleeping,” She replies, but Darcy can hear the wavering tone of her voice that indicates tears. And her heart breaks. 

Darcy comes over to sit on her bed, placing a comforting hand on Fenix’s shoulder and rubbing her back as she listens to her muffled crying. When she’s not sure how much more she can take, she lays down next to her and wraps her in a comforting hug. “It’ll be alright,” She whispers, stroking the girl’s hair. 

“Where did daddy go?” Fenix asks, hiccuping through her drying tears. “Is he coming back?” 

“Of course he is,” Darcy reassures her, “Your dad just had to go take care of some things by himself. Natasha’s going to bring him home right now.” 

“I heard Miss Natasha say he ran away,” Fenix says in the tinniest voice.

Darcy holds Fenix tighter, “Your dad would never run away from you. I promise.”

“O-okay,” Fenix hiccups again, breathing a deep sigh as the last of her tears dry, “My art show is this weekend. I just want him to be there.”

“He will be,” Darcy promises the little girl with a whisper. And while this seems to placate Fenix for now, Darcy herself is struggling to believe her own words.

__________________________________

Monday night comes and goes without a word. Tuesday creeps by, and Darcy catches herself staring at her phone approximately every six minutes throughout the day. Slowly, one by one, the paparazzi begin to leave the outside gate. When Wednesday rolls around, and Darcy still hasn’t heard from either Loki or Natasha, she feels like she might actually have a full-blown panic attack.

It doesn’t help that the house is completely desolate. It begins to feel empty, devoid of any life. There’s something not right about two people staying alone in a house the size of a small hotel. So she does what she normally does when things start to freak her out: she calls Jane.

They ultimately end up deciding it would be best for Jane to come over and spend the night. Darcy wasn’t the only one who needed help keeping her mind off of Loki - Fenix was beginning to start to worry again. And Darcy didn’t feel equipped to handle another meltdown like the one she had on Monday morning. 

Jane brings movies and popcorn over with her, hitting it off straight away with Fenix. The little girl falls asleep easy that night, and once she does, Darcy pours herself and Jane a glass of wine before they find a spot at the kitchen counter to sit and drink. 

“Have you checked your phone yet?” Jane asks, taking a sip.

“Only every minute for the last two hours,” Darcy sighs, shaking her head, “Who does that?” She asks, referring to Loki. 

“What, you mean run away from every responsibility in their life?” Jane scoffs, rolling her eyes.

“Yeah,” Darcy mumbles, “I thought maybe he just wanted to be alone on Saturday night. Wanted time to gather his thoughts. But this? This is too long. No child should have to hear their father ran away.”

“It’s immature and selfish,” Jane agrees, shaking her head. “I wonder if he thinks this is his way of punishing himself? Just taking himself out of everyone’s equation?” 

“But he doesn’t realize how much damage that does. Doesn’t he know how loved he is?” Darcy continues, feeling angrier with every word. She wishes he was here now, so she could see the look in his eyes as she tells him this, “By Fenix? Natasha? All his friends? Even…”

“Even you?” Jane finishes, and Darcy nods her head solemnly. 

It was true. She loved him. Was _in love_ with him. The realization turns her heart into an anchor, making her chest feel like an ocean. This is not what being in love should feel like. 

“Did you hear that?” Jane says suddenly, snapping Darcy out of her reverie. 

Just as Darcy is about to shake her head no, she does her the sound of a small thud coming from right outside the kitchen window. “It’s probably just an animal,” Darcy says without conviction. 

“No! Did you see that?” Jane says suddenly, standing up from her seat and pointing outside, “I swear I just saw something move. Something big. Darcy, I think it’s a person.”

The girls lock eyes, and Darcy knows Jane isn’t joking. She’s not the type to kid about this sort of thing anyway. Instantly, a fresh wave of panic flows through Darcy, and her adrenaline begins to pump. 

“Should we call the police?” Jane whispers frantically.

“No. Bad idea,” Darcy whispers back, moving towards the light switch and flicking it off. “Cop cars in front of Loki Laufeyson’s house right now? That would cause a media shitstorm.” 

“Sorry, but I value my life more than I do Loki's celebrity image.” Jane’s eyes practically bug out of her head, “What if it’s a robber? Or a murderer?” 

Darcy weighs her options for a split second. Part of her is secretly wondering, hoping, that maybe it’s Loki who is outside. But another part of her rationalizes that she’s in a celebrity’s mansion, alone, without the head of security to protect her. And the chances of a robber suddenly seem way more likely. 

That’s when she hears another thud.

“Go upstairs and lock yourself in Fenix’s room,” Darcy commands, “I’m going to see if I can get a better look outside.”

“Be careful,” Jane whispers, grabbing her cell phone, “And if you don’t call me in five minutes, I’m calling the police no matter what.”

“Fair enough,” Darcy reasons, and with that, the two girls split up.

Darcy shudders in the darkness, working up her courage as she tiptoes through the kitchen. What if the intruder has a weapon? Should she have something to defend herself with too, just in case? 

She rifles through the drawers in the kitchen. A knife? Too messy. A rolling pin? No…what if he or she has a gun? That wouldn’t do any good. 

Darcy’s mind lingers on the idea of a gun before she remembers the keys in her pocket. She dashes towards Natasha’s office, jamming the key in the lock and twisting open the door. There’s no way Natasha would keep a gun in her office. And there’s no way Darcy would feel comfortable using one. But maybe…just maybe…

 _Score_. Darcy finds a taser tucked neatly away in a side cabinet. She holds it up in front of her face, examining the trigger, feeling a rush of courage sweep through her. 

As stealthily as possible, she makes her way back into the kitchen, peering out into the backyard before quietly sliding open the glass door. Taser aimed eye-level in front of her, she takes slow steps into the darkness. 

“Hello?” She calls out, and instantly she regrets it. _Hello? Seriously? Did I seriously just call out to greet a potential murderer? Good one, Lewis._

She hears a noise almost directly behind her, and she whirls around, finger on the trigger of the taser. All she can see is the black, hulking, shadowy mass of a person emerging from the bushes, and that’s all it takes for her to point, aim, and shoot. 

She screeches as the gun delivers a electric jolt to the victim, who groans and collapses to the ground. _Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit._

Darcy runs over and flips on the porch lights, hoping to get a better look at the intruder. He’s lying there on the ground, rolling over and clutching his chest in pain as he groans and coughs. He’s big, muscular, with a mess of shaggy blonde hair tied back into a ponytail and… _oh_.

Behind her, Darcy can hear Jane sliding open the patio door and calling out, “Darcy, are you okay?! I saw the lights come on out here. What happened?”

Darcy stares down at the man lying on the ground, slowly blowing out a rush of air as she takes in the sight before her. 

“I’m pretty sure I just tasered Thor Odinson.”


	18. Push and Pull

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, beauties! If you follow me on tumblr, you'll know the reasons I've been away from this story for so long. University kicked my butt pretty much from the end of November until the end of December. I needed to take a time out and really focus on my personal life, finish my school work, as well as apply for graduate schools! I hope all of you can understand that. But I'm finally back in the swing of things! This is my final semester of college, and I'm ready to rock it. 
> 
> As for this fanfic, it truly has meant so much to me. It's such an escape to be able to write this story, and I love it with my whole heart. I'm excited to give it the ending it deserves. And I hope you're excited to read it! We're nearing the end soon. And your support has meant everything to me. 
> 
> But enough from me! Get on down there and enjoy this long-awaited next chapter. And let me know what you think!

When Thor lies down on the couch inside the lounge, he’s so large that his feet dangle off the side. Both Jane and Darcy had helped him inside, almost falling over themselves as they supported his weight on either side. Meanwhile, Thor just kept mumbling apologies through the pain as they hobbled indoors. 

Jane comes into the lounge with a glass of water while Darcy stands in front of the couch, biting the nail on her thumb neurotically. At least she’d been right not to call the police. If the press got a hold of this, it would have been way more scandalizing than a robber. 

Thor sits upright when Jane approaches, grunting ever so slightly in pain. She sits down next to him, and Darcy can see she’s still shaking a little from the adrenaline rush moments earlier. She offers the glass to Thor, accidentally spilling a little water over onto his hand.

“Shoot, I’m sorry,” Jane mumbles. 

“It’s only water,” Thor says understandingly, taking the glass and smiling over at her with an endearing grin that seems to stretch out his whole face. "I'm sorry, what was your name? I must have missed it."

"Um, Jane," She replies, "Jane Foster. I'm Darcy's friend."

"A pleasure to meet you, Jane," Thor replies, tipping up his water in a small toast near his mouth before taking a sip. 

Jane blushes - actually blushes - as she bites her bottom lip and looks down at her hands. Thor’s eyes linger a little longer on Jane’s face though, and Darcy’s not really sure what’s happening, but that doesn’t stop her from interrupting them. 

“So,” Darcy says, clearing her throat and breaking whatever junior high moment had just transpired between Jane and Thor. “I feel like this is an appropriate question to ask. Why _the hell_ were you sneaking around in the bushes outside?”

Thor sighs, running a hand through his hair, “I apologize. I did not mean to scare you like I did.”

“Well, mission not accomplished,” Darcy muses sarcastically, leaning against the arm rest of the opposite couch.

“I came here tonight to speak with my brother, actually.” Thor continues, “I should have just knocked…”

“...Like a normal person,” Darcy finishes with a little too much bite, earning a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it glare from Jane. 

“I deserve your anger, I know.” Thor says, sounding sincere, “I panicked when I arrived. I came to apologize. And I was hoping…well, I was hoping to see Fenix. To maybe catch a glimpse of her through a window, since I was certain once I knocked that my brother wouldn’t let me see her, let alone himself.”

Darcy stands there, biting her lip, “Fenix is asleep.”

“I gathered as much,” Thor raises his eyebrows as he takes a deep breath in defeat, “And what of my brother? Where is Loki?” He looks around the room, as if he’s expecting Loki to pop out from behind a curtain. 

Jane speaks up, “Wait, you don’t know?”

“Know what?” Thor asks, looking from Jane to Darcy. 

“Loki went AWOL,” Darcy cuts in, hardly keeping the edge and out of her voice, “The night of the award ceremony. Natasha went looking for him.”

“I was unaware of that,” Thor says while shaking his head, and then, under his breath, “This is all my fault.”

“Well, I can’t say what you did exactly _helped_ the situation,” Darcy sasses back with a scoff, feeling emboldened by her anger from earlier. 

“Darcy!” Jane admonishes her outburst.

“Well, it’s true!” Darcy throws a hand towards Thor as if to make her point clearer. She takes a deep breath and collects herself marginally, “Listen, I know you were trying to play nice Saturday night. I watched Loki become a drunk aggravator. But after a certain point you gave into it. You can’t deny the part you played in that shitfest.” 

“I do not deny it,” Thor replies, taking the verbal beating better than Darcy would’ve given him credit for. “Loki and I have battled our fair share of problems in the past. Some…worse than others.”

“Yeah, he told me,” Darcy says pointedly. She looks at Jane, “And I told her. So feel free to be candid.” 

Thor takes a second to register this, then blinks and continues, “Then you know. I haven’t seen my brother in six years. All because of what happened that night. We’d had our differences, but it was never anything we couldn’t work through together. After that, though…I couldn’t bring myself to speak to him. To even look at him.”

Both Jane and Darcy exchange a tentative glance, their silence prompting Thor to continue. 

“But…I’d be a fool to admit I don’t miss him. Don’t still…love him. Even after everything. We’d both made mistakes, and as much as I tried to deny it, I realized we both had a part to play in what happened. I had myself to blame for the actions that lead to Sif's death, as well. It took me a long time to realize this, through all of the pain and grieving. And while I'm far from forgiving myself, I thought that seeing Loki again might help me come to forgive him.” 

“I was hoping when we saw each other on Saturday night, he might have had a change of heart, as well. After all, it’d been so long,” Thor pauses to laugh, and the sound is regretfully bitter, “I was wrong about that as soon as I walked in the door and saw him.” 

Thor stands up from the couch, setting his glass of water down on the side table, “I’m sorry to have bothered you ladies this evening. Please, if you see my brother, let him know I’d like to speak with him.” 

Darcy takes in a deep breath. She’d underestimated Thor. He’d done some shitty things in the past, but he seemed sincere in stepping up to the plate to try and make things right again. It was more than she could say of Loki right now, anyway. 

Darcy’s about to reply when the squeak of a door snaps everyone’s attention to the front of the room. There, standing in the crack of the doorway, is a little girl with a pair of curious green eyes. 

“Who’s that?” Fenix asks, her tiny voice carrying out into the room. She’s addressing Darcy but her eyes are squarely locked on Thor. 

“Honey, go back to bed,” Darcy replies, cut off by a simultaneous “Fenix?” from Thor. 

Fenix ignores Darcy completely, stepping nervously into the room. She’s clutching one of her stuffed animals tight to her chest, and her hair is still ruffled from whatever sleep she’d gotten. 

“How do you know my name?” She asks Thor, staring up at him curiously. 

Thor stares down at her, a look of awe and heartbreak on his face. He looks at her like she’s a porcelain doll, so precious and unreal that even the slightest movement might cause a disruption. He steps forward, kneeling down in front of her.

“I’m…an old friend of your dad’s,” He says, his voice breaking a little as he smiles at her.

“Do you know where he went?” Fenix asks, a trace of longing in her voice. “I wish he’d come back.”

“I do, too,” Thor replies, and Darcy feels her heart tugging in her chest watching the two. An uncle and his niece, in need of a brother and a father. “We’ll find him soon, little one.”

Fenix smiles shyly at Thor, and Darcy can see she’s comforted at his words. That’s when she stifles a yawn, and Darcy takes it as her cue to intervene. 

“Alright, sweetie,” Darcy says softly, coming up behind Fenix and placing a hand on her shoulder as Thor straightens up again. “Time for you to get back to bed.” 

Fenix nods her head, but looks up at Thor one last time, “What’s your name?”

Thor pauses, unsure of whether or not to answer for a split-second, before giving in with a small smile, “Thor. It was nice to finally meet you, Fenix.”

“It was nice to meet you, too.” 

Darcy leads Fenix back upstairs and tucks her back under the covers. She stays for a few minutes, smoothing out the girl’s hair in a comforting motion until her eyelids droop all the way down. It’s not long before Fenix is back in dreamland. 

Darcy looks down at the little bundled girl below her, and a part of her wishes she’d never gotten herself into this situation in the first place. She’d never anticipated caring this much. About Loki or Fenix. Her heart felt like a messy jumble in her chest, and sudden tears prickle at her eyes. She wipes them away with her sleeve, sniffling slightly. Love sucked.

When she walks downstairs a few minutes later, she finds Jane and Thor standing at the front door, chatting quietly with their cell phones out. 

“Darcy,” Thor nods in greeting, “I was just exchanging my contact information with Jane. Just, erm, so you can, uh, reach me should Loki return.” Jane smiles slightly at this, holding up her phone as if to verify. Darcy is a little suspicious that it was more than just that, but now isn’t the time or place. 

“I hope to speak with you again soon,” Thor says, and Darcy can hear the sincerity in his voice, “You’re an admirable woman.”

“I’d have to be to put up with your brother for this long, huh?” Darcy jokes feebly, and it earns a quiet, hardy laugh from Thor. 

“Goodnight, Darcy,” Thor smiles at her, shaking her hand. He turns towards Jane, shaking her hand as well, but then takes it a step further as he brings her hand up to his lips for a chaste kiss, “Goodnight, Jane.”

He’s gone before Jane has time to react with anything other than a blush and a stammer. 

Once the door locks behind him, Darcy eyes Jane with teasing skepticism, “Damn, Foster. Move fast, much?”

Jane smacks her hard in the arm.

__________________________________

Loki returns the next night, right after Darcy finishes putting Fenix to bed. She hears the front door open around nine o’clock, and she practically sprints out of her room towards the balcony to see if it’s really him.

Sure enough, he comes swaggering inside, wearing a pair of shades despite the late hour. Natasha follows shortly after him, shutting the door behind him and looking like she was about one-hundred percent done with his shit. She catches Darcy’s eye and manages a small smile before veering off down the hallway towards her office. 

Loki makes his way up the stairs, not acknowledging Darcy in the slightest. She’s wondering if he’s even seen her until he takes off his shades and his eyes are locked on hers. They’re bloodshot and tired. He looks like hell. 

“Where were you?” She asks, her voice not sounding as strong as she’d hoped. 

“Hello to you, too,” He quips darkly, sarcastically, walking past her as he makes his way towards his bedroom. 

“Hey,” Darcy calls sharply, following him into the bedroom. She stands in the doorway, watching as he peels his shirt off in search for a cleaner one. “Talk to me.” 

“Later,” He responds impatiently, ruffling through his drawers as he picks out a black v-neck, “I’ve got to work on my music.” Darcy watches in disbelief as he throws on a new shirt before heading towards his studio doors. 

“Wait!” She cries, causing him to stop in his tracks and look back at her, “That’s it? That’s seriously it? You run away for almost a whole week, and that’s all I get? If Fenix was still awake I’d make you go in there and see her. We were worried sick.” Her voice cracks on the last word. “Let me help you.” 

He pauses with one hand on the doorframe to his studio, breaking eye contact to stare down at the floor for a few seconds. When he looks back up, his eyes are still cold, “Goodnight, Darcy.” 

The sound the door makes when he slams it shut causes her to flinch. What the fuck? She feels hollow, like she’d just interacted with a ghost. With a shell of a person. 

She makes her way back to her room, feeling like a zombie as she crawls under her covers. Sleep doesn’t come easy as she tosses and turns throughout the night. At one point, right after she’s finally managed to drift-off into some partial state of slumber, she’s jostled awake by a sudden pressure on the side of her bed. 

Rolling over, Darcy comes face to face with Loki. Suddenly, he’s accosting her mouth with his tongue, and it’s hot and passionate and everywhere, all-consuming and on fire. She stifles a squeak of surprise that turns into a moan as he runs his hand down her back and pulls her body taught against his own. 

Loki sighs hotly into her mouth, twisting his tongue around hers in kisses that are wet and open-mouthed. It feels good. It feels so good. But Darcy manages to keep a clear enough mind to know that this isn’t right. And then he rubs himself against her thigh, making his intentions clear. 

“Loki, wait, stop,” She breathes heavily, collecting herself between his kisses. 

“Hmm?” He murmurs, burying himself in her neck, kissing her soft skin there.

“Stop, please.” She says more forcefully, and it causes him to snap up and look at her. He pulls back, detangling himself from their embrace. 

“You don’t just get to…to come in here and fuck me like everything’s fine,” She spits out, shaking her head. He’s staring at her with those green eyes that make her weak, and she has to look away before she continues, “You don’t just get to run away from your life and come back pretending things can go back to normal. It doesn’t work that way.” 

He’s still not saying anything, the look on his face unreadable. So she continues, “Just talk to me. I’m here for you. I’ve always been here for you. But you can’t push me away and then pull me back. I can’t…” Her voice breaks as tears fill her eyes, “I can’t handle that. I love you too much.” 

Her breathing shallows, her body becoming fully aware at what she’d just admitted. There was no going back now. “I love you.” She repeats quietly, daring herself to look him in the eye. 

His lips are pressed into a thin line, like he’s wrestling with the words she’d just spoken. His eyes lock on hers, and for a split-second, Darcy is sure this is it. The moment he reciprocates the sentiment and opens himself up fully to her. But then his words from the limo days earlier echo in the back of her mind: _I don’t think I’ve ever been in love with anybody._

Loki calmly, slowly, extracts himself from her bed, leaving the room and gently shutting the door behind him. Darcy blinks once, unsure of what had just transpired. She feels like all the emotions she could have possibly felt have been wrung dry from her body.

So she rolls back over onto her side and chases after sleep once more. Anything to escape whatever had just happened.


	19. The Hardest Part

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, loves. I'd like to make a note of the level of angst I've brought this story to. I had anticipated it from the start, and it's definitely necessary for the payback at the end. I hope you can all understand why I've written this the way I have. Just know I don't like to leave my stories with unresolved angst. :) There are still a few chapters to come after this. 
> 
> More notes: the songs Darcy listens to in this chapter are _Born to Die_ by Lana Del Rey, _The Scientist_ by Coldplay, and _Hard to Find_ by the National. Very beautiful and sad and poignant songs, and they are 100% recommended by me.

The next morning, Darcy approaches Natasha’s office door with a knot in her stomach. She’d wanted more than anything to stay in bed, pull the covers up over her head, and sleep for the rest of her life. Anything but wake up and face the day. Because right now it seemed like the hardest thing in the world.

“Hey,” Natasha says, seeing her standing in the doorway before she has a chance to speak, “Come on in. Shut the door behind you.” 

Darcy does, walking in and leaning against Natasha’s desk next to where she sat. She doesn’t feel like making herself too comfortable. Really, she just wants to make Fenix breakfast and then go home to start her weekend away from this place.

“Sooo,” Darcy says, drawing out the word in a long breath, “You found him.”

“Clint and I nabbed him yesterday afternoon,” Natasha responds, clicking away on her computer before looking up at Darcy. Her expression changes from professionalism to something softer. Something more sympathetic. The face of a friend. 

“Where at?” Darcy asks, picking at the fringe on her shorts, balling the string into a little knot and ripping it off. 

“Up the coast,” Natasha says, “Near the place where Sif died. There’s a small motel off the highway. He was locked away in a room. He’s gone there before, when things were really bad. It’s been a long time, but I had a feeling.”

Darcy nods her head, biting her lip, “So he was alone?”

“From what I could tell,” Natasha shakes her head, “It was bad, though. The lights were off, the curtains were shut. He was just lying there in the dark, with a guitar and bottles of empty alcohol.” 

“Oh,” Darcy says with a sucked in breath. She looks up at Natasha, a concerned look on her face, “That bad, huh?”

“I haven’t seen him this bad in a long time,” Natasha says, “He’s been so good lately. To be honest, ever since he met you, it’s like he’s been a new person. There’s a light in his eyes again. But Saturday night…Saturday night was rough.” She pauses and says a little more quietly, “He doesn’t know how to handle his demons.”

“Maybe he needs to learn.” Darcy says bitingly, the words spilling out too quickly for her to stop it. She pauses, looking at Natasha with alarm, “I mean, he’s got a child! He can’t just be leaving when things get rough.”

Natasha nods her head, “No, I agree with you.” 

Darcy takes a deep breath and continues, steadying herself, “I love that I can make things better for him, like you said. But I can’t do that if he takes me for granted. I won't sit here and watch as our relationship switches on and off. I won't be his Sigyn.” 

Natasha sits there and nods her head, “I know, Darcy.” She pulls out a drawer and leafs through a few files before pulling one out, “I wasn’t going to bring this up before, because until recently, I didn’t think I had to. But here’s the renewal contract for being Fenix’s nanny.” She slides the file across the desk towards Darcy, who picks it up cautiously, leafing through the pages. 

“I know you only signed on until the end of the summer,” Natasha continues, “But I think we all assumed you were going to stay on full time afterwards. Especially after you and Loki got together.”

Darcy looks at Natasha, and for some odd reason, she can feel her eyes sting with the promise of tears. She blinks them back before they spill as Natasha continues, “I don’t know where you stand right now. And honestly, I don’t blame you. But you don’t have to commit one way or another this second. Just take the form home and think about it.”

Darcy swallows, and it feels a little painful in her throat, “But what will Loki do without a nanny for Fenix?”

Natasha’s eyes are so full of sympathy and steely resolve at the same time, that Darcy knows she herself wouldn’t have understood how that was possible only few months ago. But right now she understands it perfectly. 

“He’ll have to be a father.” 

Darcy walks out of the office with the contract, feeling like it's an anchor tethered to her arm, dragging her down with every step. Her mind is swimming with questions, all of them lost in a fog as she makes her way into the kitchen. 

Loki was with Fenix, cooking her breakfast and chatting animatedly with her. Something had obviously happened between the time Darcy entered Natasha’s office and now, because Loki was in the kitchen and seemed to have made amends with his daughter. _At least that makes one of us,_ Darcy thinks bitterly, sadly.

“Darcy!” Fenix squeals, waving a piece of her pancake around on her fork, “Look! Daddy’s back!”

Darcy forces a grin to stretch taught across her face, “I see that.”

“Now you can both come to my art show tomorrow!” Fenix exclaims delightedly. Darcy allows herself to glance at Loki, just to judge his reaction, but it’s unreadable. 

“I wouldn’t miss it for anything,” Darcy responds softly, and it’s the truth. 

Fenix stuffs the pancake into her mouth, chewing thoughtfully before speaking up again, “Can we invite Thor, too?”

Instantly, Loki’s head snaps up, his eyes darting from Fenix to Darcy, “What did you just say?”

“Thor,” Fenix repeats like it’s obvious, “The man who came to see you the other night, daddy, when you weren’t home. He’s nice. I like him.” 

Loki’s eyes are blazing, setting squarely on Darcy. Well, shit. She motions with one hand to have him follow her out into the hall, and he does so without any hesitation. Once they’re alone, she stutters, “So, uh, Thor might have come to the house two nights ago.”

“Why?” Loki asks impatiently, his teeth bared with the question. 

“He wanted to talk to you,” Darcy explains, “He wanted to apologize to you.”

“And you neglected to tell me this, because…?” He prompts, his voice sounding strained. Darcy feels cornered against the wall, but she takes a deep breath and looks up at him, making herself feel braver under his furious gaze. 

“Because you barely said two words to me last night when I tried to have a conversation with you,” Darcy spits back, “like a normal person. Excuse me if I didn’t exactly feel like talking after your ice cold shut-down.” 

Her fiery admission actually causes Loki to blink in surprise, taking a minuscule step back and allowing her to take one forward into his face to make her point even clearer, “Give Thor a call. If not for yourself, then for Fenix.”

“And why would I ever willingly indulge that monster of a man?” Loki asks, his voice wavering through his anger.

“Because he’s your brother.” Darcy replies with more sympathy, her voice hushed now. She looks at him with pleading eyes, “You think you’ve only lost Sif. But the reality is that you’ve lost Thor, too. Don’t take for granted the opportunity to get him back.” 

Loki is silenced by her words, and she hopes to god they’re resonating with him. She takes a step back, preparing to leave as she looks at him sadly, “Don’t be the monster I know you’re afraid of.”

__________________________________

That night, Darcy lays in her own bed at home, her iPod earbuds planted firmly inside her ears as the next song plays. She rolls over onto her side as the first notes of Lana Del Rey’s voice serenades her.

_I feel so alone on the Friday nights_  
 _Can you make it feel like home, if I tell you you’re mine?_  
 _It's like I told you honey_

_Don’t make me sad, don’t make me cry_  
 _Sometimes love is not enough and the road gets tough_  
 _I don’t know why._

Darcy groans, clicking the next arrow on her iPod and washing away the somber notes. Which, incidentally, are traded for ever sadder ones.

_Nobody said it was easy_  
 _It's such a shame for us to part_  
 _Nobody said it was easy_  
 _No one ever said it would be this hard_  
 _Oh, take me back to the start._

“Fuck you, Coldplay,” she mumbles, skipping this song as well. Her eyes fall to the folder holding her renewal contract, sitting on the desk next to her bed. The wheels in her brain start spinning as the next song begins playing.

_I'm not holding out for you_  
 _I'm still watching for the signs_  
 _If I tried you'd probably be_  
 _Hard to find._

She loved Fenix. The little girl that had wormed her way inside Darcy’s heart with her crooked smile and shining green eyes and creative mind and fiery spirit. She wonders when she had deluded herself into viewing her like a daughter, but acknowledges that it must have happened at some point.

And she loved Loki. That much she knew with burning clarity, despite it all. And she knew, somewhere deep down, that he loved her, too. But it was all wrong. 

He didn’t know how to love her back completely, because he didn’t know how to love himself. He needed to heal. Needed to reconcile with Thor. Because Darcy wasn’t someone that he could run away from when things got rough. She wasn’t going to sit by idly and wait for him to decide to love her again. 

Darcy’s heart feels like an anchor in her chest as she pushes herself out of bed and goes to sit at her desk. She glances down at the contract before grabbing a pen and a sheet of paper. She loses track of time as she chews on the top of her pen, every now and then scratching at the paper with bursts of clarity. When she finishes, she folds it neatly into four little creases and sits back in her chair. 

She feels tears prick at her eyes as she picks up her phone, trying not to dwell on what she was doing despite knowing it was the right thing. The hardest thing, but the right thing. 

She taps at the contact on the screen, holding the phone to her ear as tears spill out of her eyes. She takes a ragged breath, trying to compose herself before she speaks and wipes the tears away. It’s only a few rings before he picks up.

“Uncle Tony?” She asks, trying to keep her voice steady, “I have a favor to ask…”

__________________________________

The next morning, Darcy arrives at Fenix’s art show before Loki and Fenix. She stands in the back of the gallery, watching as parents and their children file in through the doors next to her. That’s when she sees a familiar face, and their gazes meet as she smiles warmly.

“Hey, Steve,” Darcy greets the strapping soldier. It’s been a few weeks since she’s last seen him, and a part of her wonders what it would have been like. If she had been attending this art show with Steve wrapped around her arm. What that life would have brought her. 

“Darcy!” He smiles kindly, bringing her in for a hug. The gesture is more comforting than she would have imagined it to be. 

“Margaret is in the show too?” Darcy asks, pulling back and looking up at him.

“She is.” Steve responds with pride, “And considering the mess of clay and paint she made out of our house the last few weeks, I’m expecting big things here.” He jokes sarcastically, causing Darcy to laugh. 

Steve was a nice guy. A life with him would have been comfortable. Safe. But predictable. 

“How have you been?” She asks, eyes searching his for the validation of her train of thought. 

“I’ve been good. Really good,” Steve says like he means it, “I just started seeing someone recently, too.”

Darcy’s mouth makes a little “o” before biting back down on her lips, “That’s great. I’m sure she’s great.”

“Actually, it’s a he,” Steve corrects her understandingly, a blush on his cheeks, “And, yeah, he is.” 

At that moment, a man with shaggy brown hair and rugged facial hair appears beside Steve, a stoic look on his face as he approaches the two of them. Steve gestures towards him, “Darcy, this is my boyfriend, Bucky.”

Bucky grins politely, extending a hand for Darcy to shake. And as she does so, she gets the cemented feeling in her chest that the ship with Steve has most definitely sailed, if it had even left the dock at all. 

“Nice to meet you,” Bucky says, his voice deep with a hint of a Brooklyn twang. 

“You too,” Darcy smiles at the two of them. And dammit if they didn’t make the most gorgeous couple she’d ever seen. “Enjoy the show.”

They walk past her, hand in hand as they enter the showcase. Darcy takes a ragged breath, adjusting her purse on her shoulder, before she’s almost tackled to the ground by a small force at her legs. 

“Whoa!” she exclaims, laughing a little as Fenix squeezes her tightly before letting go. She’s dressed in a picture-perfect lavender dress, her hair put together a little haphazardly in a pony-tail with a bow. She knows Loki must have played a part in helping her style it. 

“Are you excited to see my painting?” Fenix asks, bouncing up and down on her toes as she lets go of Darcy.

“I can’t wait!” Darcy grins down at her, “You’ve been working so hard on it.”

“I know!” Fenix says, and then Darcy can see her expression falter ever so slightly. When she speaks again, her voice is smaller and more nervous, “I just hope it’s good.”

Darcy takes the moment to kneel down at the girl’s side. There’s still no sign of Loki yet, and she reckons he must be parking the car. She tucks a few loose curls behind Fenix’s ears and looks her in the eyes as she whispers sincerely, “Whatever you do will be good, because you tried. And you can do anything you want in this world. Don’t ever forget that, peanut.”

Fenix smiles sweetly, a soft expression that threatens to break Darcy’s heart in two, “I love you, Darcy.”

“I love you, too, Fenix,” She admits, just as the little girl throws her arms around Darcy’s neck for a hug. She lets go as her teacher calls her up to prepare to reveal and present her piece. 

When Loki walks in the door moments later, it’s with a covert and subtle swagger, wearing his iconic leather jacket, even still as the summer was coming to a close. The lights are dimming in the studio, but he finds Darcy as he comes to stand next to her. 

“I need to talk to you,” He whispers in the dark. 

“Shh,” Darcy says, her heart thumping so loudly in her chest that her chide seemed ironic. She jerks her thumb towards Fenix, who was standing next to a covered canvas, “After.” 

Fenix reveals her painting to a polite clapping from the audience. On the canvas is a picture of father and daughter, Loki and Fenix, sitting at the beach and building a sandcastle. It was a memory from their beach trip. Darcy can't help her small smile at the sentiment. 

“Hi, my name is Fenix, and this is a painting I did of me and my daddy,” She explains sweetly, pointing at the picture, “This is my favorite thing we’ve ever done together. He helped me build a sandcastle at the beach, and it was the happiest day of my life.” The audience chuckles politely, but both Darcy and Loki stand watching in silence. “I love my daddy more than anything in the whole world.”

The audience claps once more as she smiles right at Loki, and then she hops off the stage as her friends surround her in conversation. Darcy can feel Loki shifting at her side, and then he’s grabbing her elbow as he leads her out into the hallway. 

Once they’re alone, he looks down at her, those green eyes sorrowful and pained. Darcy feels her breath hitch in her throat, wanting nothing more than to reach out and hug him. But she restrains herself. 

“You were right,” Loki explains, his voice coming out rushed, desperate, “About Fenix. She needs her father. That was…irresponsible of me.”

Darcy nods her head slowly, feeling her pulse quicken. He reaches for her shoulders, running his hands down her arms and grasping her hands, “And I need you.”

Darcy can feel the hot rush of tears swelling in her eyes again. It’s like he knows what she’s about to do. Knows about the decision that kept her tossing and turning in bed all night. When she swallows, her throat hurts. She can barely look at him when she croaks out, “You shouldn’t have to need someone like this.” 

He stares at her in confusion and desperation, “What are you saying?”

She retracts a hand from his grasp, reaching inside her purse and pulling out the folded letter. With tear-stained cheeks, she places it in his hand, folding his fingers on top of it. 

“I’m moving to New York,” She says, willing her voice to be stronger with every word. “I have a job with Stark Industries that starts on Monday.” 

Loki’s eyes search hers, his eyebrows scrunched up as he registers this blow, “What?”

“I love you, Loki,” She says, finally composing herself, though her heart felt like a sledgehammer with every beat. “So I have to leave.”

He’s still in shock, standing stiffly in front of her, almost as though he was refusing to believe what was happening. So she reaches up, allowing herself to wrap her arms around his shoulders as she buries her face in his neck. Breathing in that cool scent of leather. So familiar and comforting. God, she needs him, too. But not like this. 

“Read the letter,” She whispers close to his ear, squeezing the outside of his hand, and somehow she finds the strength to pull herself away from him. 

“Please don’t,” Loki pleads, his boyish voice broken as he looks down at her. 

“Goodbye, Loki,” Darcy whispers sadly, letting go of his grasp. 

She doesn’t let herself breakdown and cry until she’s safely in Jane’s car, waiting by the curb to pick her up and take her to the airport.


	20. Clean Break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It took me so long to write this chapter this week, only because the story is coming to a crescendo, and me (being the overemotional conductor that I am), just wants the song to go on forever. Alas, all good things come to an end. One or two more chapters after this. Don't look at me. I'm not crying you're crying. 
> 
> Anyway, kudos and comments and reviews are lovely and always so appreciated. You guys continue to be the best with all your love and support of me and this story and I am hashtag blessed because of it. Enjoy chapter 20!

Darcy stifles a yawn as she punches the elevator button, leaning against the back wall as it makes its ascent to the 38th floor. Today was supposed to be her day off, but she’d gotten a call from Erin a half-hour ago asking her to come sign off on some documents. And as project manager, she couldn’t really say no even if she wanted to. It was a damn good thing she liked her job.

The lights in the office are off when the doors swing open, which is odd considering it’s only 2:30 pm on a Wednesday. She steps into the office warily, the click of her heels echoing through the vast and empty space. That’s when Erin pokes her head out of the conference room down the hall.

“Hey Miss Lewis, I’ve got the forms in here!” She waves her down. Darcy smiles back at her intern in response. Erin was a good kid, about to start her junior year of college. In a lot of ways, she reminds Darcy of Jane: smart, determined, career-oriented. Which in turn reminds Darcy that she owes Jane a Skype session soon.

As she rounds the corner into the doorway of the conference room, she’s confused as to why the lights are off in there also. But it only lasts a split second before a switch is flipped and all her coworkers jump out and yell “SURPRISE!”

Darcy jolts backward a little, hand clutching the doorway as she gasps, “What the hell?!” She laughs a little, looking around the room at everyone, “Um, you guys do know my birthday was last month, right?” 

“Yeah, we know,” Erin says, shrugging with a smile, “But it’s your one year anniversary with the company! And we figured if we’re making you come in to sign off on some forms we might as well make it worth your while. Joe bought a cake. Really, Joe will find an excuse to buy a cake for anything.”

A slightly offended “Hey!" is heard from the back of the room, and everyone laughs. Darcy smiles at her peers, looking across the oval shaped table to see that there is indeed a cake with chocolate frosting. Her favorite.

“Thanks guys, that’s really sweet of you,” Darcy grins, adjusting the glasses on the crook of her nose. 

People begin dispersing after that, flicking back on the lights to the rest of the office, cutting cake and chatting. Darcy takes the forms from Erin and signs off on a few. She’d been heading her own project in Stark’s marketing department since the end of May and it was finally coming to a close.

“You coming out to celebrate with us this weekend?” One of her interns named Ian asked, pausing to touch her on the shoulder. “We’re hitting up a few bars downtown around nine on Friday night.”

“Definitely,” Darcy looks up, smiling at him as she sets down her pen. She’d made friends fast here. She’d also proven her worth to the department early on, climbing up the ranks to reach the project manager position in under a year - a record time for her department. It made her feel accomplished. Like she had done something worthwhile. And she was proud of herself. A feeling she hadn’t felt in a long time.

“Darcy?” A voice asks from behind her. She turns around to see her boss, Jen, standing in the doorway, “Can I see you in my office for a second?”

Jen’s office offers a stunning view of the city below them, all bustling with the activity of tourists and taxi cabs. Much more than Darcy can say of the view from her cubicle, at least. She sits down in the leather chair across from Jen and smooths her purple pleated skirt out.

“What’s up, boss?” Darcy asks, loving how the casual work environment has allowed her to get away with such informal greetings. The barely audible thump of music coming from Jen’s computer provides a nice background ambience to their conversation. 

“I wanted to extend my congratulations for finishing up your first project as a PM.” Jen says, sitting down behind her desk and waking up her computer before turning towards Darcy, “You really showed your strengths. I’m impressed by your ability to control the situation and guide people in the right direction.”

“Thanks,” Darcy says with a humble half-laugh, “I didn’t think I did half-bad, either.”

Jen laughs, turning her attention back towards her computer, typing in a few things before flipping the screen towards Darcy, “I’ll cut to the chase then. We have a branch in Tokyo, as you know. They’re working on a project similar to the one you just heralded, and I’m offering you the opportunity to be on the team over there.” 

Darcy’s eyes grow wide, looking between the job description on Jen’s computer screen and Jen herself, “Really?”

“Really,” Jen smiles, “It’s a big promotion. Comes with a major pay raise, too. You’ve done stellar work here at Stark Industries. You could go far.”

“ _Literally,_ ” Darcy raises her eyebrows, and Jen laughs. “How long would I be there for?”

“Just about eighteen months,” Jen says, “You’d fly out there in January, after the holidays. But we’ll provide your housing and pay for expenses. What do you say Darcy?” 

“Wow…that’s…I’m… _wow_ ,” Darcy stammers, flustered at the abruptness of it all. A year and a half living and working in Tokyo. It’s the opportunity of a lifetime, working for a company she’s already accomplished so much for. She should be saying yes. She should have said yes as soon as Jen opened her mouth. Why isn’t she saying yes?

“Can I have a few weeks to think about it?” Darcy asks, grimacing, “I appreciate this, I really do. But it’s…a big decision for me. I’m sorry, I just need, like, two weeks, if that’s alright.” 

Jen looks a little surprised, but nods nonetheless, “Of course. I'll expect your answer two weeks from today, though. I need to let our International branch know as soon as possible.”

“Totally,” Darcy breathes, standing up and shaking Jen’s hand, “Thank you again so much for this.”

“You’ve really grown since you got here,” Jen says, “I’ve seen you go from someone barely sure of herself to someone capable of moving mountains. You have yourself to thank.”

Darcy smiles, “Well, this place was the perfect environment for it.” She pauses on her way out the door to add one last after-thought, “It was just what I needed.”

__________________________________

Wednesday night after her meeting with Jen, Darcy comes home from work to find a stack of mail waiting for her. She has a notoriously bad habit of letting her mail pile up, and she designates a day at the end of the month for ceremoniously tearing through every envelope at once. Call it procrastination at its finest, but she never receives anything but bills or junk anyway. She takes a peak towards the bottom and notices an piece marked all the way back to June 30th. An entire month and two days ago. Yeesh.

She enters her cozy one bedroom apartment, makes herself a pot of coffee, and flips through the stack as the coffee machine gurgles and grinds behind her. 

“Bills…bills…bills…” She mumbles under her breath. Living alone was expensive. Living alone in New York City was another animal entirely. Maybe she should take up Jen’s offer after all. She mentally adds it to the "pros" side of her pros and cons list she's started in her head. 

Almost everything is junk mail or bills until she reaches the end of the stack, where a small, cream colored envelope is waiting for her, postmarked back towards the end of June. Her name is written in a beautiful ink script on the front, and the return address is one she doesn’t recognize. Curious, she rips open the back and pulls out a sheet of nice paper.

_Darcy Lewis_

You’ve been cordially invited to the wedding of

_Clint Barton & Natasha Romanoff_

on August 7th, 2015 in Santa Barbara

Please RSVP regrets only

Venue details are provided below

Darcy blinks in surprise. The wedding was set for _next weekend_. She swallows, turning over the envelope and finding a hand-written note on the back.

_Darcy,_

_I’d love for you to come to the wedding, but I understand if it might be difficult for you._

_Please know that I still hold you in regards as a very good friend, and always will, no matter what decision you make._

_All the best,_

_Nat._

Darcy reads the note once more, letting her eyes glaze over as she stares down at the counter. She hadn’t talked to Natasha in at least a few months, just some formal “Hey, how are you” chatter. But she had no idea that Natasha and Clint were engaged, let alone getting married in a week. Holy shit.

Instantly, her hand reaches for her cell, and she’s calling Jane without a second thought.

“Hello?” Jane answers after a few rings. 

“Hey. So, Natasha and Clint are getting married,” Darcy blurts out, deciding not to beat around the bush with formalities and jump straight into conversation, “Next week. And I’m invited to the wedding.”

“Kinda last minute notice, don’t you think?” Jane asks, sounding skeptical.

“Um, no, I’m just the world’s worst procrastinator and didn’t open the invitation until now.” Darcy says, jamming the phone between her shoulder and her ear as she grabs a mug out of the cupboard. “Do you think I should go?”

Jane blows out a noisy huff, mingling with the static in Darcy’s ear, “That’s a loaded question.” 

Darcy opens the fridge, pouring a bit of creamer in her mug before kicking the door shut with her heel, “Well, he’ll obviously be there.”

“Obviously.”

“So if I don’t go, it makes me look immature and cowardly, but if I do go, things have the potential to get very awkward very quickly.”

“Valid points.”

Darcy sighs into the phone, pouring herself a hot cup of coffee when she hears a man call out from Jane’s end of the phone, “Do what your heart tells you, Darcy!”

“Thor?” Darcy scrunches up her face in recognition of the voice, “Jane, do you have me on speakerphone?”

“Guilty,” Jane admits, and Darcy groans, laughing a little as she takes a sip of coffee. 

“Actually, good, I could use his advice.” Darcy muses, stepping down her mug, “Might as well take this to FaceTime if the gang’s all here.” 

She switches over to the video call, leaning with both elbows propped on the kitchen counter as she holds the phone out in front of her face. When Jane picks up a few seconds later, her face fills the screen, smiling at Darcy. Across her shoulder and behind the couch she’s sitting on is Thor, and he leans into the frame, waving at Darcy, “Hello, Darcy.”

“Sup, big guy?” Darcy grins at him in greeting. Jane and Thor started dating last winter, their fateful first meeting being the night Thor broke into Loki’s house. 

And Darcy loved that they were a couple. She’d been wary at first, and Jane had been nervous to tell her she was dating the brother of the man Darcy had walked out on. But Thor was so good for Jane, based on everything Jane had told her. He was a standup guy, always putting Jane first. And he was head over heels in love with her. 

“So, what do you think, Thor?” Darcy asks, blowing a strand of hair out of her face, “To go, or not to go?” 

Thor twists his face into a thoughtful expression, “I know you have not spoken to my brother in over a year...but I have. Did Jane tell you that we’ve started meeting for coffee on Sunday mornings?” Thor asks, and Darcy nods her head. It was true, and Darcy had been initially shocked to learn that last spring, the brothers had begun speaking to one another again. It wasn’t anything monumental, but for those two, it was a big deal. 

“Well…he’s…different now.” Thor continues, pursing his lips as he chooses his words carefully, “He was in rough shape when you left at the end of last summer, truly. But after he made that phone call asking me to meet him for coffee, things began to change. Not just between us, but in himself. I see a light in his eyes again. I’d missed my brother. We needed one another.” He pauses before adding a second thought, “He even let me come over and visit Fenix last week.” 

A small smile falls on Darcy’s lips. This was the first time she’d heard Thor talk about his brother so candidly since they began their reconciliation. It was…nice. Like a feeling that resonated deep in her heart and glowed throughout her entire body from the inside out. Something familiar and warm when she thought about that family. 

“That’s…amazing, Thor. That really is,” Darcy replies softly. 

“I’m not saying he’s fully recovered from his past demons.” Thor continues, “But he’s made the steps towards putting it behind him. He wants to change. To be different. And I believe he will get there.” 

“So know that if you do attend Natasha’s wedding, you will more than likely see Loki,” Thor continues, “And he won’t be a new man. But he won’t be the same man you once knew, either.” 

“And that’s a good thing?” Darcy asks.

“I believe so,” Thor replies with confidence, “But it’s up to you to decide that for yourself.”

__________________________________

The summer air is thick and muggy, bearing down on Darcy like a blanket when she steps out of her apartment on Friday evening. She’s dressed in high-waisted denim shorts and her favorite crop top, and even then she’s still sweating like a sinner in church as she begins her walk through the city.

She loves New York. Much more than she thought she would upon moving here a year ago. She remembers the day vividly, boarding the plane from Los Angeles with dried tears staining her cheeks. The way the stewardess kept asking if everything was alright. Granted, she’d been asking every passenger that question, but Darcy felt like she was extra worried about her. 

And she’d started her new job. Her new life. Her first taste in the workforce with an actual career. The thing she should have set out to do as soon as she’d graduated college. Before becoming sidetracked and swept up in Loki Laufeyson’s life. 

This time last year, she’d regretted it. Regretted ever getting tangled up in such a toxic situation, for ever letting herself getting too close to a man who wasn’t able to love her back. But then the summer turned to fall, and the fall to winter, and the winter to spring. And here she was one summer later, and the pain of it all seemed lessened somehow. 

Time had taken her wounds and healed them. Had reinforced the idea that she had made the right decision after all. She didn’t regret it like she had in the heat of the moment, when every emotion felt so raw and consuming and overpowering. Now she looks upon that time of her life and applauds herself for taking care of herself when he was not able to. 

He's never talked to her since, and she's never called him, either. There were so many nights she’d sat in bed, staring at his contact on the screen of her phone, itching to punch the little call button to see what would happen. But she never did. And eventually the urge subsided.

She misses him. She’d be a flat-out liar if she deluded herself into thinking she didn’t. But that was okay, she reasoned. Normal. Because she doesn’t miss him as much as she once did. And through everything - all the tears, the laughter, the chaos and growing up - she somehow found herself. Her own voice. And to Darcy, this meant the world.

It’s a little past nine when she enters the bar, filled with coworkers who are delighted to see her. Rounds of drinks are ordered, and libations are had. It’s not long before just about everyone is feeling good. 

“Oh my god, I _love_ this song!” One of the girls jumps up at one point, pointing in a nebulous direction towards the sound of the music in the crowded bar. Her and her friend begin giddily dancing to it in their drunken state, and that’s when Darcy takes note of what’s playing.

It’s a classic Odinson song. 

“I heard they’re getting back together, you know,” Someone from across the table shouts, “Thor and Loki. Someone snapped a picture of them leaving a Starbucks last week.” 

“No way,” Another girl responds, “Photoshopped, for sure.”

Darcy laughs to herself quietly, wrapping her hands around her beer bottle as she stares down into the hole. She’s tipsy and feeling light, wonderfully wrapped up in her own secret world. 

“What, you think it’s possible?” Her intern Ian asks, sitting next to her as he leans in with a cocked eyebrow. 

Darcy takes a swig of her beer before coyly answering, “Anything’s possible.” 

They laugh and drink and dance, and then drink some more. Hopping from each bar to the next as the city life buzzes around them, full of warmth and welcoming and excitement and plenty of alcohol. Darcy makes out with Ian at one bar, and then two other guys at a club later on in the night. She loses track of what she has to drink, and how many, but she knows she’s having a good time.

When she gets back home around midnight, she sighs to herself. The good kind of sigh. Where you feel like you’re finally at a state in your life where everything is okay, and nothing can hurt you anymore, not even if you gave it the chance to. 

That’s why she grabs her cell phone and a bottle of water and heads towards her patio door, sliding it open and stepping into the dark blue New York night. The alcohol has worn off, leaving her with a content and warm buzz. She leans against the railing, searching for the right number before she finds it and presses the call button. 

The city lights twinkle above, below, and all around her as the phone rings in her ear. New York has taught her how to be brave, how to love herself. This city has been good to her. But there’s a time and a place for everything. 

She takes a deep breath as the other line picks up.

“Yeah, hi…I was wondering if you could tell me if there are any flights available to Santa Barbara this Friday? Yes, I’ll hold.”


	21. Open Minds, Open Hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One. More. Chapter. After. This.
> 
> Enjoy, my loves.

“This one?”

“No.”

“This one?”

“…That one needs to be set on fire.”

“Okay…this one?”

“Meh.”

Jane holds up the dress to take another look at it - a gorgeous dark purple number with a sweetheart neckline and flowing knee-length skirt. She scrunches up her face at Darcy, “I’m pretty sure ‘meh’ has been the best response to a dress I’ve gotten out of you all night. That's just sad.” 

Darcy barks out a laugh, shrugging her shoulders like she can’t deny it. She’s sitting in a velvet chair in the dressing rooms of the third swankiest store they’d visited in Santa Monica that Friday evening, but her mind feels so much farther away than that. 

“Okay, I know how much you love shopping,” Jane says, tossing the last dress over the side of one of the chairs as she stands in front of Darcy, “So what gives? Are you that nervous about the wedding tomorrow?” 

“I don’t know if I’d call it nervous…” Darcy muses with a tilt of her head, “I guess I just can’t stop thinking about how it’s been a whole year since I’ve seen him. What if he doesn’t want to talk to me at all? Or what if I don’t want to talk to him? We could just end up blatantly ignoring each other all together, and we’d both be aware of it. Or what if he does want to talk to me but it’s too weird and polite and stiff? And then I make an awful joke and ruin everything? I could start to back out of the conversation and trip over a loose floorboard and fall into the cake as they wheel it out and - ”

“Darcy, stop.” Jane throws out a hand, calming her friend down. “A loose floorboard?”

Darcy lets out an exaggerated breath, “Yeah, I’m nervous.” 

She’d felt fine - more than fine, really - the week leading up to her departure from the Big Apple. Exuding confidence and control, ready to tackle whatever the world had in store. But as soon as she boarded that plane for LAX, her stomach began doing tiny little flips. _What if he has a girlfriend? He could have easily moved on. Hell, I moved on. I think. No, I definitely moved on. But, still…what if he doesn’t want anything to do with me? Do I even want anything to do with him?_

And so her mind continued to wrestle with her overpowering nerves the entire way there, and the battle still silently raged on as she shopped for a new dress to wear, and it was not going unnoticed by Jane. 

“Alright, this is the only time I’m going to be able to see you this weekend, and it is not going to be spent moping around in a dressing room, ” Jane exhales with surrender, extending her hands for Darcy to take. She pulls up her friend from the chair with a heave, wrapping her arm through hers and walking out of the dressing room. “Screw the dress shopping. We’re getting ice cream.” 

“What am I going to wear, though?!”

“The strapless emerald party dress I save for special occasions in the back of my closet.” 

“I appreciate the gesture, but my tits are going to pop out of that dress, you know that, right?”

“That’s the whole point.”

An hour and two scoops of rocky road later, and Darcy has managed to shake most of her nerves. Jane has always had a way of mellowing her out, even though Jane might be quick to say the same about Darcy. Sometimes all it takes is a look, and Darcy begins to calm down. She thinks that every girl deserves a best friend in her life that can wield that kind of power. 

Darcy munches on the bottom of her sugar cone, licking up the residue drops of chocolate that had melted over onto her fingers. She shoots Jane a glance as they walk along a trail surrounding a lake, the sunset burning orange across the surface of the water. 

“Did you know you’re the love of my life?” Darcy says matter-of-factly. 

“Darcy!” Jane responds with a hint of scandal, laughing under her breath. 

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell Thor. We can share you,” Darcy continues jokingly, enjoying the incredulous look on Jane’s face. 

“Gee, thanks,” Jane replies softly with a bit of sarcasm, and both girls giggle. 

“How is the big man, anyway?” Darcy asks, popping the last bit of ice cream cone into her mouth and chewing on it. 

“He’s good,” Jane replies, her face turning a very sudden shade of pink. Darcy grins at her as she continues, “We’re still kind of taking it slow, you know? But last week he surprised me with an overnight stargazing date.” She pauses before admitting humbly, “We sat on top of his car, just the two of us in the countryside, and he pointed out a star that he officially named after me. Brought the documents and all to prove it.” 

“Oh, my god,” Darcy looks over with a look of disbelief, followed by a low whistle, “Now every time I call you a star it takes on a whole new meaning. Did you just melt into a puddle?”

“There may or may not have been some melting involved,” Jane answers coyly, and Darcy swats her with her purse. 

“You sly dog, you,” Darcy teases, but deep down she’s filled with affection. God, she’s happy for Jane. If anyone deserves this kind of love, it’s Jane Foster. 

“We make it work,” Jane admits, biting down on her lower lip, “He’s a busy guy, and you already know my hectic schedule with work.” Darcy murmurs in agreement as Jane continues, “But he’s made time to see more and more of Loki lately. What he told you on the phone last week was the most I’ve heard him talk about it so far.”

“Really?” Darcy asks, assuming Jane had heard all about their weekly meetings. Knowing that the brothers are keeping the contents of their meetings extra-confidential is news to her.

“Whatever they’ve been talking about, it’s between them.” Jane shrugs, “When Thor’s ready to tell me about it, he will. I just know that whatever it is they’re discussing…it’s going well.”

This makes Darcy’s heart thump triumphantly. Oh how far things have come in one year’s time. For the first time in a long time, the thought of seeing Loki causes an intense swell of excitement to bubble up in her chest.

Darcy wraps her arm around Jane as the sun dips over the lake, the warm glow of twilight settling around them. And she knows, no matter what happens tomorrow, everything will be okay.

__________________________________

The sound of the church bells is almost deafening, in that awestruck sort of way.

She sits quietly in the last row of pews, feeling practically engulfed by the amount of people filing in around her. It only makes sense, she supposes, with the kinds of circles Natasha and Clint run in, that there would be hundreds of people at the wedding. But still…Darcy can’t stop herself from craning her neck every time another group walks into the church, hoping she might recognize that familiar raven black hair. 

The ceremony starts before she has a chance to spot him, but for the time being, that’s alright. Because Natasha begins walking down the aisle to the sound of beautiful violins, and she’s wearing the most stunningly sleek white wedding dress Darcy has ever seen, cinched with a scarlet belt at the waist. 

She looks just like Darcy remembers her, bouncy red hair and coy smile. Darcy manages to catch her eye from the back of the church, and she can see Natasha’s eyes light up in minuscule surprise. She smiles just a bit brighter right then, and Darcy likes to think it’s because of her. 

After what turns out to be a very emotional wedding (Clint starts crying during his vows, which in turn causes Natasha to tear up, which, in turn, causes half the congregation to start to weep), the guests are escorted to a cocktail hour at the reception down the coastal road. 

It’s the most gorgeous venue Darcy’s ever seen, with a large white outdoor tent situated just in front of the beach. Dozens of tables are scattered across the floor, and there seems to be hundreds of candles providing a soft glow in the fading afternoon light. As far as romantic receptions go, Darcy would be hard pressed to find a setting that tops this. 

A live jazz band starts playing a soft tune as the guests mill into the tent and surrounding area, and Darcy suddenly feels very awkwardly out of place. Of course Clint and Natasha haven’t arrived yet, but she doesn’t recognize anyone else around. Most notably, she still hasn’t spotted Loki yet. So she does the thing that makes the most logical sense to her: she heads straight for the open bar. 

“I’ll take any kind of cocktail,” Darcy says, sauntering through the crowd of mingling people and up to the bar. “Surprise me.”

“You got it,” The bartender says, before flickering his eyes just beyond Darcy’s shoulder, “And you?”

“I think I’m good for right now,” A deep, unmistakable voice replies, and Darcy turns around, knowing exactly who she'll find. 

He stands behind her, all six feet of him, clad in a sharp black suit and tie, hair perfectly slicked back and ending just above his shoulders. His green eyes seem warmer somehow, and they crinkle around the edges as he looks at her. And he smiles. 

“Loki,” She breathes his name like a prayer. This is it - the moment she’d flipped between dreading and anticipating for almost an entire year, her emotions always so concretely extreme when envisioning what it would be like. But for some reason, now that he’s standing here in front of her, she doesn’t feel like having a heart attack, or doing a back-flip, or vomiting, or diving head first into a wedding cake. 

She just feels at home. 

“Darcy,” He replies just as softly, his eyes flicking across her own, as if he can’t really believe she’s standing in front of him. “You look lovely.” The bartender slides the drink across the counter towards the pair, but it goes untouched. 

“Thanks,” Darcy can feel her cheeks heat up, stealing a glance down at the emerald green dress she was wearing. It was a show stopper for sure, shimmering whenever it caught the light. And Jane had been right, it really was doing wonders to accentuate her in all the right places. But when Darcy looks back up at Loki, he’s only staring into her eyes.

“I wasn’t aware you’d be here tonight,” Loki says, sounding sincere enough for Darcy to believe him. “Would you like to…I mean, perhaps, if you’re not otherwise preoccupied…take a short walk with me before the reception? Just down the beach?” He gestures with one hand to the beautiful shoreline just beyond them, before turning panicky and beginning to stammer a bit, “If you’d rather not I completely understand, if I were in your position I might not want to take a walk with me either, I just - ”

“Loki, stop,” She chuckles, shaking her head as she saves him from his misery. She’s never seen him so flustered before. It’s incredibly endearing. “I’ll take a walk with you.”

The worry on his face melts away with her words, the tension he’d been holding onto slipping away with palpability, “Wonderful. It’s been a long time.”

Darcy swallows his words, and there’s a bit of nostalgia stinging in her throat as she replies, “We have a lot to catch up on.” She casts a wary glance back towards the party behind them, part of her wondering if he’s here with anybody else, “You won’t be missed or anything?”

Loki shrugs with a small smile, extending his arm for Darcy to take as they begin to walk together, “I don’t particularly feel like being in anyone else’s company right now.”

The cocktail hour is still going on, giving them plenty of time before Clint and Natasha make their reappearance. The pair makes their way down towards the beach, a small path guiding the way as it winds down to the white shore. The moon is out already, glowing translucently in the sky over the ocean, the small swell of waves setting a tranquil scene in the fading light of day.

They walk in silence for a few minutes, each breathing in the salty and fresh sea air. Darcy glances up at Loki a few time, the ‘How have you been?’ question burning just on the tip of her tongue every time. But she just can’t force it out of her mouth for some reason. Instead, she finds another inquiry escaping her lips.

“How is Fenix?” She asks, genuinely interested in the little girl that had stolen her heart no more than a year prior. 

“She’s fantastic,” Loki responds with the pride of a father, “Almost eight years old and as bright as ever. I swear one day she’ll be more famous than I once was.” 

“Let’s hope not,” Darcy makes the joke before even thinking about it, but Loki laughs at it nonetheless. 

“Fair assessment.” He replies, raising one eyebrow with a smirk on his face. He turns a bit more serious before continuing, “She missed you, you know, so much. When you left.”

Darcy feels her heart drop in her stomach. She’d been afraid of that. “What did you tell her?” She asks, biting on her lower lip. 

“I told her I fired you,” Loki says matter-of-factly, causing Darcy to look at him with surprise. “That it was my fault. I couldn’t have her hating you. Not after all that you’d done for her. Not when your choice to leave had nothing to do with her.” 

The words hang between them as Darcy stares at him. This is the first time she truly feels like she’s starting to see the outline of a new man. She feels a jab of sadness as she replies quietly, “But she must have hated you…” 

Loki shrugs his shoulders, tightening his jaw as he lets out a breath, “Yeah, well…she deserved to hate her father for once.” 

“We began spending more time together after that,” He continues with a small, self-pitying laugh, “So I’m pleased to say she doesn’t hate me quite as much any more. She just doesn't idolize me like she once did. There's respect between us now. I think that's a good thing. She’s growing up. It’s odd finally noticing how fast it goes,” He says, tilting his head, “I wish I would have noticed sooner.”

Darcy looks up at him with sympathy, their eyes meeting in a knowing glance, “You’re noticing now.” 

They walk in silence for a few more seconds, letting the weight of their conversation come to a comfortable end before Loki turns his head towards her, “And…how is your job in New York? Working for Stark…you must love that.”

Darcy can’t tell if it’s meant to be entirely sarcastic, but that doesn’t stop her from giving a genuine answer, “Actually…I do. I’ve been offered a chance to work on a project in Japan this New Year.”

Now it’s Loki’s turn to look at her with surprise, “You’re kidding? Darcy, that’s…incredible.”

She purses her lips together to keep the smile from spreading across her face in an effort to remain humble, “I haven’t exactly accepted the job yet though. I give my final answer this week.” 

“Why wouldn’t you take the job?”

“I have a list of pros and cons I keep tallying in my head.”

“That better be a damn good list. Let me hear them.”

Darcy smiles, laughing a little as she runs a hand through her hair. She can feel the blush creeping up in her cheeks and looks everywhere but his eyes as she replies: “Well, pros: no more expensive-ass apartment. Or expensive food. Or expensive electricity bill. Everything’s gunna be paid for me over there. Also: Japan. Hellooo.” She says like it’s obvious why anyone would ever not want to visit. “I’ve never been out of the country before. Also it’s a huge promotion at work.”

“Those all sound like perfectly good reasons to take the job,” Loki replies, “So, what’s stopping you?”

Darcy can feel herself deflating a little at the question. Thus far, her cons list has consisted of very vague doubts that she’d been too nervous to properly explore herself. She could say she’s be scared about living in another country. Or that she wasn’t cut out for the job. But she knows those reasons are too lame and not even exactly true. 

She looks up at Loki, “I don’t know.”

A small smile tugs at the corner of his lips as his green eyes meet hers, “Then I think you already have your answer.” 

They’re still staring at each other when the faint sound of applause and cheering echoes from the tent, forcing them to look back in the direction they’d come. Natasha and Clint have finally arrived and the reception is beginning. Darcy jerks her head back towards the party, “We should probably get back in there. Come on, I’ll buy you a drink.”

“Nice try, Darcy Lewis, I know the drinks are free,” Loki shoots her a dry look, with a wry smile, “But I appreciate the sentiment. And I don’t drink anymore, actually.”

Darcy gives him an impressed look. Another shade of improvement: alcohol had always brought out the worst in him, making him more susceptible to the demons he dealt with. Thor’s words from earlier are ringing truer and truer with every second she spends with Loki. 

“I do, however, still partake in the mary jane from time to time,” He continues slyly, pulling out a joint from his pocket as if to prove his point, and Darcy bursts out laughing. 

“The ‘mary jane’? Who are you, my grandpa?” She jabs him playfully in the side. 

"I certainly hope not," He jabs her back, “Come find me in a half hour and I might even share some with you. Besides, I’m not done catching up with you yet. Not by a long shot.” 

“So this is your way of bribing me, huh?” Darcy pauses to eye him up, an unstoppable smile stretching across her face, “You’re on.”

__________________________________

In the half hour she has to spare, Darcy grabs some food and finds Natasha and Clint mingling with guests. When she approaches them, Natasha’s face lights up again as she excuses herself from her guests to see Darcy.

“You made it!” Natasha greets Darcy enthusiastically, wrapping her arms around her in a hug. 

“Wouldn’t miss it,” Darcy replies squeezing her back with a matching intensity. “I can’t believe you two are married! Congrats.”

“Thank you,” Natasha replies, blushing a little as she shows off her wedding band in the shape of a golden arrow, “We’ve been together forever, so we just figured why not, you know? It’s as good a time as any.” 

The two catch up with each other, exchanging details about their lives. Natasha still works for Loki, though not as much as she used to. When the subject of him is breached, Natasha regards Darcy carefully. 

“I know it might have been awkward for you to come here, but I’m glad you did.” She says with a small smile, “Have you seen him yet?”

“I have,” Darcy nods her head, catching his eye from across the room. The grin on his face is full of mischief as he slips out a side entrance, “But I don’t think we’ve finished our conversation just yet.”

A few guests interrupt their reunion just then, wanting to extend their congratulations to the new bride. Darcy hugs her friend once more, promising they’ll speak again soon, as she slips out the same side entrance as Loki. 

She finds him in the lobby of the reception hall just up the hill, a swanky and lavish building that would have been used to house the reception in case of rain. Her eyes widen when she finds him just inside, looking around the fancy lobby.

“We can’t light up in here, are you nuts?” Darcy asks with a hushed tone, feeling giddy despite herself. 

“Follow me,” He says mysteriously, a twinkle in his eye as he takes her hand and leads them up a back stairwell, up what seems like flight after flight of stairs. Darcy has to take her heels off, out of breath as they finally reach a balcony at the top. 

Loki pushes open the door, and the warm nighttime breeze blows across Darcy’s hair as they step outside. The view offers the reception twinkling on the beach below them, and the ocean just beyond that. 

“Whoa,” Darcy breathes, looking around. There’s even a few reclining chairs and a lounge-type couch to accommodate them on the balcony, “How did you find this?”

“I spotted it earlier while we were on our walk,” Loki shrugs like it’s no big deal, “I thought it might be the perfect place to partake, wouldn’t you agree?” 

“Let’s do it,” Darcy replies with her best game face, loving the way she felt around him right now. Not realizing how much she really did miss it. “But first, you’ve got to lose that jacket and tie. Too formal.”

He laughs, a quiet chuckle as he removes the stiff clothing. He lights up the joint, taking a puff before extending it to Darcy. They lean against the balcony, staring off into the stars. 

“So, there’s something else I’ve been meaning to tell you,” Loki begins after a while, drawing out his words.

“Shoot,” Darcy says, eyes falling on his lazily. She’s already feeling loose and open from the drug, her mind and heart clear and open. 

“I’ve been talking to Thor again,” Loki begins, walking from the rail of the balcony to go sit down on the couch directly behind them. Darcy turns around and watches him, elbows resting on the rail behind her. “You may or may not have known that already. I know my brother is dating your best friend.”

“That he is, and yes, I was aware,” Darcy nods her head, averting her gaze for a moment before looking back at him, “I’ve got to say, I’m…I’m really proud of you, Loki.”

Loki’s gaze never leaves hers as replies quietly, “Thank you. But that’s not the only thing I wanted to discuss with you.” 

Darcy finds herself walking towards him, coming to sit opposite him on the couch. She pulls her legs up to her chest and turns to face him, prompting him to continue. He’s staring at her intently as he continues, “Thor and I have been discussing our music. We think it’s an integral part of our relationship. The music is us, no matter who we are or where we go.”

He takes a deep breath before continuing, “I haven’t told anyone this, but…we’re thinking of playing again together. On tour, all of our past hits. And then, after that…creating new music.” 

“No way,” Darcy breathes, her eyes going wide. She looks at the small, nervous smile on his face, unbelieving that this is the same man she’d known only a year ago. A man so filled with hate and disgust that he couldn’t even hear his brother’s name without running away. And now here he is, seeking back his family and entertaining the idea of rekindling their professional relationship. And was this really the same man who had once refused to confide anything in her, now openly seeking her approval? 

“What do you think?” Loki asks quietly, hope in his eyes. 

“I think that’s brilliant,” Darcy responds with sincerity. She’s never seen him so fresh-faced and innocent, so youthful and full of hope and enthusiasm for the future. She can’t even help herself from leaning down, cradling his face with one hand, and kissing him right on the open mouth. 

Loki pulls back a little after he registers what’s happening, her lips on his, startled at her response. Darcy herself blinks in surprise at what she’d just done, looking at him with uncertainty as she whispers, “Was that okay?” 

He doesn’t respond for a second, his face unreadable. And then his eyes light up with such passion and intense want Darcy thinks she’s going to melt straight into a puddle. Fortunately for her, he reaches up and pulls her down into him, whispering “come here,” right before their mouths meld together once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> note: the next chapter is a continuation of this, and there will be sexytimes ahead, also an explanation of "the letter." all will come to a complete end :)


	22. Grand Finale

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for your unyielding love and support for this story. It means more to me than you could ever know.

When Darcy presses her lips to Loki’s, its like a flood of relief comes pouring through her body. After time, things become distant in your memory. The sound of someone’s voice. The way their hair smells as you comb your fingers through it. Where exactly that cute little freckle you loved was located: just above the collar bone or just below?

But those things come rushing back in crystal clarity when you’ve been reunited, and suddenly you feel so stupid for ever doubting the way their mouth tasted like fresh mint as your lips part theirs. Because of course it does. How could you have ever thought it was anything different?

Darcy relishes in the way Loki feels against her, all strong and lean and protective as he pulls her into his chest, whispering “come here”. It only adds to the experience that she’s high, too, and she knows as much with ironic burning awareness. This makes every touch, every lingering swirl of tongue, every longing sigh simmer through her blood like burning embers. 

She’s kissing him again. Holy shit, she’s kissing Loki again. Her thoughts are consumed with the way he wraps his arms around the small of her back, pulling her easily into his lap as he leans back against the couch. He sighs into her mouth, tongue gently butting against hers as his hands roam down her backside, stopping to firmly grip her ass through her dress.

Darcy pulls back from the kiss, resting her forehead against his. She can see his green eyes lit with intent as she studies him through under her lashes. “I missed this,” She whispers, kissing him softly, lips lingering on his own.

“I missed _you,_ ” He says, voice low and rumbly. She nods her head, kissing him again, her arms looped haphazardly around his shoulders. She throws herself into this kiss, arching her back against him, pressing her full weight into his lap. 

Their bodies can’t get enough of each other. His touch feels like fire, his fingers teasing the hem of her dress, skimming her thighs as he inches it up higher and higher. And her own hands comb up through his hair, tilting his head at just the right angle to kiss him even deeper. Little gasps of “oh” and “ah” mingle in the finite amount of air between them.

When she rolls her hips against him, the evidence of his shared arousal becomes apparent, and they both moan into each other’s mouths.

“I want…” Loki pants out, voice strangled by the way she starts rubbing up against him. He grasps her thighs tighter. 

“I do, too,” Darcy whispers, tucking her face into the crook of his neck, kissing him beneath his ear. Her hand comes down and makes swift work of his zipper, freeing the bulge in his pants. Loki groans as she begins to palm him through the fabric of his briefs, the sound caught in the back of his throat. 

They’re both panting as she guides him out, hand a feather-light touch as she traces him from root to tip. And he’s just as big as she remembers. Fuck, she wants this. Missed this.

“Condom?” He asks with a breath, pausing to look up at her in question.

“Birth control,” She shakes her head in affirmation, hair tumbling forward to partially cover her face. She leans up off him, just enough to reach down and pull her underwear off. When she presses against him again, the slick heat of her core against his cock, they both hiss out at the sensation. She ruts against him, sliding up and down his chest, again and again, coating him between her slick folds. She’s winding him up, feeling him beneath her, soaking in every detail, but she can’t help but shudder at the sensation herself. 

His eyes are full of awe and lust and wonder as he matches her gaze. She leans down and kisses him full on the mouth, nipping on his lower lip, flicking her tongue across it. “Wanna ride you,” She whimpers desperately, rubbing herself harder against his hot length, “Make you come.” 

“ _Fuck,_ ” Loki groans, tipping his head back against the seat and exposing his neck. He sounds pained, like he won’t last much longer, “Do it. Please.” 

Darcy raises herself up slightly, and when she comes back down, it’s right on top of his leaking tip. She leans forward and places her lips against his neck as she slowly sinks down onto him, and the low moan of gratitude and satisfaction he makes causes her to close her eyes in bliss. 

It feels better than she remembers. It feels like heaven. Being stretched and filled by his impossibly hot length. She just sits there for a few seconds, thoughts swimming in a hazy cloud of lust, before gently rocking her hips forward against him. They both gasp at the movement.

“You’re so tight,” He chokes out, hands gripping her ass as she rocks forward again on top of him, “Oh, fuck, _Darcy_ …”

“Shh,” She commands softly, sliding up and down, up and down, “Sit back and let me ride you.”

He groans and nods his head once as she starts a rhythm, slowly stretching herself full of his cock, her movements lazy as she grinds down on him. When his lips find her neck and begin to suck, her movements become more erratic, needing him to come in her, needing to feel it. 

She’s about to start bouncing wildly in his lap when his hands come down to the small of her back to steady her, guide her. She whimpers, feeling so hot and tight, craving movement. Loki’s whisper is all at once rough and gentle against her skin as he whispers, “Easy. Don’t rush. You’re beautiful like this.” 

Her eyes snap up to meet his through hooded eyes, his words triggering something deep inside her. The tenderness in which he now spoke. With one hand, he raises the back of it to gently caress her cheek, his eyes locked on hers, “You’ve always been beautiful to me. Ever since the day you walked through my door.”

“Loki…” She whispers, her heart beating like a steel drum in her chest. She can feel tears prick at her eyes, and vaguely she wonders if it’s only the drug causing this swell of emotions or something else. Maybe a mix of the two. 

The strong hand around her waist guides her, pulling her forward and pushing her back down onto his cock. Their gaze never leaves one another as the pace builds, until their breathing is ragged and they’re left panting with open mouths. Darcy’s mouth falls open in a silent “oh,” feeling herself come closer to the edge, the coil in her gut winding itself tighter and tighter…

His teeth are clenched, jaw set in concentration as he rolls up into her, making her cry out. He does it once more, his eyes set in determination and lust as he whispers ruggedly, “I can’t…not for much longer…”

“Me too,” Darcy nods her head fervently, understanding perfectly. “Come on. Fill me up,” She pleads, grinding onto his cock, “Want your come.” 

When he jerks his hips up once more though, it’s Darcy that comes first, his name spilling from her lips with a broken cry. She buries her face in his neck, feeling her inner walls twitch around his cock, the sensations of pleasure rolling through her again and again. Oh how she missed this. No one has been able to make her come the way he does. 

“ _Yes,_ ” He groans, pumping himself into her again and finally coming with a series of low moans. They’re riding out their orgasms together, hers finishing as his begins, and it’s incredible. 

They sit like that, exhausted and out of breath, for a few minutes longer. Darcy’s ears are still ringing with the intensity of her orgasm, the sound slowly receding to reveal the sound of Loki’s heartbeat just beneath her. She nuzzles him a little, kissing his jaw until her lips once again find his own.

“Should we get back to the party?” Darcy asks, pulling back and biting her own lip in hesitancy. _I don’t want this to be over yet _, she thinks instead, wanting to stay in his embrace as long as she can.__

__Loki’s crooked grin slowly spreads as he whispers, “I think they’ll be fine without us for a little while longer, don’t you?”_ _

__She nods her head, leaning down to kiss him again as. She’s still a little high, her head in the clouds, and she has no intentions of coming down just yet. And thankfully, it seems, neither does he._ _

____

__________________________________

The next thing Darcy knows, her eyes are snapping open to find only blinding sunlight, and the faint buzzing of her phone alarm is shaking the cushions of the couch she’s sleeping on. The alarm she’d set to remind herself for her flight back to NYC.

She takes a deep breath, inhaling the salty ocean spray. The wedding is long over by now, everyone having gone back to their hotels. 

“Shit,” She mumbles, rubbing her eyes and smearing them with last night’s makeup. She rolls over on the couch, noticing that Loki is nowhere in sight, even though she’s about ninety percent sure they fell asleep here together. That is, after at least a half a dozen rounds of the marathon reunion sex they’d had. 

The memory causes her stomach to flip in a pleasant way. Everything had felt so real and incredible, having him in her arms again. The way he moved inside her. His soft lips covering every inch of her skin, making her arch and writhe against him. The look in his eyes like she was the most valuable thing in the world. It was almost too much. Too good to be true. 

But where is he now?

She pushes herself off the couch, finding her dress lying on the patio floor next to her. She pulls it off the ground and slips it on, wishing she had an extra pair of clothes to wear on her flight, but it’s too late now. The best she can do is grab a sweater at the airport. 

She’s just pulling her hair back into a ponytail when the glass door to the balcony slides open, and Loki is standing there in the same disheveled clothes he wore last night, plus a pair of aviators to block the sun. He’s got two cups of coffee in his hands, and he reaches up to tug off the shades as he looks at her quizzically. 

“Are you leaving?” He asks, the question coming out with a hint of surprise in his voice.

“Oh, uh,” Darcy swallows, standing up from the couch and grabbing her phone and purse. She bites her bottom lip as she looks at him, nodding her head, “Yeah. I have a flight back to New York that leaves in a couple of hours. Gotta get back to the real world, right?”

She laughs a little, trying to sound lighthearted, but the sound comes out humorlessly. It’s the truth though. She knows she can’t stay in this world with him forever. The fact that he hasn’t even asked her to only solidifies her position. Yes, he’s changed, and so has she, but it’s time to move forward with their lives on the separate paths they’ve started on. Last night was simply a beautiful reunion, despite how short-lived it may have been.

“Right,” Loki responds slowly, nodding his head. He extends a coffee, and she takes it gratefully, “For the road, then?” 

“For the road,” Darcy repeats with a small smile, tipping her cup up in cheers and taking a sip. She locks eyes with him, waiting for him to say something, anything. Just so she knows last night wasn’t totally meaningless. 

“It was…wonderful seeing you again,” Loki replies finally, nodding his head. There’s a glint in his eyes when he finishes, “Truly. Have a safe flight home, Darcy.”

“You too,” She responds, heart sinking a little in her chest, “I mean, it was good seeing you again, too. Not the thing about flying, because I’m the only one flying, obviously, and - ” She pauses, taking a huff of breath to control her stammering. When she looks at him again, she smiles softly, sympathetically. “Goodbye, Loki.”

She brushes past him after that, hating that their awkward parting was as drawn out as it was. It echoes their last goodbye in many ways, except this time, she doesn’t feel quite so miserable. Maybe a tad dejected. But this is for the best, she reasons. They had lives to lead in polar opposite directions, and this is just the fateful happenstance that crossed their paths one last time. 

She thinks about him the whole cab ride to the airport. And not just the sex, but everything. How he’d acted. What he’d said. There was a change in his eyes, she could see it clear as day. The thought makes her happy, reassures her. If she’s leaving him, at least she’s leaving him knowing that he’s in a better place than last time. 

Grabbing her lone bag, she takes a step onto the curb outside the airport, feeling the hot rays of the August sun beat down on her back. Summer in California always was her her favorite time of year. 

Slinging her bag over her shoulders, she marches dutifully into the airport, her mind still lingering on her final goodbye with Loki. Deep down, she knows there is a part of her that will always love him. It’s not sad, or regretful, or painful. It’s simply a fact of her life. 

What she does regret, though is their final moments together. Why hadn’t he said anything else, when he looked so eager to speak to her? Was it her fault, should she have said more? Did she leave too soon? God, if she could just go back and have one more chance to - 

“Darcy!”

She whirls around on the sidewalk at the sound of her own name, only feet away from walking through the revolving doors and into the airport. She squints against the sun to see the person calling out to her, but she’d recognize that voice anywhere.

“Loki?” She asks, staring at him as he runs up to her, still dressed in his clothes from last night. He’s a little out of breath, and when paired with the urgency with which he’d called out, she can only guess he’d just pulled up to the curb. “What are you doing here?” 

“Last time I let you leave without telling you the truth,” Loki says, his breath coming out in a rush, the level of sincerity in his expression squeezing Darcy’s heart tighter and tighter, “Without telling you how I felt.” 

He’s standing in front of her now, towering over her, so close that she can practically hear the wild thumping of his heart in his chest. Or maybe that was her own. This can’t be real. This can’t be happening. Oh my god, is this happening? When she looks up at him expectantly, he reaches down, cupping her face in both hands and kissing her soundly on the mouth. 

“ _Oh -_ ” She breathes the word right before his lips cover hers, the kiss so strong and full of unspoken passion that she drops her bag on the ground. It doesn’t matter anymore that they’re in the middle of the LAX drop off, hundreds of people swirling about them, cars rushing by on the street. Because she closes her eyes and kisses him back, feeling the way his mouth moves in synch with her own, and all that matters is that she’s with him. 

Loki breaks the kiss, pulling back and nuzzling his nose against hers, both of their breaths having been taken away by the kiss. His green eyes sear into hers as he whispers, “In your letter you told me why you left. How you couldn’t love someone who didn’t know how to love himself. Who didn’t know what he wanted,” He pauses, pressing his lips into a thin line, “And it took me a while to understand that. To understand something about myself that you seemed to know with such clarity.” 

“I didn’t know what to do when you left. I was...devastated. Crushed. In fact, it might have actually been the rock-bottom loneliness that finally turned me to Thor one afternoon. After years and years of silence, what did I have to lose anymore, really? And, ironically, I came to forgive him. But do you know what surprised me the most?” He whispers, his voice so soft and full of revelation, “I forgave myself. And I know what I want now.”

Darcy feels like she’s holding her breath, all of eternity hanging on an edge. Her heartbeat is so loud in her ears she almost doesn’t hear the next words that escape his lips. 

“I want _you,_ Darcy Lewis.” He says with fiery conviction, his eyes blazing with meaning, “I love you. And I am not letting you board that plane without you knowing it.” 

Darcy can’t help but part her lips in awe, staring up at the man who has so openly bared his soul to her. He’s laid it all out on the line: his mind, body, and spirit. So vulnerable and so unlike the Loki she once knew who kept his secrets hidden and locked away. It’s with this final admission that she knows he’s not the man she once knew. 

He’s better. 

She throws her arms around his neck, crashing her lips to his as she kisses him with as much intensity as he had just kissed her. She knows this isn’t a dream; it’s very much real life. And that makes the kiss taste ever sweeter. He responds eagerly, his mouth seeking to devour hers as his fingers tangle themselves up in her hair, pulling her closer and closer. 

“Oh, Loki…” She whispers, finally pulling back with a half-laugh, half-sob, knowing she’s wearing a stupid grin on her face and not caring one bit. She laughs again, wiping the tears away from her eyes with the back of her hand. “You made me ruin my makeup. Now I’m gunna look like shit.”

Her dry sarcasm causes them both to laugh, both fully aware that they already look completely disheveled in their clothing from the night before. But her quip blessedly lightens the mood somehow, her heart singing a new song. And one look into his green eyes tells her he feels the same.

“I love you, too,” She smiles up at him sympathetically, “I always have. But…I still have to go back to work. I’m taking that job in Japan. I can’t throw that away.”

“And I’m not asking you to,” Loki shakes his head fervently, “I would never take that away from you. But we can make this work, Darcy. New York, Japan, California…I’ll only ever want you. No matter the time or the distance. Just tell me that you’ll be mine.”

The sound of love and commitment in the tone of his voice fills her with such hope and promise that it’s impossible to imagine a world in which she could ever deny him. This is her happy ending. No settling. No compromises. Just a love that is so finally equal.

“You big idiot,” Darcy chastises him lovingly, burying her face into the crook of his neck as she hugs him. “Of course I’m yours.”

__________________________________

**TWO YEARS LATER**

Darcy races out the door of her apartment towards the elevator, jabbing the 'down' button furiously over and over again. In her hands are her heels, under her arm is her clutch, and she wishes she’d had time to make her hair look wavier. But she’d spent way too much time being indecisive on her dress that the hair went forsaken.

“Come on, come on…” She pants with impatient agitation, bouncing from one foot to the other. When the elevator still shows no sign of opening in the imminent future, she rolls her eyes and abandons ship with an “Oh, fuck it.” 

Darcy bolts towards the stairs, taking them two at a time, the bare soles of her feet slapping against the cold cement as she races down to the lobby. Once she reaches it, she finds Jin sitting in his usual spot at the front desk, and Darcy gives him a wide-eyed, crazy look.

“Jin! Is the taxi I called for outside?!”

“Yes, Miss Lewis,” He answers, giving her a skeptical eye, “He’s been honking for ten minutes.” 

“ _Augh!_ ” She cries, running towards the front doors of her building. She throws her head back with an afterthought, “Thanks, Jin!” 

There’s a rush of warm, perfectly comfortable August wind as Darcy steps out into the heart of Tokyo. All around her are buzzing neon lights, skyscrapers reaching towards the heavens, the crowded bustle of cars and pedestrians, all things she’s grown used to by now. 

Flashing advertisements flood the screens of the electronic billboards on the city block, and she has a split second to admire one right before opening the door of her cab. It’s Thor and Loki, standing shoulder to shoulder, dressed in all black, guitars in hand. The smolders on each of their faces would be enough to melt the hearts of women worldwide. Men too, probably. The advertisements stretches upwards, covering almost the entire side of the building, the words “Odinson Reunion Tour” stamped across the bottom in bold black font. 

Her phone is buzzing in her clutch as she slides into the cab, and she has to shout the address at the driver to be heard over the sound of the radio blaring in the front. 

“So sorry, Miss,” The driver apologizes, turning down the music. An Odinson classic, ironically enough. “I love this song. Did you know they are in Tokyo tonight? This is the last stop on their world tour.”

She smiles to herself, fishes her phone out of her clutch as she replies, “Yeah. I think I heard that somewhere.”

Darcy answers her phone on what has to be close to one of the last rings, “Talk to me, baby.”

“Darcy!” Jane’s voice greets her in concern from the other end of the phone, “Where are you?” 

“Coming,” Darcy grunts, wedging the phone between her shoulder and ear as she leans down to strap on her heels, “Couldn’t decide what dress to wear.”

“Did it really matter?” Jane deadpans, and Darcy can imagine her face, “You haven’t seen Loki in eighteen months - ”

“ - Trust me, my phone bill proves it - ”

“Well then, that should be reason enough for you to get here as soon as possible!” Jane says, her voice rising to a giddy yell at the end, and Darcy can tell she’s excited. “The show’s about to start!” 

“On it, Einstein.” 

When Darcy finally arrives at the arena, she has half a mind to ditch the heels again as she sprints inside. The place is packed, filled to the brim with screaming Odinson fans that she can hear from outside. Tickets had sold out in mere seconds, shattering records for the quickest sell-out in Japanese history. Similar records had been broken across the globe when they’d played in the states, the United Kingdom, Australia and Singapore. 

She finally finds Jane off to the side of the stage in a private space they’ve been cleared to stand in, but before she notices Darcy’s there, someone else does first. A little girl at Jane’s side with a head full of raven black hair whirls around, her eyes lighting up as they fall on Darcy. 

“Fenix!” Darcy exclaims, opening her arms to hug the girl as she comes rushing towards her.

“Darcy!” Fenix cries back, wrapping her arms just above Darcy’s waist in a bear-hug. Darcy lifts her off the ground, twirling in a circle, heart close to bursting at seeing the little bundle of energy once again.

Darcy groans with exaggeration as she sets her down, “You are getting too big for that, peanut.”

“I’m only nine, Darcy,” Fenix replies with sass, placing a hand on her hip. So much older than her age, it seemed. And Darcy loved her to death.

“Today it’s nine, tomorrow it’s ten,” Darcy comments over-dramatically with a wave of her hand, “Before I know it you’ll be taller than me. And then you’ll get to pick _me_ up in our bear hugs.”

Fenix giggles with both hands on her mouth at the imagery, and the sound causes Darcy to smile. She looks over at Jane, standing patiently in her stunning navy blue pantsuit with a sexy, rock-n-roll style midriff.

“ _Ow, ow,_ Jane Foster,” Darcy comments, coming over to wrap her best friend up in a hug, “You’re looking especially killer tonight. Loving the that look on you.” 

Jane pulls back from the hug with a blush, “It’s good to see you again too, Darce.”

Darcy peaks around the side of the stage, noticing the audience for the very first time. Thousands of fans, stacked in seats that climbed towards the ceiling, all bouncing up and down and cheering excitedly for a band they never imagined they’d see perform again in their lifetime. Darcy’s about to turn around and ask where the boys are when her question is answered for her.

The lights dim in the arena, and with it comes the crazed and excited screams of everyone in the building. The air of unbridled excitement is tangible, sweeping through the masses. The universal signs for the start of a show. Not just any show. The biggest show. 

With little to no fanfare, both Loki and Thor stride onto the stage together from the other side. The unbelievable cacophony of screams intensifies into a deafening roar, unlike anything Darcy’s ever heard before. The arena almost seems to be shaking with it. 

Thor walks over to his kit, adjusting his seat and picking up his sticks. Loki walks out to the microphone on the other side of the stage, picking up the guitar and slinging it across his shoulders. The set-up is simple, minimalist and clean. Just the two men and their instruments.

Loki’s so close that Darcy can see the little grin tugging up the corner of his mouth as he grabs the microphone. “I’m Loki, and this is my brother, Thor,” Loki says, his deep and smooth voice echoing out amongst the masses. He steals a glance at Darcy, letting his smile grow wider across his face before looking back out at the crowd, “And we are the Odinsons.” 

With that, he launches into his first cord, and Thor rolls out a drum beat to compliment it. The first iconic notes of one of their most popular songs. The crowd grows impossibly louder, and Darcy is in awe, watching Loki flip back his hair and begin singing into the mic. 

They play old song after old song, bringing the crowd to their feet, waving their cell phones, screaming along to the lyrics. Jane and Darcy and Fenix all get into it, screaming and swinging their hips along to the music. It’s the first time any one of them has gotten to see the men perform together. 

And Darcy can’t imagine it being any other way.

Just when the show is nearing the end, a few stage techs roll out a grand piano, which Loki goes to sit in front of. Thor stands up from his drum kit, taking a bow on center stage, before coming back and sitting in a relaxed stance on his stool, and Darcy throws Jane a curious look. 

“What’s happening?” She asks, confused. She doesn’t remember there ever being a piano solo in any of their songs. 

Before Jane can respond, Loki’s talking into the mic attached to the top of his piano, slightly out of breath. “Thank you all so much for your love tonight,” He says, pausing to accommodate the cheering, “There’s a new song we’d like to play for you, something I wrote for our upcoming album. It means a lot to me, especially, as it took me quite some time to get it right.”

He looks over at Darcy, those piercing green eyes finding hers and sending shivers down her spine as he says, “This is _The Sound of Heartstrings_.”

The noise level in the audience slowly simmers down to a hushed whisper, everyone eagerly anticipating new music from the duo. But when the first few notes waft through the speakers, Darcy’s breath hitches in her throat. It’s the same melody he played for her on the morning after their first kiss, those three years ago when she was still Fenix’s nanny. When he held her against him and whispered something about how it was still missing something…

Now, it seemed, everything was complete. 

Loki plays the sad, melancholic notes beautifully. Darcy watches as he throws himself into the music with every breath, his fingers caressing the keys in front of him. He lifts his lips to the mic, closing his eyes as he sings.

_I used to think if I could see her one last time_  
 _She’d tell me I was wrong, and I’d tell her I was right._  
 _But the times have changed, and my dear, so have I_  
 _It took me too long to realize I deserved her last goodbye._

The crowd starts taking out their cellphones at this point, slowly but surely illuminating the entire arena. But Darcy barely notices. Her eyes and ears are transfixed on Loki as he continues to play, the notes becoming more and more hopeful as he goes on, swelling together in harmony. Suddenly she feels so small, like it’s just she and him alone together. The only two people in the room. 

Thor kicks in with a marching drum beat, accompanying the song into its final moments, filling it with more hope and inspiration than its sad beginning. Everyone in the audience begins bobbing their heads in time with the beat, as if they’re carrying the invisible tune higher and higher.

 _I was too afraid to love, too scared to fly_  
 _What I needed all along out of reach in the sky._  
 _Oh, when love finds your heart, she helps spread your wings_  
 _Plays a melody on your soul, called the sound of heartstrings._

The audience is cheering again, louder and louder as the brothers finish their song. Loki throws a smile back at Thor and is met with an even larger grin from his brother. It’s a hit. An overwhelming success. 

Before the fans are even half-way quieted down, Loki’s back on the mic, picking it off the piano and standing up, the sound of his breathing mixing in and creating little huffs of feedback, “Thank you all so much. I wrote that song with the help of a lot of people, but there’s one in particular who really influenced me,” He pauses, looking at Darcy with a smile. “I wonder if she might join me on stage?”

Darcy blinks with surprise. Holy shit. The crowd cheers her on, and even Jane and Fenix are pushing her, nudging her in the direction of the stage. Somehow she finds her feet carrying her up towards Loki, the overwhelming urge to pass out from extreme stage fright only squelched by her desire not to look like an idiot. 

As soon as Loki takes her hands in his, though, her nerves are soothed. It’s been so long since she’s held those hands. Will she ever get tired of the way she feels when she’s with him? The thought seems impossible.

His thumb traces over the top of her knuckles, an intimate gesture only shared between the two of them, amongst thousands. She looks at him with round eyes that beg the question, ‘what in the world are you doing?’

He smiles at her, turning around and lifting the seat on the piano bench to pick something up from underneath. When he faces her again, he has a singular orange rose in his hand. Her favorite color rose. Just like she’d mentioned all those years ago when he’d come to her house with a dozen lilac roses, begging her forgiveness. 

She feels her eyes stinging with tears as she takes the rose from him. The happy kind of tears. The good kind. The kind she never imagined she’d ever have when she started on this journey three years ago, promising her uncle she’d take a nanny job in the Hills. All of it, every laugh, every tear, every sigh, every kiss, leading her to this moment on this stage with the man she fell in love with. 

“Darcy Lewis,” Loki says, so softly that her breath hitches in her throat. He pulls a ring out of his pocket, holding it out, kneeling before her, “Will you be mine?” 

There’s a wonderful sound that many people never recognize. One that you have to be really listening for if you ever want to hear it. It starts low and quiet in your chest, originating from deep within your heart. Slowly it begins to thrum outward, spreading in time with the beat of your heart like the smoothest melody ever created. 

It’s warm and it’s nourishing. Like laying under the shade of a large oak tree on a warm spring day. Like dipping your toes into the cool water of the tide pool. Like walking into an old bookstore filled to the ceiling with manuscripts. It’s that feeling you get when you look up at the stars and know that they’re looking back at you. Undoubtedly. Forever. You might not recognize it at first, or in some sad cases, never at all. But once you realize it’s the sound of your own heartstrings, you’ll know you’re at home.

“Always.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you interested, I wrote a final Author's Note for this story and posted it to my blog! It can be read[ here](http://mischiefgoddesscomplex.tumblr.com/post/111665997805/a-final-authors-note-on-the-sound-of).


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